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Valentina Monetta: this view reminds me of malmö
The view:
I just KNOW Shuri would be disappointed...
Why is my mom like this!!!! Hahahahahah. My dad is a hot mess and is currently drunk as fuck. Apparently, he hurt his toe and has been bleeding non stop. My mom tried to describe the scenario to me, and she was like, “you ever see a goat get their neck cut? That’s what it looked like.”
Uhhhh???
The chaos of a middle school classroom:
“Christmas is Jesus’ birthday.”
“Wait but what is Easter?”
“Jesus is reborn!”
“He isn’t reborn he comes back to life.”
“It doesn’t matter I don’t believe in him. I believe in Persephone and Athena and Zeus—“
“—And Mariah Carey.”
🙃
and i was sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties,
So there I am, topless, sittin' on this bulldozer, like, in a construction site. So I'm sittin' there, barbecue sauce on my titties, and I'm like, "What the fuck???? Again?????
DID DARA JUST CONFIRM KOURTNEY'S LAST NAME!?!??!?!?!
Okay but why does he legitimately look like Tom? 💀