im so sorry. i saw the saeray comfort post and had to come in and share a moment of imagine saeyoung with me a moment... imagine saeyoung having a bad day, just a fuckall stupid sick of everyone bad day where murphy's law is in full swing just enough to ruin his mood through the floor and irritate some old, sore bones in his mind's foundations. he will BE okay. but he has to come in and find his mc and lay on them, hide his face in their chest and his everything in their arms and know those arms will envelope him, know those hands will play with his hair and their voice will coo his name adoringly. know all this, all this is true somehow, some way- in spite of what he thinks of himself, in spite of every single day leading up to meeting them that's made him who he is... somehow, somehow!!! his mc is so unwaveringly there for him, even though he's... well. maybe not the *last* man on the planet to deserve it, there's worse, but he's... he doesn't deserve it. and he never, ever, ever wants to give it up now that he's here, muscles slackening, eyes shut and entirety melting in their hold. he knew he missed them but he didn't realize how much he ached until he started feeling relief that they're here, and so is he... he had such a bad day, kait. he missed his mc so much.
When you're Saeyoung, and you've never allowed yourself to indulge, truly indulge, you don't realize just how much it makes a difference in your life until you need it. Sure, he's been happy in your arms, he's so much better than he used to be when it comes to asking for what he wants! But even now, he has his moments where he thinks he can sit there and tough it out. Old habits die hard, you know?
Even with this new option in front of him, no, even with hundreds of new options afforded to him purely because he decided to fight the agency, his terrible father, and the rest of the world, so not only could his twin brother be free, but he could be, too... sometimes he forgets how good it feels to ask for something and receive it. God knows he's wanted it, but there's a part of him that braces for impact.
You never do that, though. You open your arms, and you hold him so tightly so that he'll never doubt himself again. It's never you that his stomach doubts, after all. The world is on fire, everything sucks, and he's afraid he might fuck up again... but you know what? That feeling isn't as suffocating when you hold him. What feels monumental turns into something quieter, and once he's had time to breathe, he knows what to do. You're his peace! He prays to God that he can do that for you, too.
He isn't perfect, but you're not asking him to be. He doesn't have to fight himself... he just needs to let his shoulders relax long enough to remember he's good enough as he is. He always has been.
