A/N: Oops I accidentally made this. I promise I'm working on requests but this was in my brain, it had to be written! Uh oh, Long fic needing multiple parts alert!
Fandom: Sanders Sides
Word count: 4939
Ship: None
Warnings: Deceit, Remus, safeword usage, some pretty intense tickles, alcohol
A/N: Part tw
Itsy Bitsy Spider
Janus had one too many drinks.
Well, maybe more than that.
He stumbled around, seemingly looking for something. He was laughing happily, something that doesn't happen often if it isn't forced out of him. As much as Patton would have loved to hear more of his precious laughing, he knew he should help.
"Jan? Whatcha doing?" Patton asks, going up to him.
"Remusss?" He asks, putting his hand on Patton's face. The bespectacled side pulled the hand off.
"No, it's Patton." Janus leans his head on Patton's shoulder, hat slipping off. A wave of giggles pursued. "Did you want Remus?" Janus shakes his head no into the shoulder. Patton wraps his arms around the snake, moving him over to sit on the couch. Patton sat against the arm of the couch and pulled Janus backwards into his lap.
"Dohoho the thihihing!" Janus giggled, almost tiredly.
"What thing?" Patton asks, confused.
"The thihing... I used to, Virgil, and he'd fall 'sssleep."
"I don't know what you're talking about, Janus." As if on cue, Virgil walked into the room and sat down on the other couch.
"Virgil?" The anxious side looked over, seeing a drunken Janus laying on Patton.
"Yeah?"
"What's he going on about?"
"Ihi lihike it! You gohotta do ihihit to me aaaaaall the time! Ohohor I be sahad! Please?" Janus babbled.
"Uh... I'm gonna need some context."
"He says he used to do it to you, and you'd fall asleep." Virgil thought for a moment, before being struck with realization.
"Uh... I-I don't know." Virgil got up and left the room, redness forming on his cheeks. Though, maybe it's not so bad. Now he can embarrass the snake.
"Jan, you gotta tell me what you want." Patton encourages.
"Plehehease?"
"Do you want me to... play with your hair?" Patton moves his hands to do just that.
"No..."
"I don't know what you want. Do you want a hug?"
"Noo!"
"Then what do you want?"
"Tired!"
"You're tired? Do you want to go to bed?" Patton asks.
"No, I wanna... Ughhhh!" He groans, putting his hands on his face.
"So dramatic." Patton giggles. "You should go to bed, kiddo."
"Nah!" He acts like a kid. Patton still drags him to his room, and as soon as his head hits the pillow, he's out like a light. The moral side turns out the light and shuts the door, going to bed himself.
"So. Just us now." The prince says from the dining table. The lights were only on in there and in the kitchen, where Virgil was.
"I guess so." Anxiety sits on the counter, looking at Roman.
"Why was Janus drunk?"
"Dunno. Dealing with your brother all day every day must be... difficult, to say the least."
"You're probably right. Why'd you go in there and come right back out?"
"Patton didn't want me turning on the TV."
"Mm. Well, I'm gonna head to bed." With that, the prince was off.
"Night."
In the morning, Janus woke up groggy, but was startled awake when he saw Virgil sitting at his desk. His arms were crossed, watching him.
"Why are you in my room?!"
"You were drunk last night."
"How does that give you the right to be in my room?"
"You told the others how you just had to be tickled all the time, otherwise you'd be sad."
"What. Why would I say that? I don't even like- Oh, you know what, I probably lie a lot more when I'm drunk." Deceit nods, though he couldn't deny the redness creeping up in his human cheek.
"Mm. Yeah. Indeed." Virgil's voice dripped with sarcasm.
"Why would I even say such a thing?"
"You wanted to be tickled. You never said the word. But you did say 'that thing I used to get Virgil to go to sleep.'"
"Oh. I'm in trouble now, aren't I?"
"No, of course not! I just, didn't know you 'don't' like being tickled." He used air quotes.
"I don't." He hissed.
"Mm. Then explain the blush."
"I'm hot, is all."
"Oh, ok. Welp, I should get going. I just wanted you to know I have blackmail on you. Have a nice day!"
"I don't like you." Janus mutters.
"What was that?" Virgil asks, even though he heard the snake clearly.
"I said, you too!"
"That's what I thought." Virgil left the room and closed the door, leaving Deceit to get dressed and such.
"This is not only terrifying." Deceit thinks. "But fueling a major Lee mood." He breathes, checking the mirror to be sure he's presentable, and not blushing, and leaves his room.
"Hey Jan Jan!" Remus greets, with way too much energy for this early.
"Hello, Remus." He continues to walk to the dining room, where he finds Virgil talking to Roman.
Odd and terrifying.
"Good morning Janus! You feeling better?" Patton asks.
"No, not at all."
"Oh, I'm sorry-" Deceit sighs at Patton's gullibility.
"I was lying."
"Oh. Then that's good!"
"What are you cooking?"
"Pancakes! They'll be ready soon!" Janus nods, and goes to sit down. Virgil sits next to him and whispers.
"Today is going to be fuun!" Janus hisses, and Virgil just smirks. "So fun."
"Come now, don't fight, unless you're fighting the dragon witch!" Roman declares.
After breakfast, everyone splits to do their own activities. Logan goes to his room, Roman and Remus go to the creativity, Patton goes to his room, and Virgil and Deceit go to the living room to watch TV.
"Can we watch what I want to watch?" Virgil asks.
"But-"
"Oh, that's fine. I'll just go tell everyone that you're ticklish and want to be tickled." That word!
"Fine." Janus hands the remote to Virgil and crosses his arms.
Animaniacs?
A strange choice, but it wasn't like he could question it. Until the theme came on, and he figured out why Virgil had been so insistent on doing a children's show. Janus gave Virgil a death glare, but he ignored it.
He got into the show, but again and again he was reminded of why he was watching that show in the first place. Every 20 minutes or so, he'd see it again.
"You know, I'm thirsty." Janus finally said, reaching his limit on how many times he could see a tickle scene without spontaneously combusting. And so, Virgil followed him to the kitchen.
"Me too. Can you get me a cup of orange juice?"
"You can get it yourself!" Janus objects.
"Oh, then I guess I can tell everyone just how much you want to be tickled right now."
"No!" Janus grabs his arm before he can walk off. "I mean, I can get you a glass of orange juice." And so, he makes his own drink, before reaching for a cup for Virgil. In doing this, the anxious trait decided it'd be a good idea to poke the snake's side. He froze.
"I will slap you." He says, as he slowly brings the cup down.
"I'll get everyone to pin you down so you can have absolutely no wiggle room, and then you'll have me, Logan, Roman, Patton, and Remus tickling you all at once. Two of us will have both hands open, which means, 10, 20... 35 wiggling fingers on your ticklish little body, not to mention all the teasing that will consume you, making you that much more ticklish." Deceit hadn't noticed until now, but he'd set the cup on the counter and was backed into a corner, Virgil mere inches away from him. "Blushing? Already?"
"Virgil!" Deceit puts his hands in between himself and the mentioned. Butterflies swarmed in his stomach, so very ready to be tickled. "I don't want to be tickled!"
"Greatest lie of the century, Jan. Too bad I can see right through you."
"Stoooop!" He whines, but he'd never admit it. Footsteps come down the hallway, and they scrambled to just stand next to each other.
"What's going on here?"
"Ah, Roman! Just the prince I wanted to see. Can you go get-"
"Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up!" Janus repeated, until he just placed his hand on Virgil's mouth. Virgil tried to pry his hand off, Deceit clearly disconcerted about what he was going to say.
"Go get the-"
"SHHHHHHH!" Janus shushed him, being louder than Virgil.
"What is going on?" Roman asks.
"Others!" Virgil got out, before another hand was placed on his mouth.
"Ok, I'll go get the others."
"No!" Janus pleads.
"Haha-" Virgil mocks, but Janus hisses at him. Roman was already down the hallway. He couldn't stop him now. Janus uses his plan B.
Hide.
So, he runs to his room and locks the door, sitting against it.
Meanwhile, when Roman got back with the others, Deceit was gone.
"Guys. Today I learned that Janus likes being tickled. We have to go tickle him!"
"How'd you figure that out?" Logan asks.
"Long story."
"We have time. Where is he?" Roman asks.
"In his room. So, come on, we have to go get him! It'll be funny."
"Maybe he doesn't want it right now." Logan says.
"You're not listening to me. He's been wanting to be tickled all day. I'm giving everyone an opportunity to 'get him back' and to tickle him. Don't you like his laugh?" He asks Patton, who nods. "And don't you want to get back at him for pretending to be you?" He asks Logan.
"Indeed."
"And don't you want to get back at him for lying so much?" He asks Roman, who stands, confused.
"I mean, yes, but, how did you figure out he likes being tickled? Did he forget to cover his tracks, as they say?"
"He was drunk, that's how I know."
"Isn't that kinda mean, though? Virge, he has no control over what he does or says while under the influence."
"So? He still wants to be tickled, like, a lot. He admitted it to me this morning!"
"When?" Logan asks.
"I said, 'I didn't know you don't like to be tickled', and he said, 'I don't' That's a double negative, crosses out, and it means that, indeed, he likes being tickled." Everyone looked at Logan, and he nodded. "So, is everyone game?" One by one, everyone nodded. "Good. Here's the plan:"
Meanwhile, Deceit sat at his door, trying to calm his blush and his lee mood. Everyone is about to come after him, and he knew it. He was nervous, but excited at the same time. Anticipation filled his body, other than the butterflies taking shelter in his tummy. Did he want it? Yes, of course he did. But he couldn't admit it, he had a reputation to uphold. One of the most stoic sides, the mysterious dark side.
"Janus?" He heard Remus' voice. He stood up, ear pressed against the door.
"Yeah?"
"I have a question."
"What?"
"Can I come in?" He tried the door handle. Locked.
"You can ask through the door!" Janus says. He heard a mumble. Janus unlocked the door and slowly opened it. "I'm sorry?" The door was yanked the rest of the way opened by Roman.
"Are you ticklish, Jan?" Remus asks, advancing, the others following suit. Janus was backed into his bed, so he went around it, until he, once again, was cornered.
"No!" He lied.
"Now now, lying isn't good, kiddo." Patton says. Janus sinks to the floor, hands protecting him.
"Um... I need... to... I... um... I can't... right now because..." He stutters, trying to find a way out. However, given that there are 5 people trying to tickle him, the butterflies in his tummy, and that there is no way out except for the one door in his room, it's given that he'd be prioritizing the security of himself rather than find a lie to tell.
"I-I'm sure we can talk this out, w-we..."
"Oh, of course we can talk! But first..." Virgil yanked him away from his corner and pinned him down, Logan and Patton sitting on his arms, Remus and Roman sitting on his legs.
"Wait a minute. Both hands are open for 5 people! I think I did my math wrong earlier. That means 50 fingers, all tickling you. 50 fingers skittering across your helpless body. You couldn't move if you tried." A wobbly smile made it's way onto Janus' face. Patton leaned down to talk in his ear.
"Safe word?" Logan asks. "Or stoplight method?"
"Um... y-yeah. Stoplight."
"This is ok, right? We'd never do anything you didn't want to happen to you."
"If you truly don't want it, it's perfectly fine to say so right now." Roman says.
"I-It..." He huffed, knowing he'll either have to live with this Lee mood, or be absolutely and undeniably embarrassed. He thought for a few moments, as to not turn into a stuttering mess.
"I would absolutely not like for it to happen."
"Oh, then I guess we can't tickle you." Virgil says, and the group gets up. Deceit lays there, unmoving.
"I lied! Shouldn't you know this by now? You should- it's a lie!"
"What's a lie?" Virgil asks, and the group goes back to their positions. Janus breathes.
"I would not like to be tickled."
"Mm. Even if it is a lie, we do need some form of honest consent, which means no lies, no peer pressure, no anything, just you and your honest opinion."
"Fine."
"Fine... what?"
"You can... do it."
"Do what?" Oh, if looks could kill, Virgil would've been a goner.
"You're really milking this, aren't you?"
"Of course not! We just want your honest consent, make sure we're all on the same page here." Sarcasm drips from his voice. Deceit breathed, then sighs, laying his head back on the ground.
"Okyoucantickleme."
"I'm sorry? Was that just me or all of us?"
"All."
"So... say it again? Just so we're all understanding each other."
"I hate you."
"I'm sure."
"Youallcannot- er..." He sighs. "Youallcantickleme."
"Say a little louder, and a little clearer?"
"You know what I said, just do it!" Janus whines.
"I'm triple-checking."
"You don't need to triple check!" He whined, trying to move to see how easily he could escape. He found it near impossible to move at all.
"Yes I do!"
"Just do the thing already!"
"What thing?"
"You're doing a great job forcing me to say stuff."
"Fine then. We'll all tease you then." He kneels next to his side, putting his wiggling fingers dangerously close to his tummy. Everyone else picked up on it and added their fingers.
"Nope, not gonna work." He closes his eyes, tilting his head towards the ceiling.
"Wanna bet?"
"You're not gonna win this one, Virge."
"Look at how close my fingers are to tickling you! It'll put you in pure bliss, that giggly state. C'mon, kiddo, all you gotta do is say a few words." Patton says.
"The itsy-" Remus starts.
"NO!" Janus' eyes burst open, trying his best to get away. It didn't work.
"Bitsy spider~"
"Remus! Don't!"
"Went up the water-"
"REMUS!"
"Spout. Down came the-"
"Please!" Roman watched his brother do the motions without actually touching the snake, and how it was driving him insane.
"Rain and washed-"
"Remus!" His cheeks were flushed pink, embarrassed, or something, by this game.
"The spider out."
"NO!"
"Out came the sun-"
"Stop!"
"And dried up all the rain."
"Remus! Don't!"
"The itsy bitsy spider went up the spout again." Deceit relaxed once the song was finished.
"So... I'm confused?" Virgil says.
"He's weak for those tickles."
"No I'm NOT!" He blushes. "But I won!"
"X-" Remus smirks.
"I HATE YOU!"
"Marks the spot."
"STOPIT!"
"With a circle and a dot!"
"REMUS I BEG OF YOU!"
"Up come the pirates-"
"FINE I'LL SAY IT!" And so, Remus stops. "Haha tricked- NO I WAS JOKING! I was joking! Haha, funny! Right?" He breathed. "You. All. Can. Tick...le. Tickle. Me."
"So... green light?" Virgil asks.
"Really? I gave you-"
"Digging, di-"
"GREEN!"
"Ok, you need to teach me these songs." Virgil tells Remus. Deceit lays, realizing what he's done.
"For sure."
"What have I done." Deceit says.
"You got yourself into a position where I can teach everyone about those songs!"
"You know what, I think I preferred the songs to this."
"And I think, you're full of BS." Remus says, squeezing his human side. He tries to squirm away.
"And I think, I'm confused as to why singing itsy bitsy spider and the... x marks the spot or whatever, gets to you." Virgil says.
"Oh, I just conditioned him so-"
"RemuS I SWEAR-"
"Whenever he hears those songs, it means the tickles he likes-"
"I DO NOT!"
"Are coming!"
"No! He's lying, I, for one, DO NOT LIKE CHILDISH-"
"YEAH YOU DO-" Logan sighed at the chaos and vibrated his fingers into poor Deceit's ribs. That shut him up real fast, and therefore quieting Remus.
"C'mon, guys. I think we need to stop teasing our ticklish kiddo and actually give him what he wants!" Patton says, dragging his finger ever so slowly down his ribs. Deceit inhales sharply. A few pokes to the sides and ribs and tummy. His eyes had closed again, focusing on not laughing. The pokes soon turned into strokes, very long strokes. He was struggling to keep his laughter in.
"It's ok Dee! You can laugh!" Patton says, wiggling his finger under his chin.
"No!" He said quickly, the floodgates of giggles soon to break.
And they did, once Roman and Remus joined in at the hip.
"NoOOO! Ihihhisn't fahahahair!" He bucks around, trying to get out.
Well, that was debatable, but, nonetheless bucking around. Roman giggled along with Deceit, not expecting him to have such happy laughter. Remus smiled at him, and walked his fingers upwards. "Nahahaha!"
Patton circles the snake's armpit, elicting a... definitely not a squeal. Virgil placed one hand on his tummy with wiggling fingers. He hadn't noticed it, he was too busy worrying about the other sensations, but Remus was teaching Roman how to do the itsy bitsy spider.
"GUYHYHYS!" Janus pleads.
"What is it, Jan? Did you want me to... do this?" Patton asks, digging right into his armpit. This caused a squeak.
"We're almost there!" Remus sing-songs.
"Almost where?" Virgil asks.
"You'll hear. Logan, side and armpit. Patton, armpit. Virgil, belly, me and you, hip." Remus instructs. And so, they go at each of their spots mercilessly.
"NAHAHAHAHA! R- RAHA! REHEHEMUHUHUS!" He'd never truly experienced all this at the same time. It was a bit much, until, he screamed, it fell silent, and snorts came. It felt like a wave of relief washed over him.
"Look! He turns into a puddle!" He let's up, and everyone follows suit, allowing the snake to ride out the giggles.
"Not a puddle." He mumbles. Patton strokes his snake side.
"It's ok, it's cute that you turn into a puddle when your tickled!" He strokes over the jaw, and Deceit jerks, then relaxes, soft purrs being dragged from his body.
"This... humiliating." Especially considering the part that he likes those kinds of tickles. But he'd never admit that.
"Why are you purring?" Patton asks.
"I think it has something to do with him being part snake and all." Remus shrugs.
"Can we see the songs now?" Roman asks. Remus nods.
"We have to flip him over though. It shouldn't be too hard, since he's a puddle." And so he was flipped over, and everyone sat back down.
"The itsy bitsy spiiiider went up the water spout~" He sung, spidering his fingers up his back to his shoulders. Tiny giggles escaped Deceit, not being able to stop it, but not wanting to either.
"Down came the rain and washed the spider out." Remus taps his fingers as if typing on a keyboard all the way down his back. They all noticed the sensitive lower back area.
"Out came the sun and dried up all the rain." He massaged the shoulder blades.
"Mhmhmhmhm!" Giggled Deceit, accidentally showing everyone his hissy giggles.
"Awe!" Patton cooed. Janus tried to bury his face in the floor, but it wasn't doing that good of a job.
"The itsy bitsy spider went up the spout again." He spidered his hands up his back.
I see a LOT of incorrect information when people depict Janus as “half-snake” so I want to clear some things up! And in case you’re wondering, I took a herpetology class and am basing most of my information off of my lessons as well as things I’ve learned outside of class! Warning this is a little long but if you want to learn more about snakes and write snake Janus more accurately, then here you go!
First of all, I believe (correct me if I’m wrong) that he’s based off of a ball python. It’s easy to assume that his vision would work as a thermal camera sort of thing, but that is not true! Ball pythons have heat pits, which are the holes along their mouths which sense heat, in particular body heat, so they can hone in on their prey. As for what colors they see, they have dichromatic vision, they can only see two colors. It's unclear exactly which colors ball pythons can and can't see, as we can't look through their eyes. But research suggests they can probably perceive blue and green.
In general, ball pythons can’t see very well, in general snakes will rely on smell, but not always. A completely blind snake will smell and feel more, and if they have heat pits also rely on those. Ball pythons are short sighted, and also have trouble focusing on things that dont move.
Side note: When a snake has slit pupils, it means they are nocturnal! Not all snakes are nocturnal, such as corn snakes who are diurnal and have rounded pupils.
Fang time! And teeth time in general. Actually Jaw Time.
So, a snake’s jaw doesn’t actually unhinge. Instead, their lower jaw is in two parts that move independently to help them swallow their prey. In general their mouths and the muscle around it is flexible to help them swallow prey larger than their heads.
All snakes have curved teeth, apart from egg eaters which have no teeth at all. Their teeth are curved back, and as a result they will always swallow things whole, they cannot chew. If a nonvenomous snake bites you, the most harm you’ll get is a few pinpricks unless it’s a rather big snake. The reason they have these curved teeth is to latch onto prey!
Only venomous snakes have those front fangs, by the way! There’s also three different types of those fangs!
- Rearfanged teeth and venomous fangs near the rear of the mouth, common in False Water Cobras and Hognoses
- Front fanged venomous fangs are near the front, and what most people recognize.
- Rotating fanged venomous snakes have front fangs, that are hinged and retractable. They are most common in vipers, but can also be present in rattlesnakes, adders, and gaboon vipers.
NOW for the cold blooded nonsense. This is what bothers me the most, and I don’t blame any of you for getting this confused since I didn’t know this before either.
Being cold blooded does NOT mean they are cold and will constantly seek out heat. Being cold blooded simply means that they don’t have a constant body temperature like we do, meaning they have to go to warmer or colder areas to level their body temperature.
If a snake is in hot temperature for too long, it’ll overheat like any other animal. They’re more well known to like hotter temperatures, but they will seek out cooler areas to not overheat if they feel they’re getting too hot. If a snake is sick, though, it may stay in the heat and burn itself because of this.
It’s true that snakes will get sluggish if it’s too cold, but depending on the temperature and the kind of snake it is, they usually won’t die. Snakes go through brumation, and during brumation you’d think they’d starve or dehydrate, but you’d be wrong. Snakes in general don’t move much, and are very opportunistic feeders, meaning if food’s there, they’ll eat it. But in brumation, they don’t have to eat because they aren’t moving much and that conserves their energy. They will move for water if they absolutely need it, but they can survive in cold temperatures despite what you may think. Unless it’s below a temperature they can survive at, then it’s an issue.
On the topic of feeding, usually a domesticated snake only needs to eat once a week or every other week. Again, they don’t move much unless they’re inquisitive, and again opportunistic feeders.
With ball pythons though, because of their heat pits, will refuse colder food items. They need something warm to sense that it’s probably body heat depending on the food item.
I think that covers everything! At least everything I see in fanfiction and such :)! If you have any questions i’d be more than happy to answer for you! It was fun to write this and I hope you liked this! Herpetology is confusing, and fanfiction is fanfiction, so I don’t expect 100% accuracy, I just think this is fun and that some writers will benefit from this!
