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My exchange fic for the Solas Lovers Exchange!

Fandom: Dragon Age, post Trespasser and Tevinter Nights

Characters: Varric, Solas, Cole, Regret demon, mentioned past Solavallen but no Lavellan in the actual story

Rating: T

https://archiveofourown.org/works/45532678

The (Regret) demon guffaws, great splatters of bloody mucus spraying from its wide maw. "I told them they were free. I told her she was free. She was beautiful in the twilight; eyes glowing bright in the aftermath of the ritual. It was a lie. I am a creature of pretty lies and ugly truths. I am the regret of all who know me."

The hollow feeling in his chest is familiar. Solas has thought these thoughts and felt these truths. This grotesque amalgamation is a painfully accurate representation of how it feels to have Mythal's stolen power burning in his veins. The wolf they created fights the dragon he never wanted to be, but he has no other choice if his plan is to succeed. There is only one road to victory. Every choice he's made for himself has cost him more than he gained.

"They frolic among the spirits, these creatures in cages of flesh. Wisdom, Curiosity, and Contemplation observe and comment on their every move. One spirit follows at a distance, entranced by their laughter and vivaciousness," Cole whispers into the thick silence. "They call themselves Evanuris. One among them offers it a way to join them."

"It is a trap, set by one who knew more than she revealed. Her regret turns me; twists me," the demon continues, crouching low; posture uncertain whether it should relax or prepare to leap. "I am no longer what I was meant to be. A goddess regrets the necessity of her actions. I am the regret of a god, of all the gods, of those who would be gods."

"What are they talking about?" Varric asks. His voice is calm, steady, and it is obvious the dwarf is not fully aware of what they face.

"You can hear, but not see what is happening?" Solas inquires, glad for the excuse to turn his attention away from the spiritual battle before him.

The hands on his shoulders briefly lift as Varric shrugs. "Just Cole talking to a wall of black mist again."

"Ah."

"You haven't answered my question."

"No."

The dwarf snorts. "I'll remember this when I'm writing the next Fen'Harel myth."

Solas groans. "Please don't."

"The slow arrow. Always too slow, too late, not enough. 'Kill the king's other daughter' they say in my voice. Perhaps I deserve all the infamy they have gifted me. I am the reason they are lessened, weak, hollow. I destroy every beautiful thing I have ever touched." The demon closes its scarlet eyes, turning its head away from them.