#soul parent

[sunnypaganblog]

I love Lady Aphrodite sm hdjdjd best mom everrrrr/pos

I love Venus Day so much!! It feels like getting to spend a day with my mom somehow hehdbdn

[sunny6677]

Lady Aphrodite appreciation!!

I took a bath in Lady Aphrodite's honor to cleanse myself, and because I felt like I needed to. Perhaps because of all the Venus Day videos I received involving baths. And as I took it, I played a worship playlist in honor of her. I reflected over the ways I feel about my face, and how I long to have a face like Marilyn Monroe, and how I wish I looked only a little bit like her. Yet as I looked over my body, I saw only perfection, and I saw the beauty in my curves. The beauty in my waist. The beauty in my chest. The beauty in my legs. The beauty in my slender arms. The beauty in my darkish brown hair so dark it looks like the night sky/like ebony. I felt the calmness of her presence. The way the calmness of her presence made me feel more inclined to love. To loving myself. To appreciating the beauty around me. To appreciating the beauty in others.

And once I finished bathing, I got a good look at myself in the mirror. I saw the round shape of my face, but the firm jaw structure I held. I saw the paleness of my skin. I saw my freckles. I saw how my brown eyes glittered like a crystal. I saw the shape of my lips. I saw the way my glasses made me look. And how the wetness of my hair made my curls spring up. And in that moment, I felt love for myself. Love for my beauty.

I thank Lady Aphrodite. I thank Lady Aphrodite for her presence, for her beauty, her grace, and her love. And her ability to make me see past any judgement I have of myself. I love her so much.

I love my soul mother, so, so much. I love her as my mother, and I love her as my dear godess.

[sunny6677]

Figured I'd place some of my relationships with my deities as of right now here, for future context of any future posts I do lmao

Hecate - My mentor. Apparently she was my teacher/mentor/guide in a past life?? I found that out for a recent reading anyway. Either way, I suppose that's a good thing because I've always felt a calling to witchcraft and would like to learn it.

Hermes - My soul father!!/pos

Aphrodite - My soul mother!!/pos

Lady Isis - My soul mother!!/pos

Lord Thor - My soul father! I haven't spoken with him yet tho

Apollo - Kinda like an uncle figure and brother figure to me at the same time?? I see him more like a brother though. I've also known him as long as I've known Aphrodite, so I'm more laid-back/close with him.

Eros - ...tbh I haven't spoken to him yet? But due to me being connected to Aphrodite, I see him as a sibling even though he's not lmao. Same with Hermaphrodite (since I've heard they're a deity too), and every kid Aphrodite and Hermes has. I see basically everyone my soul parents are related to as my siblings or connected to me even if they aren't really lmao.

Zeus - A mild dad figure in the few times I've spoken to him lol. More like a deeply respected figure of mine though.

Odysseus - Also a mild dad figure!! He's been pretty fatherly in the few times I've talked to him anyway lmao.

Lord Ares - A mentor figure to me whom I really don't wanna dissapoint or wanna do my best for/lh

Lord Hades - Also one of my mentors!!/lh

Lady Lillith - Both as a mentor and mom figure—like a strict and protective but supportive mom to me hehehe

If there's more that I remember, I'll reblog this jdnsns

[sunnypaganblog]

Nightly reflection in honor of Lord Hermes!!

I'm not going to be who I was in the past. I won't tolerate manipulation, bad circumstances, or things that I simply can't handle. I won't let anyone walk all over me ever again. I won't fix someone who I can't fix. I'm not going to let people trigger me or traumatize me. I'm going to fight through any obstacle that comes my way, and make it out of life. And I'll do it. For Lord Hermes. For Lady Hecate. For Lady Isis. For Lord Apollo. For Lord Ares. For King Zeus. For Lady Hera. For Lady Aphrodite. For Queen Lillith. For every deity, and hero I worship. I'll do it for them. I'll do it for all of them. And I'll be a person so unrecognizable, that some will forget who I was before. I will persevere, and make it through. I'm strong. And I've got this.

Thank you, Lord Hermes, for your advice, and for your guidance. Thank you, Lady Hecate, Lady Isis, and all my other deities for your guidance as well.

[sunnypaganblog]

Nightly reflection in honor of Lord Hermes!!

I really need to have more of a backbone and set my boundaries more, especially with those I care about. Sometimes I don't say anything even when they've made me uncomfortable, or find it hard to speak up against them when I find something they said wrong or offensive. I'm around the wrong people in real life, and I know only I have the power to get rid of them if I genuinely think they're harmful to me. I need to overcome my fears. And my anxieties. I need to stop going quiet. And I need to fully commit to this even if it's hard. I'm mainly afraid of what'll happen, but if it's needed to convince myself I really don't care what happens one way or anoth er, then I'll do it. For my deities—for all of them. For Lord Hermes. For Lord Ares. For Lady Hecate, and every one that has been at my side. I won't say this just because I feel confident at the moment. I am going to be confident in myself. And I will speak when I feel I've been wronged. I will speak when I think something is wrong. I won't be silent any longer. And I'm serious. /srs

Lord Ares, Lord Hermes, Lady Hecate—guide me, however I may struggle. I will attempt to overcome this challenge on my own, but I recognize the possibility of me giving in is inevitable, and I may need a push, so should anything happen, I ask to please give me a boost of confidence, or to help me channel my anger enough to stand up for myself. And to help me be stronger than I've ever known. I thank you for all the ways you've helped me, and for helping me realize this, and for what point I may reach at the end of this journey of mine. Thank you for being here with me, and for listening to me.

[sunnypaganblog]

My usual nightly reflection!! Advised by Lady Isis this time (I think).

Tonight is the night I think I'll try to stop my obsessive habits. I've been obsessing over my mistakes a lot lately, and rather than thinking if says to improve of simply letting it go, I've been dragging myself down into a pool of endless self-loathing. It isn't doing me any good. So, while it's going to be hard, I'm going to try stopping my bad habits and overcome my mental issues. And perhaps I'll start this by simply not acknowledging whatever mistake I'm thinking of anytime it pops into my brain, opening up when I start to feel guilty, or reminding myself that I can change and be a better person rather than sit around and hate myself for things that were in the past. I'm going to try healing from this mindset, because it clearly isn't doing me any good, and is just stressing me out. And I think my deities and Lady Isis for pointing it out to me.

I'm going to also try stopping myself from fearing the judgement of others too, especially with how much of an outcast I feel like for my different ways of worship compared to other Pagans online. I keep fearing whether or not I'm doing the right thing, or if I should keep doing this, or if my deities are even around or even like the casual relationship we have. When I should really be letting myself know that my relationship with my deities is my own relationship, and something that others can't change just because they don't understand or see it as something different from their own experiences with paganism. I need to become more comfortable in my own skin. And I think I'll do that by asking Queen Lillith for advice on how to feel more comfortable with myself tomorrow. Or I'll at least ask her if she'd like to do an advice tarot spread.

I thank all of my deities for helping me realize my bad habits. Seriously. I really have a lot of things I need to work on.

[sunnypaganblog]

Reflection thing for tonight under request of Lord Hermes!!

So Hermes is fully committing to the whole caregiver thing jrndndn. But I feel very content with it tbh. I haven't felt this safe in a while. Of course, he's a deity, so he can't 'take care of me' in a regular way. But he basically took care if me by reminding me to do things or instructing me on certain things, and even picked a new morning and night routine for me that he thought would be healthier/more helpful since I agreed to the whole him caring for me thing (tbh I've kinda needed a caregiver for a while now with how lonely I am and just how much I struggle to do simple tasks so this will be quite helpful—unsure of how long he's gonna take care of me for, but I'll appreciate it while it lasts anyway.

I'm still kinda anxious deep down about this since again I haven't seen other Pagans need their deity to help them take care of themself or just take care of them in general. I feel a bit like an odd one out. But at the same time, this really does feel like something I've always needed, and something that makes me feel content and fulfilled in a way. Satisfied, even. I know I am old enough to take care of myself, but I struggle with it so much sometimes that I just need help—especially because I'm autistic and struggle with basic self care anyway or reminding myself to do healthier things.

Regardless, I really appreciate him for doing this. We love Lord Hermes in this household!!! My father realll!/p/lh

[sunnypaganblog]

My usual reflection thing for tonight—this time advised by Lord Apollon!

Soooooo.. uh, I'm not sure if any other people have deities as 'caregivers'—but I think Lord Hermes just agreed to be mine today? To be honest, I've been kinda needing one for a while now. It feels like I simply can't do things on my own or take care of myself due to all the problems I have and just how stressful things have been lately and how in need of care I've been due to all the terrible things I've seen online. As in caregiver, I just mean a person who takes care of someone, and that he also agreed to be my caregiver for when I regress jdndns

Either way, I wasn't expecting this. And I'm very sure he agreed since I confirmed it through tarot. (Though then again, this was after I jokingly asked if all deities were interested in being my caregiver the more I thought about trying to find a caregiver, and in response, I basically got a 'yes'—I'm still unsure if Hermes meant that as a joke or if he was being dead serious 😭 Probably serious in all honesty with how nice most deities have been with me). At the same time, I feel a bit.. odd about it? I mean I don't mind it—don't get me wrong. I already deeply appreciate his role as my father and as one of my God's. I just can't help but feel slightly guilty for 'making him take care of me', and I also feel a bit lost or slightly outcast since I haven't seen other Pagans with a relationship like this to their deities. Tbh, I'm unsure of how a 'caregiver' dynamic with him is going to work, but I suppose I'll have to see. I asked if he could communicate certain things with me through gut feelings or thoughts, so perhaps it'll be through that somehow. I think I just feel 'weird' because of past experiences describing my own experiences to other Pagans, only to either be told I was doing something wrong or passive aggressively spoken down to like I was intentionally trying to sound like a fool. It might help if I see someone with a similar relationship but idk jdjd I have to keep reminding myself that Tumblr is a little more chill when it comes to things like these.

Either way, I am actually happy about this since I think things will be easier for me or get better for me. And tomorrow is my day of worship for him, so with him as my caregiver now, I can't help but wonder if tomorrow will be any different. It makes me a little excited tbh jdjdnd.

That is all I have to say for tonight though—