Humans Are Boring Space Orcs
As much as I adore all the “Humans are space orcs” posts, how has nobody come up with the idea that we’re the comparatively boring ones and most other species have incredibly complex cultures
Just imagine planets known for having orchestras composed of 246 different instruments, galaxies that have colors we never could have imagined ourselves, and Space food made with Weird Space Spices that tastes so freaking good and you can only get in Space
Imagine that, because other species have had interplanetary contact for so much longer than humans, that all their cultures have mixed together in one great Space Melting Pot and there’s a planet that’s basically Space NYC where all of it combines together to create one big Space Culture with everything from the biggest Space Art Museums ever to Kashyyyktown and Little Vulcan
Picture the Space Renaissance, with sculptors who use Space Stone and sculptors who use holograms instead of physical material. Painters who create landscape paintings that make up whole valleys that you have to use Space VR to look at. Interior design that combines popular styles from various planetary systems in order to create one Ultimate Space Decorating Style
And by the time that humans get to space and join everyone else, and ask, “Hey, did anyone ever pick up the stuff we sent with Voyager 1?” and it turns out that Beethoven, Mozart, Bach, and Chuck Berry are all intergalactically loved, and Space Teens have Cool Space Ringtones like “Wild Dog” and “Train”
And to us as a species we seem pretty boring, but over time it becomes clear that every species feels that way (except for the especially pretentious and snobby ones), but really all Space Culture is Space Cool and eventually it all melds together and no one knows or cares whether the Beatles were from Earth or if they were from Mars, cause everyone at least know they came from our solar system and that they’re one of the greatest bands of all time, and that’s what really matters
