Tai;
we don’t create enough - constantly caught in some hither-tither to-do about, what if someone doesn’t like it? worse, what if someone doesn’t care? what if someone doesn’t think our perspective, our art, our words, our being are worth the space they take up?
and it’s such a bizarre “what if” to be caught in, so utterly bizarre, because we know without question that there are thousands - probably even hundred thousands or a million or more that literally without even slightly knowing us condemn us as a waste of space.
like, a short list: we’re Disabled, mentally and physically, and chronically ill. we’re neurodiverse, and we’re crazy. we’re Jewish, and mixed. we’re fat and Queer, intersex and non-binary trans. we’re Survivors. Hashem’s sake, we’re a we.
there has literally never been a day in our entire lives in this body that we have not heard, seen, felt, or otherwise been privy to hate for us and hate for those like us - the “opinion”, in words or actions, that we don’t deserve to exist. that we don’t deserve to have our own perspectives. that we don’t deserve the space we take up.
and we’re tired of it, alright? we’re tired of people we love dying because people don’t think they’re worth the space they take up, because, say, for an entirely not random example: they’re Disabled and Trans, and don’t fit in people’s preconceived notions of “A Good Person” because of their Lack of Shame about those qualities of self - even when that person is a Revolutionary saving at least Thousands of lives, and inspiring Thousands and Thousands more -
and when we say ‘even’, we actually mean ‘especially’, because Hashem knows the people who defend the status quo of Harm or Be Harmed especially go after those who share, open and proud, that they need not be ashamed for existing - that others need not be ashamed for existing - that the way we are is okay, that only we can determine and define our own experiences, and that pushing back against people who hurt us is just and good, not reason for condemnation.
Tai..... we miss you. oh, Tai,we’re full of such rage and such sorrow, and we promise to use it to keep working for a better tomorrow;
Tai, we wish you were still here, in body; but we know you’re still here in soul, because you’re here in ours, so strongly; we can mark and see so many of your influences on the stories we live, in so many positive ways - and we know we’re not alone in that.
we’re not anywhere near alone in that.
we promise to keep spreading this knowledge, that we need not apologize for our existences, that we can be proud of the ways we don’t fit in neat norms, that our health and safety and well-being comes before the preconceived notions and boxes in others’ minds.
Life is messy, and that’s okay. but it’s not okay you’re gone so soon - it’s not okay all the ways people in this world hurt you. we promise to keep your memory alive, as best as we possibly can. It’s both the least and most we can do.
[A memorial poem for @crpl-pnk, a dear friend of ours. May they be free, and soon in very little, if any, pain.]
