Summary: Starry spends the majority of her life feeling lonely until one day a mysterious girl named Anna appears in her town. The two quickly become close but Starry soon realizes that there’s more to Anna than meets the eye.
Four part story. Each part is inspired by a different song.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3
Word Count: ~3.2K
Lyrics from "If You Can't Hang" by Sleeping With Sirens.
You’re the lowest type
I ran away as fast as I could, kicking up sand behind me. Eventually my legs couldn’t keep up with my panic and sorrow and I fell to my knees again. I toppled over, arms tightly wrapped around my stomach, tears warping my vision. I was heaving, my lungs desperately fighting for the air that had been knocked out of my chest.
When the world finally stopped spinning, I glanced behind me, wondering if she still cared enough to chase after me. All I saw was a barren beach with only my own footprints in the sand.
I wailed out into the night, allowing myself to be as loud as I could. No one was around to hear me anyway. Especially not Anna. She was probably still with her friends, dancing and laughing as if I didn’t exist at all.
My cries echoed back at me, the sound mirroring how I felt inside. In that moment I was the only person in the entire world, alone, afraid, and in so much pain. There was no one around to care or to even know that I existed. The beach, the ocean, the cosmos, it was all empty and meaningless. Time didn’t make sense anymore. It felt like I’d been kneeling there for hours.
I let myself cry until my voice went hoarse and my eyes dried of tears completely. There was nothing left in me and I just barely had the strength to walk to the stairs and sit on the boardwalk. No one was around, it was far too late for anyone to be out. I laid back on the soft wood, staring blankly up at the stars.
It was starting to feel like I wasn’t supposed to be on the earth. Maybe my true home was up there, with the stars as my brothers and sisters. Maybe that was why I was so excruciatingly lonely.
Stay the hell away while I sit here by myself
I looked over my shoulder when I felt a presence behind me. It was Anna. She was slowly approaching me, as composed as ever. A stark contrast to the state I was in.
“Are you okay, Starry?”
“Why?” I asked.
Anna didn’t respond. She just stared at me. For the first time since I met her, I had no idea what expression she was making under that mask. She felt like a stranger to me.
“Why did you kiss him?” I demanded.
Anna looked down. Her posture was shameful but it felt disingenuous.
“Fang and I are to be married,” Anna explained.
I looked away from Anna, squeezing my eyes shut. “You didn’t tell me.”
“I did not know how to,” Anna said. “I thought it would upset you.”
I shook my head. I couldn’t bring myself to believe a word she was saying. If she was so afraid of upsetting me then she wouldn’t have kissed him in front of me. There was obviously a different reason why she failed to tell me. I was at the end of my rope though. I decided that I didn’t care enough to know the real reason. I just wanted to go home, to get away from Anna and her friends.
Anna took a few steps closer to me and reached out to touch my shoulder. The second I felt her hand on me I pushed it away.
“Don’t touch me,” I insisted.
“Starry… I’m sorry,” Anna said. Her voice had a strange tone that I’d never heard her use before. It sounded desperate, like she was pleading with me. There was no remorse in it though.
“Just leave me alone!” I shouted. My cry seemed to startle Anna and she stepped back.
Anger clouding my sadness, I rose to my feet and looked in the direction of my house. I wanted to go home. I wanted to sleep and never wake up.
“Starry…” Anna trailed off.
I didn’t want her to say my name anymore. It hurt too much.
“I thought we were in love,” I said.
“We are,” Anna replied.
I shook my head. “No. People who are in love don’t keep secrets from each other.”
Something hit the sand behind me with a thump and I glanced back to look. I saw Anna’s mask discarded on the ground. The friendly smile on the cat’s face had turned into a taunting grin.
You’re such a pretty face
I turned around and was met with Anna’s beautiful face staring sadly at me.
“Please don’t go,” she begged. “Come back with me.”
“I can’t. It hurts too much.” I had to look away from Anna. The fairness of her face seemed to be drawing me back in. It made me want to just run into her arms, but I knew that all I would find there was more pain. “Please just forget about me, Anna.”
I turned around and ran in the direction of my house. I never even chanced a glance back, not wanting to think about what I was leaving behind. I just needed to sleep. To fall unconscious for a while. To stop thinking about it.
~~~
The next morning, I went to Ramona’s house. I wasn’t sure why I went there. My legs seemed to just move on their own accord, taking me to her doorstep. I knocked on the door, hoping someone would be home.
Ramona opened the door and immediately looked concerned. “Starry? Have you been crying?” She placed a hand on my reddened, tear-stained cheeks. Her thumb softly slid back and forth under my eye.
I simply nodded, trying to find the words I knew I needed to say to her.
Ramona didn’t question me further. Instead, she invited me inside and offered me tea.
We went up to Ramona’s room and sat on her bed. I noticed that her workbench had something on it that was covered by a thin blanket. I wondered what it was but I never asked about it. I was finding it difficult to speak.
Ramona sat next to me while I drank my tea. She didn’t say anything, waiting until I was ready to speak.
I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror on Ramona’s wall. I was still wearing my clothes from the previous night and my hair, despite being much shorter, was a tangled mess. I could hardly recognize myself. I looked like a sad mockery of Anna, my old identity completely wiped away.
After a while, Ramona started to draw on my back with her finger. She drew a variety of different shapes. A moon, a flower, a tree. My body tensed up when she started drawing a rounded shape with cat ears at the top. Ramona noticed immediately and stopped drawing it. Instead, she started to write a message.
Was it Anna?
I burst into tears as she finished drawing the question mark. “Yes,” I said through my sobs.
Ramona took the teacup from my hand and placed it on the side table. She then wrapped her arms around me and I leaned into her embrace. Ramona gently brushed her fingers through my hair, trying to calm me down.
“I’m sorry!” I cried into her shoulder.
“Hm?”
“I’m sorry for not spending time with you. For abandoning you,” I explained. My voice hitched a couple times as I tried to get my thoughts out.
Ramona pulled away to look me in the eye. She kept her hands on my shoulders, warm and comforting.
“It’s okay,” she said solemnly. Her eyes flicked away from me for a moment. “You were in love with Anna, weren’t you?”
“I thought I was,” I admitted.
Ramona gave me a questioning look. I knew she wanted me to tell her what happened, but I didn’t want to talk about it. I just wanted to forget about Anna. I wanted to forget about how happy she made me feel. The loneliness that plagued me came back and it was made so much worse knowing what life was like without it.
“She lied to me,” was all I could say to Ramona. What happened between Anna and I didn’t matter. What mattered was that I had left my best friend behind for the sake of someone who deceived me. For a girl who didn’t care about me the way I thought she did.
After some more crying, I asked Ramona if she could read me a book. Ramona nodded and picked up a book that was on the floor underneath her side table. It was one that I had never seen before. Ramona explained that she got it recently and wanted to read it to me.
I laid down on the bed and closed my eyes as Ramona started to read out loud.
The story was about a sailor who got lost at sea on a fishing trip. All he wanted to do was get back home to his wife, so he started to make a map for himself using the stars. Eventually, after months of sailing aimlessly through the ocean and nearly starving to death, he managed to get back to his home island and reunite with his wife. She had waited patiently for him to return, knowing in her heart that he would come back one day.
I thought it was an incredibly sweet story with the twist of adventure that Ramona and I both liked in a book. It kind of made me wonder how long Ramona would have waited for me to come back to her. I wondered if the book had given her hope that I would return. I was too afraid to ask though.
It took us nearly the whole day to get through the book. We stopped a few times to eat lunch and make more tea. When we finally got to the end it was dinner time.
Ramona’s parents made extra dinner for me. They asked where I had been but Ramona told them that I didn’t want to talk about it. It was so kind of her. Part of me felt like I didn’t deserve her kindness or her forgiveness. Ramona offered it to me without hesitation though.
~~~
That night, I left Ramona’s house alone. She said she needed to finish something that she was working on. I didn’t question it, I had been there all day anyway.
Instead of going home, I went to the boardwalk. I didn’t plan on spending much time there, my parents would be expecting home soon. I just wanted to see the stars above the sea. They looked the prettiest when they were shining down on the water.
I arrived at the edge of the boardwalk and sat down. I let my legs hang over the water but still sat behind the chain, of course.
The horizon was just barely visible in the dark of the night, but I could still see it. I stared out, half-expecting to see another ghost ship. After a long while though, I never saw anything except for the line where the sea met the sky.
It was getting late, I knew I had to return home so as not to make my mom worry. With a sigh, I lifted my legs bag onto the boardwalk and stood up. I took one last look at the sky before going.
To my shock, there was something there. It was moving fast and I could quickly make out its shape. A ship.
I watched in awe as the ship drew closer to the shore at an impossibly fast speed. I soon noticed a figure standing at the bow. It was a young girl with a dress like the one I was wearing. My heart nearly stopped when I saw her white cat mask.
Anna looked at me. I hardly recognized her. She looked just as mysterious as the night I met her. A stranger aboard a ghost ship.
I never thought you’d stay, that’s okay
Anna raised her hand and waved at me. It was a slow, solemn wave. The type that was reserved for permanent goodbyes. For some reason, I waved back.
Even though I wanted Anna to stay with me forever, deep down I knew that we would have to say goodbye eventually. I had no idea that it would be so soon though.
So, despite feeling like my heart was being ripped from my chest, I waved goodbye to her. I smiled as a tear rolled down my cheek. Anna brought her hand to the mouth of her mask and made a motion like she was blowing a kiss towards me. Somehow, I knew she was smiling back at me.
Feeling strangely content, I stood up, prepared to go back home. When I turned around though, I missed my footing and the safety chain got caught on my ankle. Fear struck me when I realized that I could trip. Then the panic came. The same panic I saw in my mother’s eyes when she tried to watch me swim.
Unable to think straight, I reflexively pulled my foot towards me. I just wanted it to be back on solid ground, but the opposite happened. I wobbled sporadically until I flipped over the side of the pier, landing headfirst in the deep blue water. While I was under, I heard the splash that the rest of my body made.
I couldn’t get myself to open my eyes. I had no idea which way was up and which way was down. I felt as if I were floating out in space. There is no up or down in space, just endless abyss in all directions. It was almost calming to think about.
But I wasn’t in space. I had to remind myself of that. I was underwater where I could easily drown if I didn’t act fast. Drown. Just like those kids the elders always talked about. I didn’t want to end up like them. I just wanted to be back home with my parents. I had to get back to them.
I was all alone though. It was silent underwater. No sounds of swimming, no sign of someone, of Anna, jumping into the water to rescue me. No one was coming to help me. No one except for her even knew where I was. She was safe up there on the boat while I was in danger.
I began to notice a low, muted ache in my chest that was slowly growing stronger. My lungs were searching for air. If I didn’t move soon, I would begin to suffocate. That thought alone seemed to bring me to my senses. I couldn’t just wait around for Anna to come help me, I had to surface on my own.
Bravely, I opened my eyes. Above me was darkness and below me was moonlight. I was still upside down. It would be a long way back up if I had been sinking that whole time. I wasn’t even sure if I could make it, but I had to try. My life depended on it.
Remembering my swimming lessons, I kicked my feet to propel myself and used my arms to turn myself right-side-up. It took longer than I expected, but eventually I saw the moonlight above me. I followed the light, kicking as hard as I could. The pain in my chest was quickly becoming unbearable but I just kept moving no matter what.
I began to wonder how far I was from the surface. There couldn’t have been much left but the exhaustion was taking over. Still, I urged myself to keep going. To ignore the pain and just make it back to the surface.
And then the cold night air surrounded me. It chilled me as the wind hit the water on my face. I opened my mouth and gasped for air. I had never been so thankful to breathe in my entire life. The oxygen filled my lungs, easing the pain.
I looked around and realized that Anna’s ship was gone. I was alone under the stars but for some reason, it felt nice. I wasn’t lonely, just simply alone. There was no sadness in it.
Despite almost drowning I felt a strong sense of serenity. As I swam back towards the dock, I knew that everything was going to be okay.
~~~
It took me a long time to walk back home. I was moving slowly and I kept stopping to think. The past few weeks were feeling more and more like a dream with each passing minute. I would never know where Anna came from or where she would end up next. I would never know if she truly loved me and I knew that I would never see her again.
Although it caused a sinking, empty feeling in my chest, thinking about that came with a sense of relief. I still believe that if ever got an explanation for what happened when Anna was there, it would make everything so much worse. I think I’m better off not knowing the answers. I just remember how it felt and that’s all I need.
When I finally returned to my house, I found Ramona sitting on the front step, holding something in her hands.
“There you are,” she said, standing up.
“I was at the boardwalk,” I explained. “What are you doing here?”
“I wanted to give you this.” Ramona held out the object towards me.
I took it from her and inspected it. I immediately recognized that the top part of it was the glass star map that she bought from the market when I was with her. It was attached to a strange contraption that had what looked like a light on it.
“It’s the star map?” I said, unsure of myself.
“I made it into a night light,” Ramona explained. “I know you hate when it storms and you can’t go outside to see the stars. With this you’ll be able to see them every night.”
I gasped and felt tears start to well up in my eyes. Ramona made the contraption just for me. She knew that the stars made me feel less lonely. She was trying to help ease that feeling. At that exact moment, I felt the heavy weight of loneliness lift off of me, the same way that it did when I met Anna.
Unable to put my gratitude into words, I leapt forward to hug Ramona. I tried to say “thank you” but it came out in hiccups as I cried from joy.
Ramona understood what I was trying to say and rubbed my back. “Anything for you, Starry.”
Would you please stay and come inside?
I asked Ramona if she could sleep over and she happily agreed. We went up to my room and tested out the new night light. We laid side by side on my bed and gazed up at the ceiling. Ramona attached the sphere in a way that it could be turned around in a couple different directions. We took turns spinning to different parts of the map and pointed out the constellations to each other.
After a while, we both got tired and decided to go to sleep. We tucked ourselves into bed like we usually did and I suddenly realized how much I missed falling asleep next to Ramona.
Once we were settled in, Ramona turned onto her side and wrapped her arms around me. I was shocked at first but it felt comforting. We had cuddled before, but not quite like this.
“I’m sorry about what happened with Anna,” Ramona whispered.
“I’ll be okay,” I replied.
“Are you sure?”
“Mhm.”
“But what about your loneliness?”
I shifted a bit, craning my neck to look back at Ramona. “It went away again,” I said.
Summary: Starry spends the majority of her life feeling lonely until one day a mysterious girl named Anna appears in her town. The two quickly become close but Starry soon realizes that there’s more to Anna than meets the eye.
Four part story. Each part is inspired by a different song.
Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4
Word Count: ~4.4K
Song lyrics from "Anna Molly" by Incubus.
A cloud hangs over this city by the sea
I sat on the edge of the boardwalk, behind the chains of course. I wasn’t allowed to go too close to the water unsupervised lest I fall in. Of course I knew how to swim, it comes with living next to the water, but there were too many horror stories of kids drowning in the ocean and my parents were worried.
So instead, I just sat and listened to the waves as they were pushed and pulled by the moon’s authority. The peace of the night was the best time to listen to them since there were almost no other sounds. It was also the perfect time to look at the stars. Most of the town’s lights were out, save for a couple street lamps, leaving just the cosmos to shine their brightest.
A chilly night breeze swept across my arms and I shivered. I pulled my shawl higher over my shoulders, squeezing the soft fabric around me for warmth. I knew it was getting late and that I should head back home soon but I really didn’t want to. Nightfall always made me feel better, the stars and anchored ships were good company. As soon as I got back to my room I would have to just stare at the ceiling while I fought with my emotions just to get some sleep.
I squeezed my eyes shut as I felt that familiar pang in my chest.
I watch the ships pass and wonder if she might be out there and sober as well from loneliness
An unexplained loneliness had followed me around for my entire life. Sure, I had a close friend and my parents loved me but those things only helped a little. I always felt like I was only half of a person, incomplete, missing some part of me that I would never find.
Finding my other half, if they even existed, felt impossible since I lived in a small, isolated town. We were on a jungle island off the coast of Esalezia and the only way to and from the town was by boat. We rarely got visitors either, most of the world didn’t even know our town existed. In turn, we didn’t know much about the world outside of the island. All we knew was what the sailors would tell us when they stopped by to get supplies.
My connections with my neighbors were weak and superficial. The only relationships I had that actually made me feel genuine closeness and comfort were with my parents and my best friend Ramona.
“I knew you’d be here.” Speaking of Ramona, I heard her harmonious voice behind me and I looked over to see her. She smiled when our eyes met and stepped closer to me. “Your parents sent me. It’s getting late,” she said softly.
“Just five more minutes,” I negotiated.
Ramona smiled again and sat down beside me, leaning back on her palms. She didn’t say anything, letting me listen to the serene sounds of the ocean. Out of everyone I knew, I think Ramona was the only person who could at least somewhat understand me. She was two years older than me, (lucky her, she’d already hit her growth spurt) so I often came to her for advice.
I felt like I couldn’t ask my parents for advice since they were adults. It seemed like they couldn’t remember what being a kid was like at all so they had no idea how I felt. Ramona was still a kid like me so she knew how hard it could be.
“Do you think the ocean would help me if she could?”
“Oh Starry, are you feeling lonely again?”
I’m always lonely, I thought. I didn’t answer Ramona’s questions, she already knew the answer.
“I think the ocean can help you. Have you tried asking her?” Ramona’s suggestion confused me. I didn’t know that you could ask the ocean for help. I thought that would somehow be out of line. To me, the ocean was a powerful being, multitudes larger than my world, the tiny island that I’d spent my whole life on. I felt it wasn’t my place to burden her with my problems.
We sat in the quiet night air for a bit longer and I knew we would have to go back soon. I looked out onto the dark sea horizon, wanting to lose myself in it just one more time that night. I stared unblinking, letting myself forget where I was for a moment.
A shape started to form in the obscurity. It was round on the bottom like a hull and the top was tall and pointy. As my eyes focused, a large sail came into view. A ship? There weren’t supposed to be any ships out at that time of night.
“What is that?” I asked.
“What’s what?” Ramona replied. I turned to look at her and was met with a confused expression.
“There’s a ship out there.”
“Where?”
“There..” I pointed in the direction that I saw the figure but when I looked back nothing was there. Just the blackened water that stretched on for miles.
Baffled, I stood up and scanned the port but there was still nothing. Ramona rose to her feet as well and joined me in looking around. She squinted her eyes and craned her neck to see better.
“I swear I saw one on the horizon,” I told her, hoping she would believe me.
“Maybe it was a ghost ship.”
I furrowed my brow and adjusted my shawl. Ramona put her hand on my shoulder and suggested we go home. As much as I wanted to argue, I was getting tired. I thought that maybe sleep would be good for me, especially if I was seeing ghosts. I had one more selfish request though.
“Okay, but can you sleep in my room tonight?”
Ramona simply smiled and nodded before leading the way back to my house.
~~~
I couldn’t get the image of that ghostly ship out of my mind. The mysterious silhouette haunted my dreams that night, eerily watching me from a distance. For some reason I felt like it appeared there for me specifically and I couldn’t tell whether it was a generous gift or a dark omen.
The fact that Ramona didn’t see it bothered me too. My vision has always been a bit blurry and unreliable. I could still see, just not as well as my peers. If there was a ship out there, Ramona would have seen it for sure. It just didn’t make sense.
Whatever it was, it had to have been sent to me by the ocean. I’d heard the tales of those who received presents granted by the sea. The bestowals were always a double-edged sword, meant to reward the pure of heart and teach lessons to the selfish. The ocean was never the entity to decide if the gift would be good or bad, that was up to the recipient.
But those were all just stories that served as warnings for people who had bad intentions or evil in their hearts. I didn’t personally know anyone who had received something from the ocean. It was all just a myth that my childish naivety persuaded me to believe in.
Still, I couldn’t help but wonder. I always believed that anything was possible, so maybe the stories had some truth to them.
~~~
Ramona and I went to the market together the next day. My mom gave us money to buy some fruits and vegetables, as well as a little extra in case we found something we liked there. Ramona enjoyed collecting trinkets and crystals and the market was a good place to find that type of thing. She preferred stumbling across them out in the jungle but that didn’t happen often. So she usually settled for just purchasing them.
Once we got what we came for, we walked over to the handcrafted section. We went to Ramona’s favorite stall and looked through the merchandise. The man who worked at the stall knew us well and offered to show Ramona his newest items.
There were a few eye-catching items. A decorated rabbit skull that served as a candle holder, a supposedly haunted compass, a pocket knife made out of three different types of metal, among other things. Ramona didn’t seem interested in most of the wares though. She told the man that she was looking for “something special”, whatever that meant.
The man smiled at her and told us to wait a moment. He disappeared behind the stall’s curtain and then reappeared holding a small black box with a skull and crossbone emblem on the top. The emblem was made of some type of metal that appeared to be worn down from years of life’s erosion. He explained that the box was found on an abandoned pirate ship. He slowly lifted the lid to reveal a navy blue glass sphere that was covered with white specks.
I saw Ramona’s eyes light up with intrigue as she gazed upon the globe. The man explained to us that it was a star map that could show you the entire cosmos when held above a light.
Ramona was sold on it and she spent the rest of our money on the little treasure. I didn’t mind of course, there was nothing at the market that I wanted to buy anyway.
~~~
A cloud hangs over and mutes my happiness
I felt a wave of sadness wash over me as we left the marketplace. Gloomy clouds occupied the sky, blocking out the sunlight along with any chance I had of being in a good mood.
Winter is the worst time of year. It was always storming or windy on the island during that season and it got cold at night. The season’s only saving grace was the fact that it got dark out early which made most of the townsfolk retire to their houses sooner than they did in the summer. That way I could stay outside with the ocean and the stars for longer before I eventually had to go home.
I wasn’t allowed to go out if it was storming though. My parents were scared that something bad might happen to me if I did. They were right, the winter storms were dangerous, but I still hated having to stay in my room all night.
It looked like it was going to storm that night, which was unfortunate. I wanted to see if the ghost ship might reappear. I thought maybe if I went back to the same spot at the same time, the mysterious figure might reveal itself to me again.
“Are you sure you didn’t see a ship last night?” I asked.
“Positive,” Ramona answered. “I believe you saw it though.”
“You don’t think I was just seeing things? I mean, you know I can’t see very well.”
Ramona shrugged. “Is that what a ghost ship is? A hallucination?”
“I don’t know.” No one really knew what caused ghost ships to manifest. Some said they were hallucinations, others claimed they were a sign from worlds unknown to us. Some people even believed that they were evil. Bad omens meant to lure fools into the blue depths, never to be seen again.
A thousand ships couldn’t sail me back from distress
~~~
Romana and I spent the rest of the day in my room, waiting until nightfall so we could test out her new trinket. We didn’t do much while we waited. Ramona read me a couple chapters from one of my books but that was about it.
At sunset I sat on the edge of my bed and stared out the window while Ramona mindlessly drew shapes on my back with her finger. It was a game we played that both of us had gotten quite good at. Ramona would draw a picture on me and I would visualize it in my head and tell her what I saw. I got it right most of the time. In fact, we’d become so good at our little game that Ramona could write me secret messages on my skin. Small exchanges that only the two of us would ever know about.
On that particular night, Ramona was drawing a ship on my back. She must have been thinking about the apparition I saw the previous night, though she wouldn’t admit it out loud.
As the sun slowly disappeared behind the horizon, Ramona’s drawing gradually became more detailed in my head. I wondered if the ship might have looked like that. I’d only seen the outline of it so it was hard to say.
Ramona stopped as soon as the sun was out of sight and got up off the bed. She walked over to my dresser at the front of the room and picked up the box that supposedly belonged to some adventurous pirates.
“Where’s your flashlight?” she asked as she opened the small black container.
I hopped off the bed and kneeled on the floor, reaching under my bed frame. I pushed past the myriad of my belongings that I kept underneath there and pulled out the flashlight.
Ramona sat back down on the mattress and I joined her. She instructed me to point the light at the ceiling while she held the mysterious glass sphere above it.
When the light hit the navy blue orb, it shone through the white specks and projected an image of the night sky on the ceiling. The two of us stared up at the display in awe. It almost felt like we were actually outside under the stars.
“It’s beautiful,” Ramona said.
“It is,” I agreed.
Ramona slowly turned the sphere, creating a new image with different constellations. I saw many that I recognized and they were all in the right spots. It turned out that the salesman wasn’t lying, it truly was a star map.
“It’s kind of like your eyes, don’t you think?”
I glanced at Ramona. She was referring to my namesake, my white-speckled midnight blue eyes that my parents claimed contained galaxies. Apparently they originally had a different name picked out for me, but once I was born my mom insisted that they name me Starry instead.
“I think this is prettier,” I said.
Ramona laughed and turned the sphere again, trying to see how many different images we could get.
A loud crash of thunder interrupted us and Ramona set down the globe to check her wristwatch.
“I should probably get home soon if it’s going to storm,” she said.
I nodded and turned off the flashlight. I wished she could stay longer, she only lived one house over, but I knew that her grandparents would worry if she was out during a storm. I thought about asking her to stay over again but then decided against it. She probably wanted to sleep in her own bed.
Ramona put the trinket back in its box and grabbed her coat. I walked her to the front door and somberly said goodbye. She gave me a hug and told me not to be sad. Then she threw her hood over her head and left to brave the already worsening storm.
~~~
I couldn’t sleep at all that night. I tossed and turned in my bed until the covers were twisted up with the sheets and falling off the mattress. The ghost ship was all I could think about. I desperately needed to see it again. I needed to know what it was and why it showed itself to me.
Giving up on the notion of slumber, I got out of bed and swung the balcony doors open. The storm raged on, blowing the curtains up into the air, rattling the wooden balcony doors, and tangling my hair.
Despite the angry winds, I knew what I had to do. I rushed over to my wardrobe and opened the bottom drawer. Pushing the clothes to the side, I grabbed a folded up rope ladder that Ramona and I had crafted so that she could sneak into my room at night.
I hurried out onto the balcony and closed the doors behind me. I tied the ends of the rope ladder to the railing with tight sailor knots. I had to learn how to make sturdy ties to make sure that Ramona wouldn’t fall whenever she climbed the ladder.
Throwing the ladder over the edge, I watched it unfold with gravity and I gulped nervously. I’d used the ladder before but never in a storm. Praying that I wouldn't be swept away by the harsh winds, I tied my thickest shawl around my waist and hoisted myself over the railing.
It was a shaky trip down but I made it to the ground safely. I untied the shawl from my waist and wrapped it tightly around myself. The storm was bad but I’d been outside in worse weather before.
I hurried to the boardwalk, having to squint my eyes most of the way there to keep the raindrops out of them. Luckily I knew my way around the island so well that I didn’t even need to see to know where I was going.
I went to the exact spot where I saw the mysterious ship the previous night and looked out at the endless waters. The rain created a static-like filter in the air, making it hard to see but I persisted.
At first it was just an empty horizon but as I stared at it, a shape began to form again in the distance. The ghost ship.
My mouth fell open in disbelief and I thought I must have been dreaming. This time I made sure not to look away, not wanting to lose sight of it again. I wondered if I should call out to it or wave my arms, do something to send a signal. That turned out to be unnecessary though.
Amazingly, the ship drew closer to the pier, moving faster than I’d ever seen a ship move before. It seemed to glide across the water’s surface, unaffected by the waves and currents.
I took a step back in surprise and I suddenly felt afraid. I felt like I wasn’t supposed to be there, like I shouldn’t be seeing what I was seeing. I thought that maybe I should run but it felt too late for that. The ship was nearly at the dock already, as clear as it could possibly be in front of my eyes.
Through the rain, I noticed a figure standing at the bow. Whoever it was was wearing a white mask that brilliantly reflected the moonlight and made it impossible to see their face behind it.
The ship eventually reached the dock and stopped, even though I couldn’t see any sign of a crew to tie it down. The vessel seemed to be moving all on its own.
Something compelled me to investigate so I ran down to the pier, not caring if I slipped on the wet path. My feet practically flew over the wooden dock as I raced towards the ship. I stopped next to the bow and saw that the masked person was still standing there. I could now make out more details about them. They appeared to be a small girl wearing a knee-length midnight blue dress. Short black hair stuck out behind the mask, dipping in under the string that held the mask in place.
“Hey!” I called. “Are you okay?!”
The girl turned her head to look down at me, revealing more of the mask. It mimicked a smiling cat face, with ear shapes coming out of the top and curved slits for the eye holes, squinting with happiness. A nose and whiskers were painted on the muzzle, which stuck out further than the rest of the mask. Aside from a couple blue-painted embellishments, the mask was a blank white color.
“You shouldn’t be out in this weather! It’s dangerous!” I hoped that she would heed my warning, I didn’t want her to get hurt. I wondered if she was with anyone. So far I hadn’t seen anyone else on the boat. It was strange.
Without saying anything, the girl turned and started walking toward the port beam. I watched as she unlatched the gangway and let it fall onto the dock. Despite the storm violently whipping the ends of her skirt around, she calmly walked down the gangway.
I rushed to help her so she didn’t trip, holding my hand out for her to grab onto. When she placed her hand in mine, I noticed that her skin was pale, as if she’d never been out in the sun before. I’d never seen a pale sailor before, I thought it was impossible.
When the girl stepped onto the dock, I realized she was the same height as me which meant we were probably the same age. I wondered what a kid was doing out on a ship all alone. Maybe she was a fugitive. If she was, I knew I had to help her.
“Come on, we should find shelter,” I said. Still holding her hand, I led the mysterious girl onto the boardwalk and started looking around for a place to hide out.
We eventually came to a small hut that was used to store firewood. It didn’t have a door but it would be good enough for the time being. It certainly wasn’t my first time being caught out in a storm so I knew what to do in the situation.
“We can wait here until there’s a break in the storm,” I said, sitting on the ground.
The girl nodded in response and lifted herself onto a box to sit. I gathered my hair up and twisted it together, wringing out the water. I stared up at the girl, wondering why she had been so quiet thus far.
“My name’s Starry,” I said. “What’s yours?”
There was a long silence before the girl answered. I think she was glancing around the hut, but it was hard to tell since I couldn’t see her face.
“Anna,” she finally said. Her child-like voice confirmed that she was about my age.
“What were you doing on that boat by yourself?”
Anna tilted her head as if she didn’t know what I was talking about. I figured she didn’t want to talk about it.
“Do you have somewhere to go?” I asked, hoping she at least had a place to stay. If my fugitive theory was correct, I needed to make sure she had somewhere safe to stay. At least, that’s what my parents always told me to do.
To my relief, Anna nodded.
“Do you know how to get there from here? When the storm breaks we’ll have to move quickly,” I explained. She obviously wasn’t from around here so I assumed she didn’t know what to do in one of our island’s perilous storms.
Anna nodded again. I could already tell that she wasn’t the type to talk much so I decided to just sit quietly until we could move. I understood not wanting to speak, I didn’t want to talk most of the time either.
Instead I just watched the rain fall outside of the archway, listening to the drops noisily colliding with the stone path.
Fate or something better, I could care less. Just stay with me a while
That was when I noticed something unusual. Since it was so late, I was tired and wanted the storm to break so I could go home but a strong part of me didn’t want to leave the hut. I was overcome with a calming sense of peace and content, a feeling that I could only assume was wholeness. My lonely heart stopped hurting for once and the feeling was alien yet comforting.
I looked up at Anna again and she looked back at me as if she could sense my gaze. My eyes searched the cat mask for any semblance of a human face but the only two holes in the mask were so narrow that I couldn’t see through them.
I wondered if Anna was the cause of my sudden tranquility. She was the only thing that was truly different that night. It made total sense, yet was completely nonsensical at the same time.
The wind started letting up soon and I knew our window of opportunity was coming up.
“Anna?”
She looked down at me again.
“Will I see you again?” I asked.
“I’ll be here a while,” she answered.
“Where can I find you?”
Anna tilted her head thoughtfully, kicking her bare feet. I hadn’t noticed until then that she didn’t have shoes on. I was too at ease to worry about it though. All I wanted to know was when I could be around her again.
“I’ll come find you, Starry.”
That answer wasn’t good enough for me but I couldn’t bring myself to argue. I sighed and willed myself to stand up. I knew I would never forgive myself for letting her go but I had no choice.
“We should go now. I think it’s safe,” I said.
Anna hopped off of the box and followed me through the archway, back into the pouring rain. I knew that goodbye was coming and I felt the need to leave her with some sort of direction. I pointed down one of the streets.
“My house is that way.”
Instead of acknowledging my last-ditch words, Anna grabbed my hand and squeezed it tightly for a long moment before letting go. Without warning she ran off in the opposite direction, disappearing around a corner. I was certain that would be the last time I ever saw her.
I need you now, put me back together, make me right
I rushed home, crying the entire way back. My heart was aching again and I missed the comforting relief from it that I had just experienced.
I climbed the rope ladder and pulled it back over the railing. I untied the tricky knot, it was hard to see through my tears but I managed.
After hiding the ladder back underneath my clothes, I climbed into bed and hid under the covers. I wished that I could just disappear but all I could do was hope that Anna would visit me in my dreams.
Summary: Starry spends the majority of her life feeling lonely until one day a mysterious girl named Anna appears in her town. The two quickly become close but Starry soon realizes that there’s more to Anna than meets the eye.
Four part story. Each part is inspired by a different song.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 4
Word Count: ~4.8K
Lyrics from "Dancing With A Wolf" by All Time Low
Fool me once, it’s shame on you
A week passed and Anna started to become more well known around town. A few of the older townsfolk were afraid of her, saying that her ambiguous origin could spell bad news. They were scared that more strangers would soon come to the island, perhaps to look for her.
Those who were not afraid of her wanted to know more about the mysterious masked child who had taken up residence on our island. They wanted to see her face. Many people would ask her to take her mask off but Anna would politely refuse.
When people asked her where she was from, Anna would say, “Far away.” When they asked her if she had a family, she would say, “I have my friends.” When they asked her anything else, she wouldn’t answer.
Who’s gonna listen when you run out of lies?
Anna came back to my house every single night during that week. She would spend a lot of time looking out at the ocean and I would silently read my books. We continued our reading lessons. Anna remained a fast learner. I was impressed with how quickly she was memorizing all the words. I hoped that one day she would be able to read an entire book to me.
As the week progressed, Anna began talking to me more and I was so happy. I realized that the reason she didn’t talk much was because she was trying to hide her limited ability to speak Esalezian. She was fluent enough to understand basic conversation, but just barely. I understood why she didn’t want other people to know. I didn’t mind of course, I could still understand her perfectly.
When our conversations became longer, Anna would talk about me a lot. She would talk about my eyes a lot, apparently she was fond of them.
“You have tiny galaxies in your eyes,” she would say. Even though I had heard that compliment a million times before, it sounded different when Anna said it. She said it like she truly believed that there were baby universes hidden away in my eyes.
Anna told me multiple times that I should wear darker clothes to match my eyes. I told her that I didn’t have any. All of my clothes were either pink, white, or pastel colors. I always thought dark colors were dull and that they would make me look frightening. I knew a few older kids who wore only dark clothes and I thought they were scary.
I was willing to try it though. I asked Anna where she got her dress from and she told me that she made it herself. Then she offered to make me one. I accepted, thinking it would be a lovely gift. A homemade gift is better than anything you can buy for someone. My mom always told me that when you make something, you put a tiny piece of your heart into it.
We asked my mom if Anna could borrow her sewing machine and she happily helped us bring it to my room. She said that sewing was a good skill for girls like us to learn.
By the end of the week, Anna was already finished making my new dress (out of fabric lovingly donated to us by my mom). Anna insisted that I try it on immediately and when I twirled in it for her she squealed with delight. She told me that I had never looked more beautiful.
Feeling confident from her praise, I suggested we go walk around town so I could show it off. Anna agreed enthusiastically so we left the house to go to the night market.
Anna proudly held my hand as we walked around, like she wanted everyone to see how I looked in my new dress. Aside from a couple of the merchants mentioning that I wasn’t wearing my usual clothes, not many people noticed. I was perfectly okay with that though, I was just happy that Anna thought I was pretty.
So don’t you call my name
“Starry?”
I turned away from the booth we were looking at to see Ramona standing behind me.
“Hi, Ramona,” I greeted. Anna turned around too, but she didn’t say anything.
“Where have you been all week? I haven’t heard from you,” Ramona said.
“Sorry, I’ve been in my room a lot this week. Oh, and I’ve been at the beach almost every day,” I explained.
Ramona paused before speaking again. Her eyes flicked between me and the ground below her, a solemn look clouded her expression. She then looked at Anna.
“Hello, Anna.”
Anna responded with a polite wave.
“I stopped by your house a couple times,” Ramona said to me. “Your mom kept saying you were busy.”
My mom would try not to interrupt me while I had company over, but she usually mentioned it as soon as I was no longer busy. That was the thing though, I had been busy all week and my mom could probably see that.
“I have been busy…” I admitted. “But I’ll ask my mom to just interrupt me if that happens again.”
Ramona nodded. I found it strange that she wasn’t smiling as much as she usually did when we talked. Perhaps she was angry with me for not making an effort to see her. That made me feel bad. I must have seemed like a terrible friend.
“Hey, do you want to walk around the market with us for a bit?” I offered, thinking I could start making it up to her right away.
“No, I have to get back home. I’m working on an important project,” Ramona explained. “Thanks though.”
She finally gave me a smile and I felt relieved. I never meant to upset her. I made a mental note to call her the next morning.
After we’d seen everything at the night market, Anna asked if we could go to the beach. Ignoring my fear of the water at night, I agreed to go. Anna had quickly taught me to love the beach, showing me that the ocean was nothing to be afraid of.
Opting to stay close to the streetlamps, we sat down against the stone wall of the boardwalk.
“No one comes to the beach,” Anna observed. Her tone sounded sad and disappointed.
“A lot of the people who live here are afraid of the water,” I explained. “And it’s usually too cold to swim this time of year anyway.”
“Why are they afraid?” Anna asked.
I hesitated before answering, considering whether or not I should tell the truth. I didn’t want to scare her, but Anna seemed to have no fear at all. She could probably handle it.
“It’s mostly superstition, but even my parents still believe it. The elders say that a long time ago, when they were kids, exactly one child would drown every year. According to them, it would always happen late in the night when everyone on the island was sleeping. They thought that the sea lured the children out of their homes and down to the beach, where the waves would steal them away.”
“Is that why you’re not allowed on the beach at night?” Anna asked.
“Yeah, my parents are still afraid it might happen again,” I answered. My voice wavered a bit, though I wasn’t sure why.
Anna reached over and held my hand.
“How could the ocean lure someone?” she wondered, thinking out loud.
“There’s a lot of theories. Sirens, ghost ships, even the moon,” I said.
Anna looked at me. Her mask was half glowing orange from the streetlamps behind us and half brilliant white from the moon in front of us.
“Do you believe them?” she asked.
“Not really,” I answered. Even though I didn’t believe the tall tales that the older townsfolk told, I was still fearful of drowning.
Seeing my mom avoid the ocean at all costs made me think that drowning must have been a terrible fate. I obviously didn’t know what drowning would feel like and every time I asked my parents about it, my mom would start having trouble breathing and her hands would tremble. Then my dad would change the subject.
When it was time for me to learn how to swim, something every child who lives by the water should do, my dad had to teach me alone. My mom tried to watch me for my first lesson but she screamed and started crying when I jumped in the water.
The water was something that scared even my mom so I figured it had to be dangerous.
“My friends will be here soon,” Anna said, looking back out at the ocean.
“When?” I asked.
“Soon… At night.” Anna glanced around the area. “I think the beach would be the perfect place.”
“For what?”
Anna didn’t answer me, but giggled in excitement instead. She stood up and looked down at me. “Will you come meet them when they are here?”
I nodded and Anna jumped up and down, exclaiming something in a language I had never heard before. She held her hand out to me so I took it and let her pull me into a standing position. She twirled me around and hugged me when my back rested against her.
~~~
The next morning Anna was awake before I was. I opened my eyes to see her standing on the balcony, her favorite spot in my room. The morning breeze rustled the curtains and the bottom of Anna’s dress. She seemed unfazed though.
I got out of bed and greeted her before getting dressed. I decided to put on the same dress I was wearing the previous night, still overjoyed that Anna handmade it just for me.
When I sat down in front of my mirror to brush my hair, Anna came back into the room and stood behind me.
“You should cut your hair,” she said.
“Huh? Why?” I looked at her through the mirror and somehow I could tell she was making eye contact with me.
“You’re always pulling tangles out of it and it goes in your face when it’s windy.”
I stopped brushing and thought about it. What she said was true, the wind always blew my hair into my face, which could get annoying sometimes. Getting rid of the tangles everyday was painful too.
But I loved my hair. I always thought it made me look pretty. It would have been hard for me to just cut all of it off. What if I looked like a boy without it?
I turned around to look at Anna directly. She had short hair and she was beautiful. Everyone could tell she was a girl, even with her face completely covered.
“I will cut it for you, if you like,” Anna offered.
Still hesitant, I told her I’d think about it. That seemed to satisfy her and she changed the subject.
~~~
We went to the square that day. Nothing was planned to happen there but Anna wanted to go dance anyway. She said she needed to teach me how to dance for when her friends arrived. I asked again what her friends were going to do once they got there and she finally gave me some form of an answer.
“We will celebrate!” she announced.
Luckily, there were usually one or two gypsies with instruments in the square when no events were planned. Anna asked the mandolin player to strum us something to dance to. Since we were both just kids, he smiled and played for us free of charge.
Anna instructed me to follow her lead, just like last time. She took my hand and began a dance that was similar to the last time we danced except it was much faster. So fast that we were off tempo with the music. Anna either didn’t notice or didn’t care because she never adjusted our speed.
Again, her dance included many, many spins. I got dizzy but I clung onto Anna’s hands, knowing that she wouldn’t let me fall.
There was a part of her dance where we had to let go of each other though. As I took a moment to get my footing, I watched as Anna continued to spin. She had one leg out behind her and the opposite arm was beautifully stretched out above her head. Her spine bent just slightly, creating a smooth, curving line from her fingertips to her toes. I was in awe. She looked like a spinning dancer figure from one of Ramona’s music boxes.
I tried to mimic Anna’s movements, guessing that I was supposed to do as she did. It was difficult. Anna made the dance look completely effortless but when I tried to do the same moves it took a lot of strength and balance. I nearly fell over a few times.
When Anna finally moved close to me again, she took my hands and pulled me close. We stepped from side to side, which was more reminiscent of the dancing I was used to. Our dance slowed down as well, now going in time with the music. It was lovely and relaxing. I enjoyed that part the most.
Soon, Anna let go of my hands and bowed to me, ending the dance.
“How did I do?” I asked.
My question elicited a giggle from Anna and she nodded in response. I assumed that meant I did well.
~~~
For the next few days, Anna and I practiced dancing in the square. The gypsies seemed to enjoy our performances, as they never refused to play for us.
Anna had a strange way of teaching. She almost never gave me vocal instructions, wanting me to learn by copying her instead. I knew that Anna disliked speaking in front of other people so I didn’t mind it for the most part. It did get frustrating a couple times but Anna would notice me having trouble and rush to my side to guide me with her hands.
When we would go back to my room at the end of the day, Anna would give me advice on what I could improve on. Since we were in the privacy of my home she felt that she could speak freely.
Anna was adamant about the fact that I needed to be good at dancing for when her friends arrived. When I asked her why, she told me that she wanted her friends to be impressed by me. I thought that was a strange thing to want, but in a certain way it made me feel special.
One night, Anna and I were lying down with our heads on my balcony, looking up at the stars. The curtains on my balcony doors were blowing in the wind but they never blew high enough to abstract our view. This was something I had done many times before either by myself or with Ramona. For some reason, doing it alongside Anna made it feel like a brand new experience.
We were showing each other our favorite stars and constellations when a terrible thought crept into my mind. The thought that things could not be like this forever. The past couple weeks had felt like I was living inside some beautiful dream. Just me and Anna spending every day and every night together. I had never felt so light and carefree before. Anna made me forget what it felt like to be lonely and I knew that I couldn’t bear to be reminded again. I worried that the dream would end soon.
“Anna?”
“Hm?”
“Are we in love?”
Anna turned her head to look at me, her mask darkening as it moved away from the moonlight. She shrugged and brushed my hair out of my face.
“Will you stay with me?” I asked.
“What do you mean?” Anna responded.
“You must have a home somewhere in this world. Are you going to go back to it?”
“My home is with my friends,” Anna said.
“Will your friends stay here when they come? Will you leave me when they come?” I felt tears welling up in my eyes as I spoke. The thought of Anna leaving me alone again was crushing.
Anna just stared at me through the mask. Despite its happy expression, it looked sad to me. I felt that sadness in my own expression as a tear rolled down my cheek. Anna gently wiped it away and ran her thumb along my cheekbone.
“We will be together,” she said. “I know we will.”
Please take me at my word, I’m desperate
~~~
The day came when Anna’s friends were supposed to arrive. She left my house early to do some “preparations”. She never elaborated on what she meant by that but I didn’t question her either. She promised she would be back before nightfall to come get me. Then we would go meet her friends together for their celebration.
For the first time in two weeks, I was alone. It was scary.
I thought about going to see Ramona but she never stopped by again since I saw her at the night market. I even asked my mom to let me know the next time she was at the door. My mom never came to get me though. When I asked if Ramona had been by the house, she told me that there was no sign of her. So I assumed that Ramona was still mad at me. I’ve never done well with people being angry with me and I couldn’t bring myself to face Ramona.
Instead, I decided to reread one of my favorite books. It contained a couple different stories about nomads, wanderers who explored the world, seeing everything that there was to see. The stories chronicled their adventures in different parts of the world. Places that I couldn’t believe existed. It was wonderful to read about, I must have read that book at least twenty times.
After finishing the book, I tried to get myself looking presentable for the celebration. I tried on several dresses that Anna had made for me. They were all similar, made out of the same dark fabric just in different silhouettes. I thought hard about which one Anna would like best. Eventually I decided on the one that looked most like the one she wore.
Still feeling desperate to please Anna, I sat down in front of my mirror and picked up my brush. Anna didn’t like the tangles in my hair so I was determined to get every last one of them out before she returned.
As I brushed, I thought about the conversation we had the other night. Despite Anna’s reassurance, I was still so scared of losing her. I thought that if I looked the way she wanted me to, maybe then she would stay with me.
I yelped in pain when my hairbrush came to a sudden halt halfway down my hair, pulling at my scalp. Carefully, I eased the brush back up a bit and removed it from my hair. My heart sank when I realized that it only made even more knots. I looked worse than before I started.
I started to cry, my tears salty like the ocean. I didn’t know what to do. I’d never get the knots out of my hair, it was impossible.
Please stay. For what it’s worth, I’m desperate
Desperately looking around my room for ideas, my gaze landed on a pair of scissors left next to the sewing machine. I thought about what Anna said to me. Perhaps she was right.
I got up and retrieved the scissors before sitting back down in front of the mirror. I gathered my tangled hair up in my hand and held the blades up to it. With a deep breath, I squeezed the handles together and my hair came loose, limp in my hand.
Putting down the clump of now useless hair, I stared at myself in the mirror. I actually didn’t look bad. I was always so afraid that cutting my hair would make me ugly. To my surprise, I looked…pretty. Pretty like Anna. The cut itself was messy and needed to be touched up, but it was close to how Anna’s hair looked.
Concentrating, I cut off more on the side bit by bit. I used Anna’s hair for reference, trying to emulate the pixie style she had.
When Anna returned to my room that night, she gasped in shock and happiness when she saw me.
“You look so pretty!” she exclaimed before wrapping her arms around me.
“Thank you,” I replied, hugging back.
Anna held me in her embrace for a long moment. She was holding onto me more tightly than usual, like I might slip away at any moment. I wondered if she felt the same way I did.
When Anna let go of me, her gaze wandered around my face. I think she was still taking in the way I looked with my new hair. She then looked at the window behind me. She said that it was time and held out her hand to me.
I placed my hand in Anna’s and she led me out of my room. My parents were already sleeping, so we silently left the house without anyone noticing.
Anna held my hand the entire way to the beach. She kept talking about how excited she was for me to meet her friends.
I wished I shared in her excitement, but instead I was nervous and afraid. I was worried that her friends wouldn’t like me. I had no idea how Anna would react if they didn’t. Would she defend me? Or would she be swayed by their opinions? It was impossible to tell. Even though I knew Anna pretty well by then, she was still difficult to read most of the time.
I could only hope that it wouldn’t be our last night together.
Who’s gonna save you when you’re out of time?
~~~
Fool me twice and let the wolves come crashing through
What awaited us on the beach that night was something I would never have expected. I’m not sure what I thought Anna’s friends would be like, but it certainly wasn’t that.
We walked a long way until we arrived at an area that was far from the lights of the town. A section of the beach was lit up by the fiery flicker of torches that were stuck in the sand. There were silhouettes of people -tall people- moving around in the light of the flames.
As we walked toward the group, a strange type of music filled my ears. It sounded like bamboo sticks being hit together in a sporadic rhythm that switched back and forth between tempos. I had never heard something like that before. All the music I’d heard in my life had consisted of string and wind instruments. Hearing just percussion was jarring.
I nervously glanced at Anna. She responded by squeezing my hand, silently telling me that it was going to be okay.
When we got close enough for the people to notice us, they all stopped dancing and the few people playing music put down their instruments.
Next thing I knew, I was face-to-face with a wolf. A person wearing a realistic wolf mask, that is. He was wearing dark clothing that appeared to be made out of several different rags sewn together. He was also a lot taller than me and Anna, definitely an older kid. Actually, all of Anna’s friends looked to be quite a few years older than us.
“Hello, Anna,” the boy said. His voice was muffled by the mask, but I could still tell that he couldn’t speak Esalezian well. Not as well as Anna could, at least.
“Hello, Fang” Anna replied cheerfully. She gestured towards me. “This is Starry.”
Fang looked at me, tilting his head from side to side and darting his eyes around. I felt like I was being examined by an actual wolf, deciding whether or not to kill and eat me. I tried not to let my fear show though.
“Good night, Starry,” Fang eventually said.
Assuming that he meant to say “good evening”, I forced a smile and nodded.
Fang then stretched one of his arms out to the side and twisted his body back, presenting the rest of Anna’s friends to us. They were all staring at me with curiosity. I noticed right away that they were all wearing masks. Some of the masks mimicked animal faces, others looked like humans, and some depicted strange, otherworldly creatures. The masks were made of various different materials, wood, clay, and straw. Some, like Fang’s, even looked like they were made from real animal carcasses. Those ones unnerved me the most.
“Dance?” Fang asked.
Anna nodded and took my hand again. Fang turned around to head back into the crowd and we followed behind him. He started tapping a couple sticks he had in hands together and the other people with instruments joined him. This time, the song seemed to stay at a steady tempo. I was thankful for that, since it would be easier to dance to.
Everyone started to dance. Anna guided me through one of the dances we had practiced in the square. When I looked around, I saw that all of Anna’s friends were dancing the same way that she did. They all spun and dipped each other low. It was dizzying to spin so much in a sea of twirling bodies.
I managed to keep up for a while and I actually started to have fun. That was until the music started to gradually speed up. At first I just had to adjust my movements and follow Anna’s lead, which was fine. Unfortunately, Anna was soon pulled away from my grasp by one of her friends. I did my best to continue the dance but was thrown off when I was grabbed.
Startled, I looked up to see a girl in a hawk mask was holding my wrist. She spun me around a couple times and then passed me to another person.
The next person was a boy wearing a human-like mask. I was dipped toward the sand and then suddenly flipped backwards over his arm. The world flipped upside down around me, completely out of my control, until my feet finally landed on the cool sand.
Disoriented, I didn’t even realize that the boy had passed me to another person. When I did finally realize, I had no time to look at their mask before they lifted me into the air. At the same time that I was raised above the crowd, Anna was lifted up as well and I saw her posing as if she had no fear. I, on the other hand, was terrified at how high off the ground I was, afraid that I would be dropped.
Then, the person holding me up twirled us around before quickly setting me down again. When I felt my legs stabilize on the ground and realized that I was fine, I breathed a sigh of relief and looked around for Anna. I was becoming tired from the erratic dance but the music was only speeding up more. I needed to take a break but I didn’t want to go anywhere without Anna.
I tried to weave my way through the crowd of dancing bodies. A few of the older kids took my hand along the way and spun me around. It became hard to tell which direction I was facing. I might have been going in circles for all I knew.
Eventually though, I spotted Anna in the crowd. Her bright white mask stood out from the rest of the brown, gray, and black masks that her friends were wearing.
I moved to approach her but then stopped in my tracks when Fang scooped her up and spun her around. Anna laughed and stretched her arms up towards the sky. She looked so graceful amongst the chaos that surrounded us. Then Fang dipped her down so fast that I thought she might get whiplash. He flipped her backwards over his arm, just like another boy did to me before. Anna kept her legs completely straight as she was overturned, posing them in an almost perfect L-shape. When she landed, Fang turned her in towards his body, wrapping his arms around her.
What happened next made my heart sink into my stomach. Anna lifted her mask and then lifted Fang’s as well. Standing on her toes, she gently kissed him.
I felt all the energy drain from my body at once and my legs threatened to give out beneath me. I couldn’t hear the music anymore and I suddenly felt cold. The heat from the torches seemed to vanish completely. A shiver ran up my spine.
No one will want you when you’re on your knees
Dizzy and exhausted, I fell to my knees. My hands instinctively shot out front of me and my palms scraped against the cool sand as they braced my fall.
When I looked up again, I saw Anna staring at me. She was completely still and her head was tilted to the side in confusion. I stared back at her just as confused as she was.
It felt like we were frozen together in that moment. I could hear nothing except my own heartbeat, I could see nothing but Anna, and I could feel nothing except complete, utter loneliness.
Summary: Starry spends the majority of her life feeling lonely until one day a mysterious girl named Anna appears in her town. The two quickly become close but Starry soon realizes that there’s more to Anna than meets the eye.
Four part story. Each part is inspired by a different song.
Part 1 - Part 3 - Part 4
Word Count: ~7.4K
Song lyrics from "Starry Eyed" by Ellie Goulding and "Loreley" by Blackmore's Night.
Take me in and throw out my heart and get a new one
I awoke to the sound of sporadic tapping on my window. Sitting up, I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and looked at my balcony doors. I discovered the source of the tapping as a tiny rock hit the window. Confused, I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and hopped down to investigate.
I unlatched the lock on the door and carefully opened them, keeping an eye out for stray rocks. I approached the railing and looked down to see Ramona standing on the path outside with a fist full of pebbles.
“Wake up, sleepyhead,” she called. “It’s almost the afternoon.”
That was a shock, I almost never slept in. I must have been exhausted from the previous night, which at that point I was convinced was all a dream.
A ship sailed by no one appears at the dock in the dead of night and a strange girl wearing a cat mask departs from it without explanation. It was the stuff of fairytales and something that my mind definitely made up.
“I’m going to explore the jungle today. Do you want to come with me?” Ramona asked.
I nodded and rushed back into my room to get dressed.
Ramona was waiting for me by the front door when I came downstairs. We told my parents where we were going and they told us to be careful and not to go too far. Then the two of us were off on a new adventure.
“I guess you haven’t seen that girl yet, since you’ve been sleeping,” Ramona mentioned as we strolled. through the town.
I nearly stopped in my tracks. Was it not a dream after all?
“What girl?”
“There was a girl who appeared in town this morning,” Ramona explained. “Nobody knows where she came from. Apparently she won’t talk to anyone and she wears this weird mask. No one’s seen her face yet.”
“What? Where is she?” I asked, trying my best to hide the desperation in my voice.
“I dunno. I haven’t seen her yet either. Some grown-ups near the marketplace just told me about it.”
That time I did stop walking. So Anna was real. I needed to find her as soon as possible. I needed to ask if anyone knew where she went.
I quickly told Ramona that I couldn’t go to the jungle with her and that I needed to go do something. I apologized and ran off. Ramona didn’t argue with me, or at least not that I heard.
Frantically racing around town, I asked everyone I saw if they’d seen where the mysterious girl had gone. Most people didn’t know but a couple of grown-ups in the square said she went in the direction of the beach. It was a long shot, the beach was huge since it stretched around almost the entire perimeter of the island, but it was all I had to go on.
I made my way to one of the few sets of stairs around the town that went down to the beach. Taking off my shoes, I went down the steps, careful not to trip. I could have jumped down from the edge of one of the paths but that was dangerous for a kid like me to do, especially since I was still so short.
Wet sand slipped between my toes as I walked closer to the waterline. I thought that if I was closer to the shore I would have a better view of the area. I didn’t want to miss Anna if she was out there.
I walked along the beach for what felt like hours. Anna was nowhere to be seen and I was starting to give up on the idea of seeing her again. She had probably already left and gone back to wherever it was she came from.
Defeated, I stopped at the next large rock I came across and sat in front of it. I leaned my shoulders back against the rough stone and let out a long, tired sigh. It must have all just been a fantasy. I didn’t know what was going on. Perhaps I’d misheard Ramona. Maybe the townsfolk just gave me a fake answer so as to not upset me.
“Starry?”
Startled, I straightened my back and whipped my head around to see who had called my name. I nearly cried when I saw a white cat mask looking down at me.
“Anna!” I scrambled to my feet and despairingly wrapped my arms around her. When she didn’t reciprocate the embrace, I let go of her. “I was looking everywhere for you.”
Anna giggled and swayed a bit. “I told you I’d come find you. You didn’t have to look.”
“Sorry. I just really needed to see you again,” I explained.
Reaching out, Anna gently took both my hands in hers. “Here I am.”
We spent the rest of the afternoon on the beach together. We ran along the shore hand-in-hand, splashed around and danced in the water, and collected shells, giving the prettiest ones we found to each other. All of those things were Anna’s idea. I almost never went to the beach, so I didn’t know what people even do at the beach.
Ramona hated the beach and always refused to accompany me to the sandy shore. She preferred exploring the jungle, which was fun too but it could get boring sometimes.
Anna, on the other hand, told me that she loved the beach. She said that she would live on the beach if she could. I thought that was a strange thing to say. I’d heard of people living on the beach before, that was just something you could do. When I asked Anna why she couldn’t live on the beach though, she just shrugged and playfully splashed me with water.
By the time the sun started to set we were both tired out so we sat against the rock and watched nature’s beautiful display of light and color.
“My friends will be here soon,” Anna said.
“Who are your friends?” I asked.
Anna didn’t respond. It seemed that she didn’t like answering questions.
We sat in silence for a long moment before Anna spoke again.
“Have you ever been in love, Starry?”
“Aren’t we still too young to fall in love?” I responded. “I thought only grown-ups could fall in love.”
“I don’t think so,” Anna said.
I thought about it. No one ever told me what being in love felt like. When I asked my parents they told me that it was hard to describe and that it feels different for everyone. That didn’t make any sense to me.
Now that I was next to Anna again, there was no pain or emptiness in my chest anymore. I knew that love came from your heart, so maybe that was what love felt like? Maybe that was why I felt so complete when I was around Anna.
“I think I might be in love with you,” I said, thinking out loud.
Anna turned her head to look at me for a second and then faced the sunset again, the orange light tinting her mask. She didn’t say anything and I couldn’t help but wonder what she was thinking.
“Hey Anna, what do you look like?” I asked.
That caught Anna’s attention. She shifted to sit on her knees and turned her body to face me. Her hands rested neatly on her lap and she sat with perfect posture.
“I’ll show you if you want,” she offered.
I nodded and Anna brought her hands up to the mask. She placed one hand on the bottom of it and one hand on the top. She carefully lifted the mask, pulling the top back so that it rested on top of her head.
You look at me, it’s like you hit me with lighting
Before me I saw an angelic, otherworldly face, indescribably beautiful in a million different ways. It was perfect yet wild and unexpected. I felt like it was the first time I had ever seen another person’s face, no one else compared. My heart filled with joy when our eyes met and I felt that sense of peace even more strongly than before.
“You’re so–”
Anna cut my praise short by leaning forward and pressing her lips against mine. They were soft and gentle and I instinctively shut my eyes. I’d never kissed anyone before but that’s what I saw my parents do when they kissed. They would look lovingly into each other’s eyes, then they would kiss and both close their eyes, staying still for a few moments. Anna did the same thing, then pulled away after a few short, sweet seconds passed.
I opened my mouth to speak but Anna held a slender finger over her pale lips, silencing whatever compliment was going to come out. She then pulled her mask back down over her face, returning it to its normal place.
“They say my face is dangerous,” she said, looking down in shame.
“Why?”
Anna did not answer. She left her head hanging and I felt her sadness. Maybe she didn’t know the answer, or maybe she didn’t understand it. What a cruel thing to say to a young girl.
“Who says that?” I asked, warmly placing my hand on top of hers.
“The sailors.”
Sailors? I hadn’t had many interactions with sailors before. My parents told me to stay away from the sailors when I was alone. They never said why I should stay away or that the seafarers were dangerous in any way. I never questioned it though, most sailors didn’t try to approach me anyway. The only times I’d spoken to them were during the town’s festivals, when everyone was merry and dancing.
“Did you come here with sailors?” I asked. “Were they on that boat with you?”
Anna finally looked up again and deliberately shook her head. She did not elaborate and that left me confused. It shouldn’t have been possible for a kid to sail a ship that large all by herself.
The beach was painted a bright orange hue that was slowly turning red, signifying that the sun was almost down. Anna flipped her hand up to wrap her fingers around mine and bring it up to her cheek behind the mask. She nuzzled her cheek against my hand and I felt her messy hair tickle my skin.
I smiled at her and somehow I could tell that she was smiling back at me. I wished we could have stayed out there all night, but the beach was a dangerous place to be after dark.
We waited until the sun was just a sliver on the sea’s horizon before we walked back to town, hand in hand. A chilly evening wind ruffled my hair and slipped through my sweater. I shivered and glanced at Anna, whose dress flew up a bit in the breeze. She seemed completely unphased by the cold, not a single goosebump appeared on her fair skin. I asked her if she was cold and she shook her head.
We kept walking until we got to the street that my house was on, right at the edge of town, less than a minute away from the ocean. I squeezed Anna’s hand to get her attention and pointed at my house. She stopped to look in the direction I was pointing.
“This is my house,” I told her.
Anna nodded and thoughtfully tapped her fingers on the chin of her mask. “It’s beautiful.”
“You think so?” Beautiful is not a word I would have used to describe my house. It was old and broken down, the paint and wood peeling from years of harsh storms. The windows, despite being clean, were all cloudy around the edges and the roof was being eaten away by rust. Tall weeds had overtaken the bottom floor walls years ago, even one of our kitchen windows was covered by them. It looked like most of the other houses in town, there was nothing special about it.
Anna nodded again and then turned to face me. She took my other hand and swung both of them side to side. I giggled at the amusing motion.
“You should go inside,” Anna said somberly.
“Come with me,” I pleaded. I didn’t want to part with her yet, not after how wonderful spending the day together felt.
“Another time.” Anna reached out to lovingly caress my cheek. “I have to go.” She stepped back and walked past me.
“Wait! When can we see each other again?” I called.
“I’ll come find you,” was the only answer Anna gave me. She ran off again and was quickly out of my sight. I wanted to chase after her but I was scared that it might make her mad.
Instead, I complied with her wish and went inside. My parents greeted me and offered me dinner. I thanked them for the meal but decided to go eat in my room, not wanting to explain why I didn’t go to the jungle with Ramona.
I hoped that Ramona still had fun by herself. I felt a bit bad for abandoning her at the last minute but I knew there would be plenty of time for us to go on more adventures. There was no telling how long Anna would stay in town and I had a feeling that she wouldn’t tell me even if I asked her.
I spent most of the evening sitting on the floor of my balcony. It wasn’t storming that night so I took the opportunity to look at the stars and listen to the waves. It might have just been my imagination, but the stars didn’t seem to shine as brightly as they usually did. Compared to the way Anna made me feel that day, the stars felt like distant strangers. Maybe they always were and I just hadn’t noticed.
~~~
I knocked on the front door at Ramona’s house early the next morning to apologize. I wanted to make up for our missed adventure the day before, if she was available. Her grandma answered the door and happily invited me inside. She told me that Ramona was still in her room crafting something. I thanked her and went upstairs to Ramona’s bedroom.
“Ramona?” I called, letting her know it was me coming in.
When I began to open the door, I heard Ramona quickly stand up and shuffle some things around. The door opened wide enough to see her slam a drawer in her workbench shut, nearly knocking over some of the crystals she kept on the corners of the desk. She turned around and smiled, blocking the drawer with her body.
“Hey, Starry.”
“What were you making?” I asked. Ramona always showed me the projects she was working on, whether it was a modified trinket or an original creation. The fact that she was hiding it roused my curiosity.
“Um.. it’s a surprise,” Ramona answered. “Come on in.”
I shut the door behind me, the old wood moving with a loud creak. Her mattress dipped beneath me when I sat on the edge of her bed.
“Ramona…” I glanced around the room, trying to find the right words. I wasn’t quite sure how to explain myself but maybe I wouldn’t have to. “I’m sorry for running off yesterday.”
“Oh, that’s alright, Starry,” Ramona said with a smile. “You missed out on some cool stuff though.” Ramona went on to tell me about the wonderful adventure she’d had by herself. She saw a flock of the most vibrant-feathered birds either of us had ever seen. She’d climbed all the way up a centuries old tree and at the top she could see miles of the seemingly endless jungle. She even found a few trinkets left behind by someone who couldn’t appreciate them the way she would.
It was a captivating story and it almost made me regret not accompanying her.
As Ramona showed me her newly found trinkets, she asked what I had done yesterday. I told her about my encounter with the masked girl and Ramona was immediately intrigued.
“What was she like?”
“She was amazing.” There was not much else to say about her, at least not anything that anyone else would understand.
“Where did she come from?” Ramona asked.
I shrugged. I didn’t want to tell Ramona the truth that I saw Anna arrive on the ghost ship. She might have thought I had lost my mind. Besides, I still wasn’t entirely sure that it was even real and not a dream. Anna was definitely real but ghost ships shouldn’t be. I even passed by the harbor on my way to the beach the previous day and there were no new ships. There hadn’t been any for a while.
Ramona gave me a confused look, wanting a real answer.
“She doesn’t talk much,” I explained. “She did tell me that her name is Anna though.”
“Anna, hm…”
“What?”
“I dunno. I just thought she’d have a more spectacular name, since she’s so mysterious.” Ramona had a point. Anna was an uncharacteristically simple name for such an enigmatic person.
I felt the need to tell Ramona more but a part of me was scared to. I was like a pirate who’d found a glorious treasure, wanting to flaunt my newfound riches but, at the same time, afraid of having them stolen. Ramona was the person I trusted most in my small, secluded world though, so I thought that it might be okay to tell her a bit more.
“I saw her face,” I blurted out.
Ramona stopped playing with the metallic trinket that she was holding. “She took her mask off?”
I nodded. “Only for a minute.”
Ramona asked me what she looked like. I told her that it was too hard to describe, any string of words I could put together wouldn’t do it justice. So Ramona started asking more specific questions.
“What color were her eyes?”
“A color I’ve never seen before.”
“What was her smile like?”
“She didn’t smile.”
“What shape was her face?”
“The perfect shape.”
Ramona soon realized that she wasn’t going to get any specific answers from me. She tried to get me to compare Anna’s features to other things we’d seen before but nothing was even remotely similar. I felt that making comparisons would do less to help describe her than saying nothing at all.
We gave up on description and Ramona decided she would just have to see for herself. I thought it was a good idea and I told her that Anna was a nice person once you got to know her.
Part of me was still terrified of what might happen if Ramona saw Anna’s face. Would she fall in love with her too? Would she take her away from me? I wanted to believe that Ramona wouldn’t do that to me but I couldn’t be sure.
I just hoped that Anna would refuse to talk to her, just like she did with the rest of the townsfolk.
I spent the day in Ramona’s bedroom. She made alterations to some of her trinkets and I helped her paint some of her woodworking projects. Ramona was a talented craftsman, all of her creations and modifications had a true artistic quality to them. Not every project worked the way it was intended, but they all looked beautiful.
That was something Ramona was working toward, trying to find a way to put more emphasis on functionality without sacrificing presentation. I always saw improvement in her work and I knew she had a bright future with her skills.
~~~
In the evening we went to the square together. There was going to be music and dancing, something the townsfolk always did at the end of the week.
Ramona wanted me to dance with her but I wasn’t sure about it. We used to dance together a lot but that was back when we were the same height. Recently it was becoming embarrassing to dance with her because I thought we looked weird together. I had to stand on my toes and awkwardly bend my body to perform our usual dance moves. I told her that maybe I would but I mostly planned to just dance alone.
We arrived at the square where the music had already begun. Most of the grown-ups were sitting down, singing, or playing an instrument. The older kids were standing in a circle, clapping their hands but not dancing. Strange, usually the teenagers were always dancing.
When we got closer, Ramona shoved a few kids out of the way so we could join the circle. My eyes immediately went to the center of the circle and I stared in disbelief.
Anna was there dancing, all alone, performing graceful moves that none of us had ever seen before. Her midnight blue dress swayed as she twirled and kicked her bare feet. Everyone seemed thoroughly entertained by the display, smiling, clapping, and cheering.
Ramona and I glanced at each other but didn’t say a word. We watched Anna blissfully dance until the song ended.
Anna held one final pose for a second before looking around at the crowd she’d attracted. She saw me and gleefully skipped over to where I stood. She held her hand out, inviting me to dance with her.
Without hesitation, I placed my hand in her palm and let her escort me out to the center of the circle as the next song began. The way we danced was foreign to me but I just followed Anna’s lead, letting her guide me through the steps. I smiled at the masked angel as the songstress sang a shanty.
“Oh, the song of Loreley
Charms the moon right from the sky
She will get inside your mind
Lovely Loreley
When she cries
‘Be with me until the end of time’
You know you will ever be
With your Loreley”
Anna’s dance was dizzying, she spun both of us around so many times that my legs began to wobble. She kept me upright the entire time though, somehow unaffected by vertigo.
The world blurred around us and everyone else faded into the background. It was just me and Anna floating through space together as the song filled our heads.
“And the winds would cry
And many men would die
And all the waves would bow down
To the Loreley”
When the song ended I toppled over, falling into Anna’s arms. I was breathing heavily, as if I had just swam across the entire ocean.
Anna held me until I could find my footing again. I smiled at her so widely that my cheeks hurt and again I somehow knew she was smiling back.
I looked back to where I’d left Ramona standing but she was gone. My eyes searched for her in the crowd to no avail. She must have gone off somewhere on her own. It wouldn’t have been the first time, she got distracted easily.
Anna tapped on my shoulder to get my attention back. She fixed my sweater when I looked at her again, pulling up the sleeve that had fallen down my shoulder during our dance. I stared at the cat mask in front of me and an image of Anna’s face slowly faded over it until I could no longer see the mask.
Another song started soon and this time all of the older kids began dancing too. Anna twirled and danced a bit by herself. I stood still, mesmerized by her movements and a bit nervous to be in the center with the older kids. Ramona and I usually danced on the outskirts of the crowd in our own little world. I wasn’t used to being in the middle of it all.
Anna seemed to notice my hesitation. She stopped dancing, gracefully bringing her movements to a halt. She grabbed my wrist with an unexpectedly tight grip and weaved us through the crowd. She avoided all the dancing bodies with a calculated accuracy, not once bumping into someone.
We eventually broke free from the mass and Anna led me away from the square. When we reached the stairs I realized where she was taking me.
“Wait.” I stopped, causing my wrist to slip out of Anna’s grasp. She turned around and stared at me, breathing steadily, waiting for an explanation. “The ocean is dangerous at night,” I said.
“I’ll keep you safe,” Anna promised. She held her hand out, silently asking me to trust her.
Though I hesitated, I believed her. I just wanted to be around her for as long as possible. Even if it meant doing something that scared me.
I placed my hand in Anna’s and she guided me down the steps until we reached the sand. I paused to take my shoes off but Anna told me to keep them on. I questioned her but she said I would understand soon.
We stayed near the boardwalk, where it was lightest, as we ambled along the beach. Anna gently swayed our intertwined hands back and forth. She hummed one of the shanties that were playing in the square and I joined her. She had a lovely voice, soft yet powerful, just like the rest of her.
After a long time we arrived at a cluster of large rocks. I’d never gone that far on the beach so I didn’t even know it was there. Waves crashed against the furthest out rocks and water droplets flew into the air before landing with a splat. It was loud and kind of scary in the dark.
Anna stepped onto one of the smaller rocks and started climbing.
“Wait, you’ll slip,” I warned.
Anna looked over her shoulder at me and shook her head. “I’ll be okay.”
“What about me?” I didn’t want to be left behind after coming this far.
Fearlessly, Anna climbed onto the next big rock and turned around, crouching on its surface. She held her hand out, coaxing me to try.
I was scared but I took her hand anyway. I gripped it tightly for support as I stepped onto the small rock in front of me. Just like the first step of any adventure, it was easy and gave me a bit of confidence. I nodded at Anna and she pulled me up to the bigger rock she was on. It was a much higher step up and I had to propel myself upwards, meeting Anna’s movement, to get myself up.
Anna gave my hand an affirming squeeze as I stood up next to her. She led me up one rock higher and we were a few feet off the ground at that point.
I hated climbing. Ramona would always try to get me to climb trees with her in the jungle but I preferred to have my feet on the ground. I was mostly afraid to fall, something I’d seen Ramona do plenty of times. She always seemed fine, getting right back up after she hit the ground, but I didn’t believe that it would be the same case for me. My parents were always worried about me getting hurt and it made me feel frail.
As I set my back foot on the rock, my shoe gave way to the moisture on the surface and my foot slipped back a little bit.
I nearly screamed in fear and grabbed Anna’s arm with my free hand, clinging onto her like my life depended on it. Anna quickly turned to tend to me, holding me steady so I could regain my balance. I think she could tell that I was scared.
“You’re okay,” she soothed.
“I don’t wanna fall,” I yelped.
Anna paused for a moment, thinking, then nodded down at the rock. “Sit and you won’t fall.”
I listened to her, immediately sitting down. I could feel the seat of my shorts getting wet but I was so worried about falling that I didn’t care.
Anna remained standing, looking out onto the ocean before us. I watched her, noticing how still she was, her shoulders relaxed in perfect posture. The wind blew her skirt back and ruffled the top of her short hair but she didn’t seem to notice at all.
My hair was flowing in the breeze too but because it was long it quickly became tangled. Normally I would have tried to fix it with my fingers but I was too entranced by the way Anna looked.
She opened her arms as a large wave crashed against the rocks, welcoming the water as it splashed across her. She tilted her head up and she looked just like a sea witch from the fairytales I’d heard. Goddesses who controlled the ocean, always one with the waves.
We stayed there for a while, not speaking, just listening to the waves as they rose and fell against the rocks’ sides. The clouds drifted away to reveal the moon and Anna’s mask lit up under the light. For some reason, the longer I knew Anna the more the mask seemed to have expressions of its own. Of course it had the face of a smiling cat painted on it but it almost looked lonely. Lonely like me.
~~~
I slept in late again the next morning. I knew that making a habit of staying out late was bad for me but I didn’t mind losing some daylight if it meant I could be with Anna.
I got dressed, putting on my favorite fleece hoodie and some comfortable leggings, and went downstairs. My parents were already preparing sandwiches for lunch and I joined them at the table when everything was done.
“Someone came to the door this morning looking for you,” my mom said.
“Ramona?”
“No sweetie, it was a girl wearing a cat mask,” my mom explained.
“Anna,” I said, mostly to myself.
“Is she a friend of yours?” my dad asked.
“Yeah… Did she say where she was going?” I asked.
My parents exchanged a quick glance before answering. “The pier.”
I immediately stood up. I felt compelled to go look for her right away, afraid she would grow tired of waiting for me and go somewhere else. The town was small but Anna was free to go anywhere she wanted on the island, which was significantly bigger. It could take me all day to find her.
After wrapping up the remainder of my sandwich, I put it in the fridge and told my parents that I was going to the pier.
“Be careful around the water, my dear,” my mom called after me as I ran out the door.
When I arrived at the pier, I saw Anna sitting at the end of it and I breathed a sigh of relief. My shoes thumped loudly against the wood as I ran down to the end of the pier to join her.
Though she must have heard me coming, Anna didn’t show any signs of it, staying completely still as I sat down next to her. Our legs dangled off the planks as we looked out across the endless ocean.
“You slept in,” Anna said.
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay.” Anna looked at me, her hands gripping onto the edge of the plank as she leaned forward a bit. “I just wanted to see you again.”
A gasp escaped my lips when I heard those words. I wondered if that meant she felt the same way about me as I felt about her. I wondered if that was what love felt like.
Without thinking, I leaned over and wrapped my arms around Anna’s middle. I rested my head on her shoulder and closed my eyes. There were no words that could have expressed to her how I felt so a hug was the only thing that felt right.
Anna responded by placing one arm around my shoulder and rested her other hand on my head. I smiled when I felt the gentle pressure of her fingertips on my hair.
After a few moments she pulled away from me to speak again. “Can I sleep at your house tonight, Starry?”
I lifted my head to look at her. “Of course. But Anna, where have you been sleeping since you got here?” I wanted to know what she’d been doing every time she disappeared. I wanted to know if she had anyone to take care of her. Perhaps she was an orphan, left alone to fend for herself. How sad, I thought.
“Somewhere cold,” Anna answered, though that didn’t explain anything. I wanted to press her more for an answer but I knew it would be pointless. If she didn’t want to tell me, she didn’t have to. I somehow knew that she was okay, maybe just a little lost.
Fall head first like paper planes in playground games
Anna invited me to walk along the beach with her and I accepted. Then she did something that was so scary. She rose to her feet and jumped off the pier, diving into the water with perfect form.
I immediately slid backwards on the pier, pulling my feet up onto the wood. I called out to Anna in panic when she resurfaced, shaking the water out of her hair.
“Anna! Are you okay?”
She nodded, steadily treading in the water. “Come on, let’s swim to the beach. It’s just over there,” she said. She pointed toward the shore just a few feet away from her, keeping herself afloat with her other arm.
I looked over at the shoreline, considering the idea. My parents taught me how to swim but it was just as a precaution. They instructed me to never go in the water without one of them and to not even go near the water if they weren’t around. I broke that second rule a lot, like on that very day, but I never disobeyed the first one. I knew the currents could be harsh and unpredictable, even if the waves seemed calm.
Standing up, I gestured at the boardwalk behind me. “I’ll meet you there.”
Anna didn’t argue, she just started swimming in the direction of the shore. She looked like such a natural in the water. She must have had a lot of swimming practice, much more than I did.
I felt bad for not joining her as I ambled along the boardwalk. Anna wouldn’t have let me drown, right? I felt like I should have just trusted her like I did the previous night at the rocks.
By the time I reached the sand Anna was already walking out of the water. She squeezed the water out of the skirt of her dress as I approached her.
“The water is warm today,” she said.
I just smiled and nodded, a bit embarrassed about my apprehension.
The two of us walked along the beach in the direction of my house. We moved slowly, enjoying the warm afternoon sun shining down on us. During the winter it was warmest in the afternoon, when the sun was as high as it could get in the sky.
Anna held my hand for the entire journey. We didn’t talk much and when we did speak it was to share our admiration for the beautiful scenery. The deep blue water sparkled brilliantly in the sun. It reminded me of the countless crystals that Ramona kept in her room.
We stopped many times along the way to chase the waves or dance in the water. Anna was right, the ocean was warm on our feet and we twirled together on the shoreline. It was strange, the water was usually cooler around that time of year.
When the sky grew orange, indicating that the sun would slowly disappear soon, Anna suggested that we go to my house. I agreed and she led the way. I was happy that she bothered to remember where I lived since I made sure to tell her multiple times where my house was. Although she never responded the first time, I was now certain that she was listening.
We arrived at my house a lot faster than I had anticipated. It felt like we were walking at a slow, relaxed pace but we seemed to cover a lot of distance in a short amount of time.
My parents greeted us when we pranced through the front door, holding hands. I said hello and Anna waved at them. I told my parents that she was going to sleep over and they encouraged us to have fun and go to bed early.
Anna and I ate the dinner that my parents had prepared before we got back. Then I took Anna up to my room so we could relax together. I sat on my bed and Anna stood at the open balcony, gazing out at the sea. I began sorting through the pile of books that had formed on my side table, allowing my guest to do whatever she felt like doing. I wondered if Anna would want to read any of my books and a thought occurred to me. Did she even know how to read? Many fugitives who arrived on our island were unable to read. If she was a fugitive, that is. I would have been more than happy to teach her if she didn’t know.
“You have a beautiful view of the ocean,” Anna commented.
“Yeah, it’s nice that I can see it from my own room,” I agreed.
Anna stepped back into the room and closed the balcony doors, saying that it was getting late. She joined me on the bed and asked what I was doing. I explained that I was trying to organize my books. Anna picked up one of the books that I had set down beside me. She examined it, carefully inspecting the covers and flipping through the pages.
“Anna, can you read?” I asked as politely as possible. I was slightly concerned that I would offend her with such a question.
“Not your language,” Anna answered.
Since I wasn’t expecting that answer, I put the book that was currently in my hand down and turned to face Anna.
“What is your native language? I have books written in a few different languages,” I offered.
Anna glanced around at my various bookshelves. “I don’t think you will have books in my language,” she said. The tone in her voice lowered slightly at the end, as if she were feeling sorrowful.
Sensing that the subject of her native tongue was making Anna feel sad, I tried to shift the conversation a bit.
“How did you learn to speak Esalezian?” I asked.
“The sailors taught me.”
That was the second time she had mentioned the sailors. I began to wonder how and why she had spent so much time with sailors. Was it possible that she was on a ship with them? A ship full of sailors was no place for a child like her. It was dangerous work.
The last time I asked Anna to elaborate on the sailors, she was uncooperative and changed the subject. I figured the same thing might happen if I ask again, so I just left it.
“I can teach you to read Esalezian, if you’d like,” I offered.
Anna tilted her head just slightly to the side, raising her shoulders a barely noticeable amount, and I could tell she was smiling. She nodded and I shuffled closer to her on the mattress. I thought the book that was already in my hand would do just fine. It was one of my favorites and it was easy to read.
Our little lesson went well, Anna turned out to be an incredibly fast learner. We did have a rocky start when it became apparent that Anna was unfamiliar with the alphabet of my language. Thankfully, Anna was able to quickly memorize all of the letters and what sounds they made. The next step was putting the letters together into words and dissecting the sound they would produce together. Anna recognized a lot of the words as soon as she was able to read them outloud. She seemed happy to finally know what the words she’d been saying looked like when they were written out.
We stopped our lesson a while after night had fallen. I suggested that we go to bed and Anna sleepily agreed. I offered her comfortable clothes to sleep in, assuming she only had that one dress. She was hesitant but eventually accepted the clothes.
When we finally settled into bed, I noticed that Anna was still wearing her mask. I asked if she was going to take it off to sleep, since that would have been more comfortable.
“Someone might see me while I’m sleeping,” she said.
“It’s just us in here. My parents won’t come in without knocking,” I told her.
“It’s dangerous.” Anna’s voice was calm with no sign of fear.
“Okay,” I said. If she was more comfortable with the mask on, then I wasn’t going to force her. I did have one itching curiosity though. “Can I see your face again?”
Anna didn’t answer but she stared at me with attention. Her breathing was still calm and rhythmic, so she couldn’t have been angered.
“Just for a moment?” I bargained. “I really want to see you one more time.”
Anna sat up and gestured for me to sit up too. She shifted closer to the center of the bed and I followed suit. Somehow, we still managed to keep a small space between us, precisely in the center of the mattress. We faced each other, sitting in the exact same way with our legs crossed. Mirror images of each other, separated by an invisible line on my bed.
Just as carefully as she had last time, Anna lifted her mask and let it rest on the top of her head.
I was immediately lost in her beauty again. It was even more wonderful than before, like it was my first time ever seeing her face. Just looking at her felt like the first inhale of fresh air after holding your breath for as long as you could. It felt like drinking cold water when you’ve been thirsty all day. Like being wrapped in a soft blanket on a harsh, windy night.
I felt so relaxed yet so excited. In her eyes I saw both adventure and home. The color of them, the prettiest color I had ever seen in my life, pulled me in. I leaned closer to her, my nose grazing that invisible barrier separating us.
Anna leaned in too. Her expression was welcoming, inviting me to get closer. As much as I wanted to, I found myself unable to move at all.
So we burst into colors
It was Anna who broke through the barrier, connecting our lips together in a gentle kiss. I closed my eyes to relax into it and found my mind ablaze with color. Colors I loved and colors I had never seen before. They danced through my blacked out vision like flames, wildly flickering. It was the most extraordinarily beautiful display I had ever seen. Could that be what love is?
Anna pulled away from the kiss first and when I opened my eyes, her face was still there in front of me. Though her expression was mostly neutral, her eyes were squinted and her cheeks were raised ever so slightly. I knew she was happy, just as I was.
After letting me look at her for a moment longer, Anna reached up and delicately pulled the mask back down.
“Thank you,” I said, though I wasn’t sure why.
Next thing, we’re touching
“We should sleep,” Anna said. She took my hand in hers and held them up between us. Her fingers interlaced with mine until we were locked together.
We both smiled -I know she smiled- and fell to our sides onto the comfort of the mattress. Anna rolled onto her back to get more comfortable but she never let go of my hand. We drifted off soon, hands held tightly together for the whole night.
