#stillewrites

[stillebesat]

You ever have that moment in your dreams where there's this amazing monologue being said and you desperately want to recall it in its entirety so that you can write it down to use in a scene somewhere, but you already know that upon waking most of it will be forgotten and what you do manage to write down won't be as great as what was said in your dream? Had that last night.

Like:

"There's a curse to loving a human because you need their warmth to keep living, to feel the heat within you. But humans age. They grow old. They die. And you'll be tempted to turn them. To make them like you. So that they stay with you forever. But if you do...they will leave you anyways. Because we need warmth to survive. And you cannot provide it to them on your own. They will leave. The love between you will grow cold. Because they too will be searching for that heat of life. For the warmth that fills them. And you cannot provide it. So either way. If you love a human...you will lose them in the end."

[stillebesat]

Have to say, it's quite fun to write in public spaces when no one but you knows what's being put down on the page.

[stillebesat]

I've been in writer's mode for too long. I'm seeing potential real life plots/tropes in the people sitting nearby.* 

1. There's a guy sitting across from me facing me, laptop on his table while I'm sitting one table over jotting down ideas in a notebook. All it will take is six more similar scenarios before we look up, meet each other's eyes and fall instantly in love. Or you know I could trip and spill his soda as I'm walking by or something. 

2. Another guy in a black bowler hat sits across the room, munching his hamburger, contemplating the meaning of life. He's probably a once famous jazz musician waiting for someone to recognize him and ask him to teach them how to be a true jazz master. He of course refuses at first cus he's a grumpy guy, but eventually gives in and shows his tender heart. 

3. Another gentleman wearing the grey coat of a man who is either a fisherman or a vagrant came in to grab a hamburger and is currently treasuring each and every bite of his sandwich as if its the only warmth he's going to experience today. 

4. Another gentleman with the plaid shirt and glasses of a science/chemistry teacher comes in, a smile on his face, a glint to his eyes as he orders "the usual" yet gives off the impression that he can't wait to use whatever he just ordered for his newest series of experiments. Halfway expected him to pull out a flask and a Bunsen burner then and there, but perhaps he learned early on that experimenting in the dining area sets off the sprinkler system easily and nearly got himself banned in the process.

5. Never really thought the trope of "whiny teenage fashionista” was a thing, but the girl nearby has complained nonstop for fifteen minutes about her shoes being ruined after she spilled her drink. 

*observations were made pre-pandemic. 

[stillebesat]

Another chip, another blow.

Today my bucket found another hole.

A drip. A drop.

Takes everything I got.

To smile. And pretend.

That it's okay. It'll soon end.

Where's a patch? Where's a hose?

Who knows when the leaks will close.

So here I go, and toil away.

Hoping my bucket will be filled today.

Yet the sun has set. The bucket's dry.

I huddle in my room, and silently cry.

For where is the water I desperately need?

To nourish my own growing seed?

Gone to others. Gone away.

Nothing's left for me this day.

[stillebesat]

Chapter 1: *nice and short*

Chapter 2: *nice and short*

Chapter 3: *super long monstrosity*

Chapter 4: *nice and short*

Chapter 5: *nice and short*

[stillebesat]

That moment when a spider suddenly appears next to you on the couch and you nearly throw your laptop to the ground as you scramble to get away from it and it disappears underneath the cushion but instead of burning the couch to ashes you just move onto a nearby couch and give the spider its space and after a while the spider comes out onto the couch cushion and is just chilling six feet away from you because at least the spider respects social distancing in these trying times but then your roommate comes upstairs and sits down next to the spider without seeing said spider because the spider is partially hidden by a pillow and is nearly the same color as the couch and now you’re trying to hold a normal conversation with your roommate while also waiting for the inevitable axe to drop where they will notice notice the spider and freak out and spill their drink everywhere before they squish it and you’re regretting not capturing the spider before because the anticipation of what is to come is unbearable but somehow you manage to get the roommate to move off the couch and continue your conversation elsewhere without them noticing or disturbing the spider before they head back downstairs and you figure that’s two close calls too many for the poor creature so you capture it in a jar and toss it outside where it will be safe from being squished. 

[stillebesat]

Stille’s Fics

All my FanFics can be found on Ao3 under the name: NikaylaSarae <3 

For Sanders Sides you can find an updated list of my fics on Tumblr at: Stille’s Master Post  For DCMK you can find an updated list of my fics on Tumblr at: Stille’s DCMK Master Post

<3 -Stille

[stillebesat]

It started like this.

A hope.

A smile.

A dream.

A kiss.