It's funny how the same people who use exaggerated internet speech to try to make fun of you, will also drag me because i use the same exaggeration to express genuine fear and rage about an actual experience I had. To be fair I posted it in the "feminist" tag mostly to fuel fire, but maybe if I write the exact same post with different wording people might understand.
So I ride the bus nearly every day, my job often leaves me to take the bus at 12:30 - 1am. Simply being outside at this time can make a person uneasy. Even just seeing another human being walking across the street makes me nervous, even if I can't really tell what they look like because I never wear my glasses. It is simply common sense to be aware off all other human beings i encounter at this time because it is "The Stabbing Hour" in Winnipeg, homicide capital of Canada.
So, on top of the general sense of uneasy that every night bus ride brings, seeing a group of 3 or more drunk, belligerent to the bus driver, larger than me in height and width, men stumbling onto the bus my brain starts to panic. Especially because on the nealy empty bus they choose to sit directly behind me. They then continue to poke my BARE shoulder, several times as I sit with my headphones in slowly leaning as far forward as I can giving off all the "don't fucking touch me" vibes I can give off subconsciously because I've been here before and asking fuckos like this to leave you alone is the worst choice. So I ignore them until they pull my earphone out at which point I grab my bag and storm to the closest seat to the bus driver. Doing all this to a (mostly muted because im trying to listen to music) chorus of: "wtf chill", "stupid bitch", "come back".
So needless to say I am already freaked out and fucking furious but all i desperately want is to go home and sleep. So my stop comes up and I pull the chord to stop the driver and I hear all the drunk fucks get up and stand creepily behind me. Now of course there is the possibility that these guys do need to get off at this stop, but I doubt it and i cant take that chance so when we get to the stop I apologize to the driver and say im on the next stop, but they dont get off either. So these fucks are actually trying to follow me. It's at this point that i do what i do best and make a fake phone call. "Hey babe! Are you still up? Could you come pick me up at the bus stop? Thanks, love you!" Which is a technique ive used several times and it always works. I get off the bus one stop late and the creeps stay on. Hallelujah not assaulted, but I totally could have been and that scares the shit out of me. So you know how I know those fucks hate women? Because their behavior speaks for them. They didn't respect my space, didn't respect boundaries, didn't need to fucking poke me (literally it doesnt matter who you are or for what purpose, dont touch a stranger. even a poke. im serious. I have never had a need to poke somebody on the bus ONCE, yet i have had complete randos poke me to get my attention 3-4 separate time. I dont care if ive dropped something i dont care if my shirt tag is out, i dont care if you need the time LEAVE ME ALONE!)
These men were annoying me to the verge of verbal harassment, they were doing it because they thought it was funny. They were doing it because they want to feel better about themselves and if they behave like this to me it DOES NOT MATTER if they treat their girlfriend right, or take care of their sister. The fundamentally not believe that all women deserve respect, deserve to feel safe, and deserve to make choices about who they want to speak with.
And you know why I "felt the need to make this post"? Because i was genuinely scared, even if i wasnt assaulted or harassed more severely I could have been. So when you see my fury and my exaggeration and you think for once second I was talking about poking somebody to let them know they dropped their headphones then you are mistaken. I was shouting my disgust into the universe with the hope that somehow it would stop creeps from following girls home. If you couldn't read between the lines and see that i'm not talkig about "looking at a woman on the bus" or even "talking to a woman on the bus" then it's my fault for rushing into the post at like 2am post panic attack but hey, if it makes you feel better to pardon my creepers than it is to admit that these behaviours are misogynistic regardless of whether or not you actively hate women individually. Which btw ingrained hatred of women is literally the definition of misogyny.
