#stupidtwilight

[meandmyfuckedupfangirlmind-blog]

Angel and Spike Meet Alucard

Spike: *Sits down at bar*

Spike: Whiskey.

*Bartender hands him drink*

Spike: *Downs shot and looks left. Seeing...*

Spike: Angel. Long time no see.

Angel: Spike.

Angel: *Takes swig of own drink*

Angel: Personally I was hoping for longer.

Spike: C'mon. Don't be like that.

Angel: What am I supposed to be like then?

Voice out of view: How about civil?

Angel and Spike: *Look right to see a lanky man with messy black hair and red coat sitting a few stools down from Spike. He has a large red hat on the bar beside him.*

Spike: Just who do you think you are, butting into other people's conversations?

Alucard: Hn.

Alucard: *Smirks, revealing pointed incisors*

Angel: You're a-

Alucard: Vampire. Yes. And so are you. Both of you.

Alucard: *Picks up hat and drink and moves to the empty stool to the right of Spike*

Angel: What's your name?

Alucard: Alucard. And yours?

Angel: Angel.

Spike: Spike.

Alucard: *Chuckles*

Alucard: A paradox and a weapon. I suppose that's fitting.

Spike: Are our names funny to you?

Alucard: Somewhat.

Angel and Spike: *Stare at Alucard*

Voice out of view: Hey! Get that light off me!

*All three turn to look at the speaker, who turns out to be a young man who sparkles in the light. It goes away and they look back at each other*

Angel: I thought this was a 'Vampires Only' bar.

Spike: It is.

Spike: *Under breath* Sparkling Twilight pouf.

Alucard: You know, I used to hear tell of two vampires who would aid the Slayer. That wouldn't be you two, would it?

Alucard: *Looks at Spike and Angel over tinted glasses*

Angel: Yeah, actually.

Spike: And I've heard of a vampire who works for that Hellsing Organization. That you?

Alucard: *Smirks*

Alucard: Are you two thinking what I'm thinking?

Alucard: *Reaches into coat and starts pulling out a pistol*

Spike: *Cracks knuckles*

Angel: Hell yeah.

*They stand up*

Spike: HEY CULLEN!

[intimidatingrestingface-blog]

Thought Provoking Question

When my sister and I finally saw Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2, we caught it 30 minutes in on TV. Not that we cared, because we were really only watching it to see Lee Pace and his amazing eyebrows. Anyways, every 30 seconds when some character said something we would turn to each other and be like: "wait, what?", "what?", "waaaiiit, what!?!"... And that was the movie. But even better, my dad walks in half way through and starts asking questions we have no answers to. Then he finds out that Edward and Bella have a baby. "How can they have a baby, how does that work?" He wonders. And my sister and I are like: we got this. We know next to nothing about Twilight, but we know this. Edward and Bella had a baby while she was still human, because apparently dead vampires can not hold little growing beings in their tummies. But no, my dad was actually wondering: "How can Edward father a child? If he's dead how does that work?" Out of all the questions of the night, this was the one that made my mouth drop in a wondering smile. How can Edward, with his dead ancient dangly bits, procreate?

[squigglywig]