#superhero fights

[jessebatson]

Newt Scamander has spent his life dealing with dangerous creatures. From demiguises to bowtruckles to nundus. Yes, autocorrect -- I meant to say nundus. If it has teeth, claws, or venom, he's probably encountered something similar.

But the Xenomorph is different. This isn't an animal that can be calmed down or reasoned with. It's a perfect predator. It's incredibly fast and extremely aggressive. Even when its opponents do injure it, they have to be careful because of the acidic blood.

Obviously, Newt has an advantage being a magician. He’s got spells to deal with hairy situations. Newt has access to stunning spells, binding charms, shielding magic, and explosive curses. 

While the Xenomorph is physically superior in every way, it has no defense against magic. The biggest question is whether Newt can react quickly enough.

The Xenomorph rushes him immediately. Newt throws up a shield charm, but the impact sends him stumbling backward. The creature leaps again, this time striking with its tail. Newt barely dodges as the razor-sharp point swipes past his head.

At that point, Newt realizes he's not dealing with a creature he can safely subdue. Newt abandons any thought of containing it and switches to more aggressive magic.

As the Xenomorph charges a third time, Newt snaps his wand forward. A powerful binding spell locks the creature in place for just a moment — long enough for Newt to follow up with a devastating blasting curse.

The alien collapses before it can break free. Newt stands over the creature. Despite being grateful to be alive, he can’t help but wish it could have ended differently.

Winner: Newt Scamander 🪄

[ben-talks-art]

Seeing that Mark vs. Conquest fight in "Invincible" today made me realize "Man we have so many freaking animated fights featuring characters with super strength and flight destroying the city through their battles... Most of them with Superman, sure, but still..."

Superman vs. Captain Marvel

Superman vs. Clone Superman

The Avengers vs Gravitron

Clark vs Drax

Wonder Woman vs. Deimos

The Conquest fight was still really cool but I'm kinda growing numb to the premise.

[vigilantsycamore]

My attitude towards super fights and other such contests is that the ideal outcome is the one that makes all participants look as cool as possible

Like, if characters A and B are fighting and A has a clear advantage

The obvious outcome is "A wins easily" but. Not only does getting their ass kicked make B look uncool, the easy win means A doesn't really get to show off how cool they are

The reverse outcome of "B wins easily" would ruin what could have been a cool victory for B by making it seem contrived or by making it seem like a far more even match than it was, while making A seem uncool and making all of A's fans mad at you

But "B wins, but A makes sure it's a difficult fucking fight" makes B look freaking awesome for triumphing over near-impossible odds and lets A show off how formidable they are because look how hard B had to work to beat them. The reverse outcome has a similar appeal, and you could argue that the overall coolness levels are the same, but I'd say the version I described here is better

[capecomicenjoyer]

Batgirl (volume 1) #25 by Kelley Puckett and  Damion Scott

[primepanels]

Superman/Batman Friendship Example #3

I love this. This is the best of Tom King.

From Superman: Up in the Sky

[howtohero]

#124 Superhero Civil Wars

Sometimes friends fight. It’s a natural part of a friendship’s lifecycle. Perhaps one of the friends made a really disparaging “yo mama” joke. Maybe one of the friends refused to share their super cool, limited edition, skateboard (again, it’s a collector’s item, and you don’t know how to skateboard, I have plenty of junker skateboards you can use to practice if you’d like). Mayhaps one of the friends whooped the other in Shooty Shooty Army Men 3 for the Gamestation so bad that their friendship just disintegrated. Nick, if you’re reading this, I forgive you for being such a sore loser that time I totally whooped you in Shooty Shooty Army Men 3 for the Gamestation. When it comes to friendly spats, superheroes are no different.  

Well they’re slightly different. You see superheroes, by their very nature, are very dramatic people. You kind of have to be when you dress in all the colors of the rainbow and create fireworks from your fingers. It just goes with the territory. So when they fight with one another they do it in a very dramatic way. When two superheroes get into an argument it becomes a whole gosh darn international affair. Every single superhero in the world is forced to choose a side in these two morons’ petty argument. If you want to stay neutral you have to somehow get off the planet. Magna Carter once stowed away on a UKSA rocket ship just to avoid having to choose between Ultiman’s pro-double-dipping-if-you’re-the-only-one-eating-from-the-garlic-mayo-at-the-superhero-salad-bar-which-is-definitely-a-thing team and Hatman’s double-dipping-is-wrong-on-principle-and-just-because-no-one-else-is-eating-garlic-mayo-now-doesn’t-mean-somebody-isn’t-going-to-come-in-later-and-want-some-garlic-mayo team. 

Once the battle lines are drawn one team will inevitably have to go on the run. Sometimes it’s because the governments of the world inevitably end up falling on one side or the other (and any government with a superhuman head of state has to be sorted onto one team or the other unless they want to flee the planet/dimension). There may even be a law passed that essentially makes one of the teams illegal! (Though again, everyone here is a vigilante, you’re all illegal anyhow.) Other times it’s because they’ve studied war history and understand that armies who are constantly on the move and fight through guerilla warfare (or as in the case of Team Hatman, gorilla warfare thanks to the Gorilla Twins) have a better shot at winning than the ones who make public appearances eschewing “the importance of having the freedom to double dip if it’s not hurting anybody you gatekeeping, beanie-loving twit.”

If the fight goes on without either side seeming to give up any ground, then the fight may escalate. Now, I’m sure you’re wondering how a fight about dips could possibly escalate further than half of the world’s superheroes having to go underground to protect their rights to have unsullied garlic mayo, but these superheroes are petty as anything and they will refuse to admit they’re wrong unless made to. So one side will start building a prison. Yep. A prison to imprison the people who wish to restrict their garlic mayo usage. And not even a nice prison at that! These superhero prisons are the worst of the worst. They have to be if they want to be able to hold people like Titanium Pig Man or La Varox (the French volcano woman). So these prisons have state-of-the-art power dampeners, tiny cells, and robot guards who have never particularly cared for the concept of hats anyway. (In the robots’ view, hair is this amazing, unattainable thing, so anybody who decides to cover that hair with a hat is a fool who deserves to be imprisoned.) 

But of course, such prisons would not be able to stand in view of the world’s common folk, who know and love these superheroes. So they’re often built in pocket dimensions. This way they’re far away from the public eye and also even if the captured heroes manage to escape (which is unlikely, there’s a hallway full of moving chainsaws on the way out,) they’d still be stuck in another dimension! Brilliant!

With the team that’s on the run’s numbers quickly dwindling, due to either being captured or not caring enough about garlic mayo to risk getting thrown into another dimension, it is likely that they’ll seek to bolster their numbers in other ways. Depending on how kind the public has been to Para-Folk since their introduction to society, the fugitive team might have luck reaching out to some disenfranchised members of the various Para-Folk species. They also might not. Sewer-mutants, for example, generally don’t even like garlic mayo, so you’d have to appeal to them on the merit that double dipping at a public event is unsanitary… and, well, they live in sewers. It is also likely that, in desperation, the anti-double dippers will turn to the supervillain community to give them an edge. I’m sure that will end well.

On the flipside though, the pro-double dipping team will also turn to the aid of supervillains. Specifically, supervillains that they’ve captured and placed in the horrifying pocket dimension prison who are so desperate to get out that they’ll cut a deal with the dippers to work for them in exchange for being placed in a regular Earth prison when the civil war is over. Because apparently dragging every single superhero in the world wasn’t enough for these two knuckleheads, now they’ve gone and brought in supervillains too. (They make individual garlic mayo packets this doesn’t need to be an issue! {Spoken like a true anti-double dipper.} What?) 

With each side continually raising the bar and raising the stakes (and raising the roof at those classic pro-double dipping raves which are definitely the real deal. {Don’t try to pretend you’re a pro-double dipper now all of a sudden.} Excuse me!) The only way to resolve these issues is to one have good no-holds barred epic clash between the two opposing sides. Hatman finally steps from the darkness with his lieutenants, Cowboy Rockstar and Captain Patriot (a shrewd choice, as the appearance of Cowboy Rockstar, the coolest person to ever live, will undoubtedly sway many more heroes to Hatman’s side {You’re so transparent}). Ultiman comes to meet him flanked by Armored Atlas and, what’s this? Hatboy! (A terrible blow, Hatman’s own child sidekick has sided against him in this horrible horrible war). With all of the main players on the board the fight can begin. There will be punches, scratches, scrapes, one lunatic brought a sword to this thing. It’s wild. As the fight goes on more and more superheroes and villains and assorted para-folk will emerge to join the fray. That one guy who assumes that everybody who wears a costume is a secret werewolf will probably make an appearance and shoot a few guys. Someone will reveal that they’ve stockpiled a ton of some other superhero’s weakness. Personal secrets will be shared and insults will be hurled. Someone will throw a truck. A classic maneuver. 

These fights should be held in an out of the way location to cut down on collateral damage and also because come on, this is a bit embarrassing. Some place like an abandoned harbor or perhaps an abandoned airport will do just fine. You should not, under any circumstances, be throwing down in like Times Square or something. We can’t be putting innocent lives at risk. Don’t be foolish. 

Eventually though, as with all things, this ridiculous civil war must come to an end. One good way for these things is for one of the team leaders to go and have their mother change their name to the same name as the other leader’s mother. It’s a very nice gesture and it is sure to do away with any lingering negative feelings. Another thing you can do is create an entire new universe. This way there can be one reality where double-dipping is allowed, and one where it is not. I think you’ll find that most disputes can be solved by simply creating a new reality. Sometimes these disputes are ended when someone accidentally gets killed (no one important don’t worry), leaving the other heroes with the sobering reality that hey, maybe it doesn’t really matter what people do with their garlic mayo (as long as they don’t double-dip! {I knew it!}). Sometimes these disputes never end until one of the team leaders just up and decides to take over the entire world and then enforce his team’s views on everybody. Regardless, these things can’t last forever. 

[jessebatson]

Krypto has gotten a lot of attention the past few months, getting a lot of screen time in the 2025 version of Superman. My thoughts on the movie aside, Krypto had a lot of screen time and showcased a few different abilities.

Meanwhile, Goose is the — as it turns out — female cat-alien, or alien-cat, from Captain Marvel and The Marvels. Goose appeared to simply be a cat that clawed Nick Fury in the face. As it turns out, Gus is an alien with a five tentacles instead of a tongue.

Now, looking at it on paper, it seems like Krypto may have more of a chance here. He’s got speed, flight, at least a little amount of strength (enough to chomp on metal robot drones with ease). But what is the level of strength we’re talking here? That’s a little more unclear. He’s got enough strength to carry Mr. Terrific through the sky on his back.

But let’s turn back to Goose. She seemingly just swallows up anything she wants. That means people, aliens, and objects. Not a problem. They all go to the pocket dimension inside of her body. That’s the power of the Flerken race.

So what happens when Goose faces Krypto? Well, Goose immediately unleashes the tentacles when Krypto gets too close. I think Krypto will avoid the tentacles for the moment. But Goose will go on the offense and unleash the tentacles again — entangling Krypto. Now, Krypto could potentially break free, but what is the strength level? Can he break out?

I don’t know. He’ll put up a fight, but I could theoretically see Goose swallowing Krypto up and sending him to a new dimension. I mean, Krypto was no genius in Superman. He was actually pretty stupid, so Goose seems to have the intelligence edge here. It’s just a matter of strength. I may be off base here, but if Goose can swallow up human-sized aliens and people of all strengths and sizes, Krypto loses this match.

Winner: Goose

[jessebatson]

Flames, steel, magic, and blades — all in one arena. Today, we’re seeing Daemon Targaryen, Lucius Malfoy, Prince Nuada, Thranduil, and Geralt of Rivia clash in free-for-all.

Daemon initiates the exchange, Valyrian steel glinting as he charges forward.

Prince Nuada meets him with a blade of his own. He doesn’t wait for Daemon to get a feel for him. Steel meets steel as Nuada strikes with speed that simultaneously worries Daemon and earns his respect.

Thranduil then steps in, bringing his own two swords to the fight. He intercepts Prince Nuada directly, blades colliding in a rapid exchange of flowing strikes and evasive turns, each testing the other’s speed as their duel cuts straight through the battlefield’s chaos.

Geralt moves silently, reading the chaos, sword in hand.

Lucius steps back, unamused, raises his wand and sends blasts sharply toward the melee. 

The sword fighting stops after the onslaught of spells. One blast tears past Geralt’s shoulder, close enough to scorch stone beside him.

Geralt’s head snaps toward Lucius. That was close enough. He thrusts his hand forward, releasing a sudden telekinetic shock that rips across the ground, forcing Lucius to stagger back. Geralt draws his sword and advances - quickly!

He launches a brief flame burst from his sword, forcing Lucius to dodge while shielding himself.

Nuada, Daemon, and Thranduil pause their own fighting and watch the Witcher and the wizard.

Geralt ducks under another wand blast, slashing Lucious’ leg with his sword while doing so. A final downward strike knocks the wand from his hand. 

Lucius freezes, realizing he’s beaten; Geralt steps back, keeping his blade ready.

Thranduil tries to take advantage of the moment, spinning toward Nuada with a quick strike, but Nuada is too quick. He counters with a flurry of rapid swings. Thranduil jumps and spins in midair, narrowly avoiding a lethal strike. 

Meanwhile, Daemon assesses the fight, recognizing the growing chaos and the Witcher’s mastery of magical-enhanced combat. He steps back, repositioning carefully while keeping his blade ready.

Nuada presses the attack on Thranduil, forcing him back with a flurry of swings. One swing drives across Thranduil’s side, striking a vital point. The elf king collapses.

Nuada then turns his full fury on the nearby Geralt. He’s having a hard time keeping up with Nuada, but Geralt braces and thrusts his sword forward, releasing a quick Aard blast that knocks Nuada off his feet.

Geralt immediately follows up with a swinging strike that catches the elf across the back.

Then Geralt calls on Igni as flames lick from his sword. Nuada rolls under a high swing and counters by trying to slash Geralt’s leg. Geralt reacts too quickly, bringing his sword down directly onto Nuada’s leg, though.

Geralt strengthens himself behind Quen, absorbing a spinning strike and then spinning low to sweep Nuada off balance before landing a final strike that sends him crashing unconscious.

Daemon sees his chance with his Valyrian steel in hand. He races towards Geralt, but the Witcher plants his feet and slams Yrden into the ground, creating a glowing circle that slows Daemon’s movement.

Geralt steps into the opening and brings his sword across the dragon prince’s shoulder.

Daemon swings again, but Geralt ducks under the blow, kicks dirt into his face, and delivers a crushing combination of blows that leave him collapsed and beaten on top of Nuada.

Winner: Geralt of Rivia 🗡️🔥