A purple field mouse called Edgar sat in his boat on a lake and pondered his premature hair loss. A sea monster came along and told him that he got 25% off his car insurance with GEICO. That's great, Edgar said. But what about my hair? The sea monster gave him some hair cream that the monster has purchased. It had advertised to grow hair on any animal but it didn't work on him probably because of the scales. Edgar thanked him and then applied all the hair cream all at once to his body without reading the directions. He grew so much hair that people would have thought it was a hair kelp forest if they'd have seen it. But what could he do with all this hair! It was too much for one field mouse. So he weaved it into purple cloth and sold it to kings and queens. And that's why kings and queens wear purple. Because of a purple field mouse named Edgar who had too much purple hair.
