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“With Friends Like Yours, Who Needs Enemies?”

AN: I️ am toooootally not projecting even just a teeny bit at some point here haha

-Jimmy knows his friends are just joking around when they mess with him, but are they really just kidding or are they all secretly against him.-

Here’s a read more because jfc this is long

Jimmy had no clue what had just happened, but that wasn’t really that unusual for him. What was unusual though, was waking up in a dark, cramped, dry room, devoid of anything comforting like the murky waters or soothing slime of the Swamp Empire. “You can do this Jimmy. You’re the Codfather, ruler of the strongest empire in the land.” He told himself quietly, only really half believing it. He started to panic and fumbled around in his satchel to find a torch but found nothing. He then realized that most of his stuff was missing from his satchel. His breathing got heavier as he started to panic even more and rummaged through the pockets created by nooks and crannies of his armored scales. He breathed a sigh of relief as he found what he was looking for. It was a poppy given to him be Scott after he had taken him on that little da- no it wasn’t a date it was just an alliance meeting. Jimmy couldn’t let himself get his hopes up too much about him. The poppy was a little bit crumpled and squished. That was weird because it managed to stay in pristine condition no matter how many times Jimmy accidentally drowned in his own Cod Sanctuary or fell off the Great Wall of Cod. It was probably irrelevant, he was just glad he still had it and that it was in tact. Jimmy’s ear fins perked up as he felt a presence approach from what felt like everyone all at once. His dorsal fin spikes shot up like the hair on the back of a human’s neck when something scary was approaching. That told him it was a hostile presence. A zombie, or perhaps a creeper? Or even worse a dreaded Salmon. Jimmy shivered at the thought of encountering a Salmon in these conditions. “He doesn’t love you back the way you love him, you know?” Said a distorted voice that seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere all at once. Jimmy froze, this was one of the few things worse than Salmon, which meant it could only be one thing… Xornoth.

Jimmy had never been more glad to be a fish because otherwise he thought he might need a change of pants trousers. Jimmy drew in a deep breath and finally gathered the courage to speak. “Wh- What do you want, Xornoth?” Jimmy asked, trying to sound tough but knowing that he probably sounded more like a newly hatched fish. “Well other than the usual world domination, getting revenge on my brother would be quite nice.” Xornoth said, seeming to hiss right into Jimmy’s brain.

Ok ok ok so I️ have like 30 million different ideas like usual

Stress + dry empty environment leads to dehydration. L”even if your so called friends did care enough to go looking for you they’d never find you”. He sends a seabling message to Lizzie and Lizzie gets it while teaching her axolotls that are all at little underwater desks and has a faint memory from long ago about having to rescue Jimmy after getting that same sort

Jimmy was terrified that he’d dry up in this small dark dehydrating cave. Terrified that he’d die alone in here and not wake up this time. That fear of dying and never waking up was weirdly familiar. Without his usual supply of watery slime he’d dry up in no time with Xornoth no doubt staring at him. He decided that, despite potentially making himself look weak (not that he wasn’t already used to do that), his best bet was to curl into a ball to conserve moisture. As he did so, he remembered that Scott had given him an enchanted earring. Jimmy had put it on a necklace made of enchanted seaweed and poppies. With trembling webbed hands he unclamped the earring and looked at it or at least tried to in this dark environment. Scott had told him to use it in an emergency. As he held it, it slowly began to grow to the size of an average potion, not that Jimmy knew anything about brewing. What he did know about this potion though, made his heart sink. An Awkward Potion, a Mundane Potion, a Thick Potion. “Just like me.” He thought. “Awkward and mundane.” He sighed. “My brother gave you a useless gift. Fitting for someone as useless to your so called friends as you are.” The air whispered in his ears. Something inside Jimmy kept whispering water, water, water. At first he just assumed that was just his body’s desperate plea for water. Then he remembered exactly what the awkwardly thick mundane potion was. Water. He immediately chugged the entire bottle and instantly felt more hopeful.

Jimmy felt the potion’s water flow through him. “Thank Aeor and the Cod Gods.” He said under his breath.

“I️ wouldn’t bother if I️ were you. Your so called friends aren’t coming to your rescue and even if they were they’d never find you.” Xornoth said

“Xornoth what the heck do you want from me?” Jimmy asked with the newfound semblance of courage he’d gotten from the watery potion.

“Well for starters you’re the easiest to pick on. Even your so called friends know that. That’s why they bully you, you’re the weakest empire.” Xornoth answered.

“No. They’re my friends it’s just friendly banter. They’re my friends for a reason.” Jimmy said, not about to let Xornoth start messing with his head. He’d have an existential crisis about this later when he wasn’t being held hostage by a terrifying demon.

“Mm? And what reason is that? They’re only friends with you out of pity. You bring nothing to the table for them.” Xornoth told him coldly.

“Did you know there are three different types of true cod in the world? There a lot of relatives of cod that are commonly called cod but aren’t actually part of the genus called Gadus.” Jimmy said to Xornoth suddenly.

“What- I️ totally knew that but just don’t care.” Xornoth lied.

“There’s the Atlantic Cod aka Gadus Morhua, the Pacific Cod aka Gadus Macrocephalus, and the Greenland Cod aka Gadus Ogac.” Jimmy continued. He knew that when all else failed (which with his luck, things tended to go wrong a lot) talk about cod.

“Shut it, fish face!” Xornoth snapped. Tentacles like miniature versions of the ones caused by Xornoth’s corruption, started to wrap around Jimmy’s ankles and wrists and slowly started moving up towards his head and his tail. The tentacles somehow felt so much worse than he’d expected, not that he’d known what to expect given he was too cautious to ever touch the tentacles at the swamp. They felt like dead polluted coral, and created a dry burning sensation like it too. How did he know exactly what dead polluted coral felt like?

He suddenly had a very faint memory of him playing playing in the coral reefs long ago while Lizzie floated a few meters away crafting a sweater out of seaweed. Lizzie must have taken her eye off him for a little bit too long as he somehow ended up in Salmon Territory. That must’ve been when he’d first encountered that polluted coral. It was also the first time he’d done something else. A cry for help. He didn’t remember what exactly had happened while he was in Salmon Territory only that it was somewhat traumatic and that Lizzie his big strong older sister had come to his rescue. He now knew what he needed to do. “My friends will come for me I know it.” He said to the darkness that surrounded him. As the tentacles slid up his neck, rubbing painfully against his gills, he let out a noise that sounded to him like dying dolphin. Xornoth laughed at the seemingly feeble noise but it echoed across the land and ocean to its destination… the Ocean Empire.

It was just another normal day in the Ocean Kingdom, or so Lizzie thought. She was teaching her axolotls some of the latest techniques for killing chickens (courtesy of Joel). They were in an underwater cave and the axolotls were all floating at little school desks very adorably. Most of them weren’t paying attention but she loved all of them anyway. “Chickens are very stupid and they suck according to King Joel-“ Lizzie was saying but stopped short as she heard a far off noise. It sounded almost like a dolphin in distress except much more familiar. As if a dolphin in distress wasn’t bad enough, she felt a searing pain ripple from the tip of her head fin to the tip of her tail fin. It felt familiar.

She suddenly had a faint memory from long ago. Jimmy had been playing in the coral reef and she must’ve taken her eye off him for too long because the next thing she knew, he had wandered off. It was then that she heard that cry for help. She’d found Jimmy in Salmon Territory surrounded by Salmon and their dead polluted coral. She was so upset at the Salmon that she was easily able to fight them off and rescue Jimmy. She also remembered that that night Jimmy had asked her if he was “broken”. She’d of course told him he wasn’t, just that his egg had been damaged but he was perfect just the way he was.

Her external gills that sometimes acted like a cat’s whiskers or even like antenna twitched nervously.

“Is everything ok, Queen Lizzie?” One of the axolotls asked, raising their tiny little hand/paw.

“No. Something is very very wrong. I️ think Jimmy is in grave danger.” Lizzie answered truthfully. The axolotl looked at her with worry on their face.

“May I️ suggest a search party?” Another axolotl asked.

Lizzie slowly shook her head. “No this mission is too dangerous for trainees. I’m going to need some help.” She said.

“Oh boy. Here we go.” The axolotl sighed jokingly.

“Yep. For better or for worse we’re going to need the King of Mezalea.” Lizzie said.

Joel was going through his daily routine of admiring himself in the mirror, killing chickens, and checking his profits. He had just finished polishing his horse heads when he heard frantic splashing from the dock entrance he had built for Lizzie. He went over to the dock to find Lizzie freaking out.

“You alright Lizzie?” Joel asked.

“Yes yes I’m fine. But Jimmy’s in trouble, I️ can feel it.” Lizzie told him quickly.

“He’s gotten himself into trouble again? Jimmy? No you must be mistaken.” Joel said sarcastically.

Lizzie rolled her eyes and splashed him with her tail.

“Hey! I️ just got this outfit. Are you sure he’s actually in trouble or just lost somewhere again. I’m busy collecting more bloody sand.” Joel said.

“Yes. Joel I️ had a faint memory of when Jimmy and I️ were Creatures Of The Sea. He sent out a distress call just now. Just like he did in the memory I️ had.” Lizzie said.

“Hmm. I’ll think about it.” Joel said already coming to a decision that yes, of course he’d help Jimmy.

“What about this: you get to kill every non sea creature we find on the way AND I’ll make you some lamb burgers tonight.” Lizzie suggested.

“Ok, you got me. I can’t pass up an opportunity to kill things so I’ll help. But how the hell do we know where he is? It’s a mystery to me-“ he said and stopped as he realized his mistake. He braced himself for the oncoming puns.

“This calls for a detective. Never fear Sherlockness Monster is here. We must solve the mystery of where the heck Jimmy is and how he got there. This will be our toughest case yet, Dr. Wetson.” Lizzie said. (Edit: Lizzie began to craft a deerstalker hat, like the Sherlock kind, out of seaweed and fastened it on her head).

“Oh no, here we go again. We should probably start by investigating at the Swamp.” Joel suggested.

“Brilliant idea my dear Wetson. I’m starting to learn more about being an axolotl. Here get in this boat and I’ll pull you.” Lizzie said pointing towards a boat. Joel got in the boat and Lizzie immediately started to swim towards the Swamp.

“Lizzie-e-e-e slow do-o-o-own.” Joel said as the boat bounced along on the water. Lizzie ignored him as she continued her beeline towards the Swamp. They arrived at the Swamp incredibly quickly, much to Joel’s stomach’s annoyance.

“Hope the ride wasn’t too bumpy.” Lizzie said.

“I️ think I’m gonna be seasick.” Joel moaned.

“Well at least you look even more like Shrek now. Also you weren’t too seasick to jump out and kill that random chicken we saw on the way here.” Lizzie observed.

“It was looking at me funny. It had it coming. Oh, oh no-“ Joel started but then stopped, seeing that the corruption had gotten creepier and even more concerning, Jimmy’s items scattered on the ground.

“Lizzie I️ think you were right. I️ think Jimmy is in danger.” Joel said with concern. “Lizzie?” He said when she didn’t respond, and noticed she wasn’t there.

“Oh Joel. This poor little cod was stuck in the grasp of one of these little tentacles.” Lizzie said getting into the water to rescue the cod. “LET. GO.” She said angrily as she kicked the tentacle. The tentacle eventually relented and let the cod go. The cod swam happily around Lizzie and made some strange noises. Joel guessed those noises were distressed because Lizzie made a concerning face and looked at Joel. “This cod says that Jimmy was killed and captured by someone and that without his slime he won’t last long in a stressful environment.” Lizzie said nervously. “Who captured him?” Lizzie asked the cod.

“Wait are you seriously talking to a fish? I️ guess crazy runs in your family.” Joel said.

Lizzie shushed him and then shivered as her fears were confirmed. “Just as I️ suspected, Dr. Wetson, it was Xornoth. Sometimes I️ hate it when I’m right.” Lizzie said.

Now back to your regularly scheduled angst (maybe, hopefully). After this quick message from our sponsor (aka I️ really need to take a shower). Unfortunately while in the shower I️ had even more Ideas but I️ can’t use them until later but also hhhhhnnbnnhhhhhswyjkh

Jimmy slowly opened his eyes after what seemed like ages. For a second he didn’t remember where he was and started to panic. Then he remembered he was just being held hostage by his best friend’s demonic brother, not that that was anymore comforting. Jimmy was sure that they were at the very least best friends, he had given Scott a cake when they were establishing their empires.

“Have a nice nap, fish boy?” Xornoth said, his glowing eyes appearing in the darkness to stare at Jimmy as he struggled against the tentacles’ grasp.

“It’s the Codfather actually, not fish boy. And did you know that one one of the fish related to the cod is a Walleye Pollock.” Jimmy said.

“Oh really? I️ heard you got demoted down to CodBoy. You can’t even do your own religion right.” Xornoth said.

“H- How’d you know about that? I️ haven’t told anybody yet.” Jimmy said. No one except for Scott, Jimmy thought to himself.

“Why Jimmy I️ know more about you than you even know about yourself. Not that you know much about anything except slime and Cod.” Xornoth oozed.

“I️ know plenty of things about myself. And I️ know plenty of things about Salmon too, actually. Know thy enemy and all that.” Jimmy insisted.

“Oh really? Then how do I️ know that it’s your fault that Lizzie left the ocean and lost all her memories. She certainly would blame you for that if she knew properly. And of course you also went against my brother and defeated the dragon. I️ really must thank you for that. You’re friends all hate you for that too.” Xornoth said smiling.

“No, everyone knows that that whole thing with the dragon was just a big misunderstanding. I️ already knew Lizzie left the ocean because of me.” Jimmy said.

“And don’t even get me started with how you always lose at those little games you play with your friends in your dreams at night. Dos, Ghost Hunt, Business Stonks. I️ mean you’re friends are actively trying to make you lose.” Xornoth continued

Meanwhile in Rivendell, the Cod in Scott’s Cod Sanctuary were going absolutely mental. Scott instantly knew something wasn’t right. He didn’t need to be able to speak fish to know that Jimmy was in trouble. Ever since Jimmy had told him about his newfound ability to talk to fish, Scott was impressed. Pinpointing the moment he’d fallen for Jimmy though, that was a different thing entirely. The fish continued acting mad and gestured towards the supposedly secret cave where he kept the Xornoth crystal. It made sense that the fish might know where it is since he’d only told Jimmy about it. He rushed towards the cave to find that the ice pillar had been taken over by corruption and the crystal was cracked.

“Well shet.” He said under his breath.

“Why hello brother. Long time no see.” Xornoth said without actually appearing in a physical form.

“Hello Xornoth.” Scott said casually.

“I’m only going to say this once so listen carefully. If you truly care for your precious little fish freak then you’ll do exactly as I️ say. Otherwise I️’ll fry him alive and have a nice cod dinner tonight. Mmmm yummy.” Xornoth said.

Scott’s eyes widened at the information and he immediately got defensive (for good reason). “Jemmy’s not a freak. Don’t you dare touch him I️ swear to Aeor.” Scott started.

“He is a freak his egg was small and damaged just like he is, I just know what you see in him. And what are you gonna do, kill me? We both know the prophecy. Plus if you kill me then you’ll never find out where your precious little cod boy is. He’ll shrivel up all alone thinking his friends don’t care about him. Well that will happen either way. Unless of course, you do exactly what I️ want you to.” Xornoth told Scott.

“I’m not going to help you. Not after what you’ve done to everyone.” Scott answered.

“Oh? Is that so?” Xornoth asked as a holographic projection appeared and showed Jimmy wrapped tightly in tentacles with steam coming off him as his scales fought against the torturous heat of the tentacles. Jimmy looked on the verge of tears (which to be fair he threatened to cry at them daily) as the tentacles played with his ear fins and gills and Xornoth whispered lies in his ears.

Scott could barely stop himself from letting out a high pitched squeal as he watched the projection. “F- Fine what do want. Please just stop hurting him.” Scott said. “We already put him through enough as it is.” He added silently to himself.

“Bring me the Ocean Queen’s head. You must freeze her with your ice powers and bring her head here before Midnight or else I’ll enjoy a nice cod sandwich although I doubt he’d taste any good.” Xornoth demanded.

Scott knew he’d do anything to protect Jimmy. He might even go along with Xornoth’s play if only to keep Jimmy alive just a little bit longer. “Fine I’ll do it.” He said finally as he whistled for his noble stag steed.

“Perfect.” Xornoth said smiling.

Scott rode his steed as fast as they could go. He rode them across the rivers and lakes toward the Swamp freezing the water as his steed galloped across it. In his wake he left a trail of frozen tears.

Lizzie and Joel were talking to the Cod that Lizzie had rescued from the tentacles grasp.

“I️ mean at least the Demon Boob didn’t come back. I️ may be an amphibian but I️ sure know a Demon Boob when I️ see one.” Lizzie said.

“Actually that was a giant eyeball although Demon Boob is arguably a lot funnier I️ gotta admit.” Scott said arriving on his stag.

Joel was immediately suspicious and not just because he liked causing drama.

“Oh thank the oceans you’re here Scott. Jimmy’s been captured by Xornoth.” Lizzie said frantically.

“What do we need him for.” Joel asked tooling his eyes.

“Well first of all he’s one of Jimmy’s Allie’s and second of all, ya know, they’re in love and all that.” Lizzie answered.

“Wot no we’re not, wot are you talking about.” Scott said still not completely aware that he was in love with Jimmy.

“Lizzie something isn’t right. Something’s off about Scott.” Joel whispered to Lizzie.

Scott’s eyes were glazed over in an icy layer making him looking somewhat crazy.

“He’s right Lizzie. Something isn’t right. I’m sorry but I️ have to do this. It’s the only way he’ll let Jimmy go.” Scott said as he dismounted from his stag and walked up to Lizzie, a razor sharp icicle appearing in his hands.

“It’s ok Scott. I️ understand, I’d do anything to protect my baby brother. I️ will peaceably give you my head.” Lizzie said as Scott lifted the icicle towards Lizzie.

Joel cleared his throat. “Ahem. What the bloody hell do you think you’re doing, Scott?” He asked.

“Saving Jimmy.” Scott and Lizzie both answered at the same time.

“I️ promise I’ll make this as quick and painless as possible.” Scott said as he plunged the icicle towards Lizzie. Right before the icicle made contact with Lizzie, instead of impaling her it dissipated and ice spread across her body leaving only her head unfrozen. Then in a flash of bright white light Lizzie had disappeared leaving only Lizzie’s head and her items scattered across the ground.

At first Joel was too shocked to do anything. Then he regained his composure, let out a strange growl and lunged at Scott.

Lizzie woke up with a start and sat up gasping for air. She at first didn’t know where she was although she knew exactly what had happened, it was for the greater good after all. She then realized she was in one of Jimmy’s lounge chairs that he had by the Swamp’s beach. She remembered that she and Joel had, mostly because of Joel’s insistence, stopped to jump on the lounge chair beds like little kids. That must’ve been why she woke up there. It was a good thing too, because she realized that Joel, being the madman that he was, was in the process of beating Scott up with a Mazalean cactus. Lizzie got up and went over to Scott and Joel.

“By the Sea Spirits, Joel. What the heck are you doing to poor Scott?” Lizzie asked in concern. Scott despite currently being beaten up with a cactus, looked extremely relieved as soon as he saw Lizzie.

“What do you bloody think I’m doing? I’m attacking Scott with a Mazalean cactus because he just killed you. And he’s making it so easy he’s not even fighting back lol.” Joel answered as if what he was doing was perfectly logical.

“That’s because I completely deserve to be attacked with your cactus, Joel. I️ didn’t want to kill Lizzy but I needed her head so that Xornoth would stop hurting Jimmy. Thank goodness you’re ok Lizzie. I️ was so afraid that Xornoth might do something to keep you from waking up after I️ killed you.” Scott said.

“I’m fine, thank you. Do you have the head?” Lizzie said.

“Yes. Although I️ doubt Xornoth really needed it for anything. He probably just wanted to try drive us apart as friends.” Scott said.

-Earlier or Meanwhile or Something-

Jimmy was still stuck in the grasps of the tentacles which were getting progressively hotter. Suddenly he felt an icy chill run down his spine, which normally would have been welcoming in these hot conditions except for the fact that he had a feeling that it was related to Lizzie and that it wasn’t a good sign.

“Your so called friends can’t even get along with each other much less you. That elf you’ve got a crush on? He just killed your sister.” Xornoth said and presented a holographic recording of Scott killing Lizzie seemingly unprovoked while Joel watched with shock and horror on his face.

“This is some sort of trick. It’s got to be. My friends wouldn’t do that to each other.” Jimmy insisted.

“Really? Then explain this.” Xornoth said, tossing Lizzie’s head at Jimmy. The head bonked Jimmy in the face since couldn’t do much to catch it since he was tied down by the tentacles.

“Oops hahaha sorry.” Xornoth said insincerely.

Jimmy looked at the head which was apparently a lot harder than he had expected it to be when it hit him in the face. The head was a faded grey color instead of the usual indigo hue of Lizzie’s skin and her pink hair. Like coral that had been away from the water for too long.

“Believe me now?” Xornoth asked.

“I’m sure there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for this. Plus now I’ll have a new head to add to my collection when I️ get home.” Jimmy said. “IF I️ get home.” He added to himself.

“You really think your friends want to see you? Plus you wouldn’t want them to see you like this would you? You’re at your lowest right now and your friends will think you’re even weaker than they already do.” Xornoth said.

“Even if they did think I️ was weak there isn’t much I️ could do to change their minds.” He said, knowing full well that at least a few of the other Empires probably thought he was weak.

“I️ know you don’t trust me but I️ know you can be so much stronger. The strongest empire in the lands I️ dare say. You can flood the lands, make the whole area your mucky wet swamplands.” Xornoth said.

“What do you mean I️ have the power to flood the lands and make them all your own.” Jimmy said.

“Oh Jimmy, you may have been the small damaged egg but you were once a creature of the sea with untold powers. You could easily defeat them all. I️ mean why else do you think that elf boy of my brother pretends to like you so much? And don’t say some mopey crap like because he loves me I️ already told you he doesn’t. He’s using you, Jim.” Xornoth said.

“Hold on could you slow down. My brain can only process so many things at once. ADHD’ll do that to you sometimes.” Jimmy said trying to process all the Crap he had just learned. How much of what Xornoth was saying was true. Did Jimmy really have untold powers of the sea? And was Scott really just using him?

Jimmy opened his eyes again and had never been more happy to see the sun and the trees and the sky. For the past few days in that dark cave he had been so scared that if he closed his eyes he’d never open them again. He didn’t even care where he was as long as he was somewhat safe. Then he closed his eyes again and lay there breathing in the nice fresh air that only smelled a little bit demony. There were only a few remotely safe places that also happened to smell demony and those were Sausage’s and fWhip’s places since it matched their aesthetics. He trusted them, or at least he would have if he hadn’t just spent what felt like a lot of days being stuck in a cramped, dark, fish unfriendly, cave with Xornoth. “I️ bet they think I’m weak too. I’ll show them. I’ll show them all.” He thought to himself. He tried to get up but then finally realized his entire body ached and he really did feel Dry. He decided it wasn’t worth it to do anything right now even if it made him look weak.

((I️ don’t actually know much about Sausage or fWhip other than their edgy aesthetics and they’re part of Jimmy’s accidental posse)).

Meanwhile at Sausage’s place, Sausage and fWhip were having a meeting. A meeting about what exactly, even they weren’t sure. It was all a good time until Sausage stopped suddenly.

“I️ think Xornoth is nearby or something. I️ can feel it.” Sausage said.

“How do you know?” fWhip asked.

“I’ve got Xornoth detectors all over the Mythlands. That guy scares me, fWhip.” Sausage said as he went to the window of his Only Dark For The Aesthetic Tower.

“Oh my gosh fWhip come here doesn’t that look like Jimmy down there laying in my wheat field.” Sausage said.

“He looks like he’s taking a nap. Hey you wanna go draw on his face while he’s sleeping.” FWhip suggested.

“Hell yeah I️ do let’s go.” Sausage answered as he and fWhip headed down the stairs to go draw on Jimmy and laughing. They stopped laughing when they got to where Jimmy was passed out and curled up in a ball in and shaking slightly in the wheat field.

“Oh no. Look at poor Jimmy he looks like he’s been sunburnt but like evilly. You think he’s dead?” Sausage asked poking Jimmy with a stick he had found. When Jimmy didn’t move fWhip chimed in. “I’m not sure but if he is dead then I️ think we should get some of his stuff. Ya know since he died in your wheat field and messed up your crops.” fWhip suggested.

“fWhip this isn’t a sunburn and he’s not dead. But he will be if we don’t help him. I️ think this was Xornoth. I️- I️ know his work very well and this looks like something he’d do.” Sausage said.

“You two think you can rob me just because you think I’m weak huh?” Jimmy finally said.

“AAAAH zombie.” Sausage and fWhip both screamed and one jumped into the other ones arms, scared upon seeing Jimmy’s “dead body” talking.

“AAAAH where? I️ don’t have my stuff on me.” Jimmy said and tried to move. “OW. That hurts like a buttcheek on a stick.” Jimmy said as he felt a burning sensation shoot through his body when he tried to move.

Sausage got a bucket of water and poured it on Jimmy. Jimmy slowly started to become less shriveled looking and stopped shaking. “You two think I’m weak don’t you. You all do, even Scott.” Jimmy said.

“What the hell did Xornoth do to you Jimmy. We don’t think you’re weak, especially Scott.” Sausage said in concern.

“For starters he said you still secretly worked for him and you were only pretending to try to be my friend out of pity and to help him.” Jimmy said.

“He was telling the truth about that first part.” Sausage said as fWhip gave him a look of betrayal. “But I️ promise I️ was doing it to protect everyone. He said if I️ didn’t go along with what he said then he’d kill and torture all of you. He he also said that if I️ told anyone he’d come for me. He’ll torture me again but I️ had to get that off my chest. As for that second part Xornoth was being a lying liar face. I’m you’re friend now because you’re a nice funny guy and because I️ was mean to you in the past.”

fWhip looked at Sausage and Jimmy in confusion, still processing what had just happened. “Jimmy you need a doctor, a healer, someone who can help you.” fWhip insisted.

“Did you see anything about Scott killing Lizzie using magic?” Jimmy asked nervously.

“I️ haven’t really been paying attention that much so I️ don’t know. Jimmy listen to me, I️ know from experience that Xornoth is really good at hurting ppl and messing with their heads. Don’t listen to him.” Sausage started.

“Do you guys wanna flood the world with me. We could be the most powerful empire. You and everyone else would never think I’m weak again.” Jimmy said starting to be able to move again thanks to the water that Sausage had poured on him.

“You know what, I’ve been kinda bored so let’s do that Jimmy let’s flood the world while I️ still can.” Sausage said.

Jimmy remembered everything Xornoth had said to him in that cave and he hated it. He had a feeling that he had ended up in Sausage’s wheat field. Maybe he really had been so desperate to make friends that he had even been willing to become friends with Sausage.

“Jimmy this is my fault. I️ should’ve known he wouldn’t keep up his end of the bargain. I️ know from experience we should call Lizzie or Scott to help you.” Sausage said.

“Sausage bro, I️ thought I’d never see things again it was so dark in there.” Jimmy said looking at Sausage deciding to trust him for now.

“He said you guys hated me for what I️ did even though I️ was brainwashed. I️ knew even if that were true I️ still wanted to protect all of you from getting hurt by him since I️ knew what it was like.” Sausage told Jimmy.

fWhip stood there kinda awkwardly feeling like a third wheel but decided he had something important to say. “Jimmy I️ know you don’t trust anyone right now but I️ promise we won’t think you’re week if you need help. You look like you have a terrible sunburn.” fWhip said to Jimmy. fWhip then proceeded to bring out some slime from his bag and Sausage did so as well.

The look on Jimmy’s face as he instinctively lunged towards the slime balls was like that of a hungry animal finally seeing food. His eyes were crazed as he grabbed the slime and started slathering on himself like a lotion. Unlike a lotion though, he also started eating it because he was hungry and slime was actually edible for him.

“Dude when was the last time you ate. I’ve got some food that I️ use for my uhhh ya know my fish.” fWhip said a little awkwardly since he wanted Jimmy to eat something but knew he probably wouldn’t eat the food if he thought it was for Salmon.

“I’m not sure. It’s ok sometimes I️ get distracted forget to eat for a while. Scott or Lizzie usually has to remind me to eat haha.” Jimmy said casually.

“That is slightly concerning but also completely understandable.” Sausage responded.

“I’m not sure which things Xornoth told me we’re true and which ones weren’t. He said I️ had untold powers of the sea, that’d be cool. But there were so many things he told me in there that I️ hope are lies.” Jimmy said.

“Well you definitely need medical or magical attention. Or at the very least a nap.” fWhip suggested.

“I’m scared that if I️ go to sleep he’ll haunt my dreams. Not that I’m scared or anything. I️ don’t need everyone to coddle the poor little small damaged egg. I️ probably just need some more waterrrr.” Then everything went dark as Jimmy fell right into Sausage’s and fWhip’s arms.

“Aww I️ think he wants us to all do a group hug.” Sausage said, patting Jimmy on the back.

“Uh Sausage I️ think just passed out in our arms.” fWhip informed him.

“I️ think now would be a good time to call Lizzie and also Scott. I️ doubt that what Xornoth said was true, about Scott using Jimmy for whatever reason. Probably just more bull crap he made up.” Sausage said.

“Do you have any magic that could keep Xornoth out of Jimmy’s dreams.” fWhip said. “Wait don’t you have some magic that could help Jimmy. Is there some reason you didn’t use it earlier. And are you the reason why Jimmy ended up here.” fWhip added suspiciously, finally processing what Sausage had told them earlier.

“I’ve never been the heal-y kind of sorcerer alright. I’m more of the bring them back after they’ve already died kinda guy ya know. But I️ definitely have a few things that can help keep Xornoth out of Jimmy’s dreams. And I’m afraid you’re right fWhip I️ think Xornoth spat Jimmy out here for a reason. I️ think he thinks he can get me to help him.” Sausage said.

“Well he’s hopefully not dead so your necromancy stuff isn’t going to work. What do we need to do to keep Xornoth out of his dreams. Also I’ve already sent some Salmon to go get Lizzie and Scott so they should be here soon.” fWhip said.

“Well I️ know how to summon this one guy, he looks kinda like an elephant to be honest. But he can eat nightmares so that should ensure Jimmy has a good night’s sleep.” Sausage said. Sausage went to go summon the elephant guy while fWhip stayed and kept an eye on Jimmy. He knew that if Jimmy woke up he’d probably try to leave because he didn’t want to show weakness or whatever.

After a while of staring at the wheat fWhip started to wonder what was taking a long time.

“How freaking long does it take for Sausage to summon an elephant guy?” fWhip asked himself.

Sausage had an unfortunately good reason for taking so long. Having impromptu meeting with your demonic ex-boss tends to do that to you.

“You said you wouldn’t hurt my friends but you lied. Wow what a surprise.” Sausage said, starting to get really annoyed that he couldn’t just go one day without Xornoth bothering him about something.

“Is Jimmy really your friend though or is he just friends with you to smooth over past drama?” Xornoth asked Sausage.

“I’ve learned your tricks Xornoth and I️ won’t fall for them. Whether that’s true or not he’s still my friend. All the empires are. Except the ones I️ don’t like but only I️ can go after them since they’re MY frenemies.” Sausage said, unwilling to let Xornoth mess with his head again.

“Mmmm. Maybe so but there are a few promises that I️ keep and one of them is that if you ruined my plans I’d make you suffer.” Xornoth said, as the tentacles came for Sausage.

“Uh excuse me, is this the elephant summoning room?” fWhip asked as he came into the room. “Oh hey Xornoth.” He added casually, then did a double take as he realized that Xornoth was there trying to frick with Sausage.

“fWhip why aren’t you with Jimmy. You weren’t supposed be a part of this.” Sausage said as the tentacles ensnared him.

“I’ll just take you with me too. You really should’ve taken my over all those months ago.” Xornoth said ensnaring fWhip with the tentacles as well and smiling evilly.

“Who the bloody hell is Xornoth? You keep talking about him like he’s real and I’ve just been going along with it.” Joel asked again for what felt like millionth time on their trip to Mythland. For some reason it felt a lot longer than it should given that it was right next door.

“How do you not know who Xornoth is? He haunted the server, created the corruption and did a bunch of other evil things. He’s also Scott’s brother.” Lizzie said.

“Are we there yettt?” Joel asked for what also felt like the millionth time.

“No. We’re not there yet. Xornoth must be creating space-time warps to make it take longer for us to get there.” Scott answered.

“Well then un-space-time warp it. Also that demon isn’t even real. Like with all my problems I️ just ignore him. Not that he’s my problem anyway.” Joel said.

“It’s not that simple Joel. I️ can try to use some elven magic to counteract the space-time warps but that’s about it. Xornoth is more powerful and angry than ever.” Scott said.

“I️ just hope Jimmy’s alright.” Lizzie said worriedly.

“He’ll be fine stop worrying, you two. On second thought it’s Jimmy so he’s probably went and gotten himself killed again. Probably another encounter with a dolphin gone awry.” Joel said.

“Joel! Don’t say that. I️ can feel it in my bones that Jimmy needs our help.” Lizzie said splashing him with water.

“He doesn’t need your help. After all you’re the reason he is the way he is. The small broken egg.” Said a particularly angry looking cloud.

“What are you talking about. I️ protected his egg and then once it hatched I️ protected him.” Lizzie said now unsure if even that was true.

“Why, don’t you know the classic story of Kronos and his children?” The cloud asked.

“He was the the father of some of the first Olympic gods. He feared that one day they would take his throne. So his solution was to eat them. How is that relevant though?” Scott said.

“Very surprisingly good brother-“ Xornoth started but was cut off by Joel.

“Hold on so not only is this so-called demon that supposedly exists is your brother but also so is this cloud?” Joel asked mostly just to be annoying.

“Ahem. It’s relevant because Lizzie knew that Jimmy would be mare powerful than her so in a primal rage she damaged his egg. What nobody seems to realize is that Jimmy is much more powerful than everyone thinks he is.” The cloud said ominously because it was a very ominous cloud.

“Actually, ‘demon’ if you’re even real, the folktale book says that the egg was damaged before Lizzie even hatched. She had nothing to do with it.” Joel said.

“Well that story is just folktale. You have no idea if it’s real or not.” The cloud said.

“Well demon clouds are also folklore so there’s no way we know you actually exist.” Joel said.

Later Jimmy might go absolutely feral thinking that the other empires think he’s weak because Xornoth messed with his head. Let’s just say I️ just slapped myself in the feels.

#tag eventually

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