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I’m dreaming dreams, and the dreams I dream like pearls in the darkness gleam. Mori Tower, Roppongi Hills, Tokyo, 2024 Aleksandra Alba IG: tanzdreamer [Recreating this moment from 2019 at Mori Tower. It’s amazing to see how much has changed and how some things remain timeless. Grateful for the journey and the chance to revisit such an iconic spot.]

Writer’s Note:

Subject: Expansion and Constraint

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There’s a very specific shift that happens while building a story.

At first, everything expands.

You explore ideas.

You test philosophical tensions.

You identify the major knots;

the turning points, the ideological core, the emotional weight.

This is creation through expansion.

Nothing is fixed yet.

You can redesign the system, adjust motivations, reshape the ending and nothing collapses. The world is elastic.

It feels powerful.

Because every idea opens ten more.

But then something changes.

You start writing actual scenes.

And suddenly the story stops being possibility...

and starts being structure.

Now it’s no longer:

“What if this happened?”

It’s:

“If this happens, then that must also be true.”

This is creation through constraint.

Constraint is harder.

Because now you must:

Choose one mechanism

Close other possibilities

Accept that this is canon

And your brain resists committing.

Not because you’re stuck.

Not because the idea is weak.

But because once something becomes structural, it creates consequences.

And consequences reveal dependency chains.

You realize:

If the system works this way,

then identity must function like this.

If identity functions like this,

then invalidation has these limits.

If invalidation has these limits,

then the ending must account for them.

If the ending accounts for them,

then the beginning needs to change.

Phase 2 reveals how interconnected everything is.

Story influences character.

Character influences setting.

Setting reshapes plot.

Plot exposes weaknesses in the system.

The system alters tone.

And suddenly it feels like there are a thousand missing pieces.

You can’t write the next scene because you don’t fully understand the character.

You can’t define the character because you don’t fully understand the structure.

You can’t define the structure because you haven’t written far enough yet.

It becomes circular.

And that circular process can feel frustrating.

But it isn’t failure.

It’s refinement.

In Phase 1, you design the chessboard.

In Phase 2, you make the first irreversible move.

And once you move, the board answers back.

The story becomes heavier.

More complicated.

More demanding.

But it also gains form.

Weight.

Drive.

Constraint forces clarity.

And clarity creates momentum.

That’s why it’s important to start anyway.

Not with the expectation that the first version will remain untouched.

Not with the pressure that every scene must be final.

But with the understanding that sketches are meant to be revisited.

Characters evolve.

Settings adjust.

Mechanisms get refined.

You don’t wait until you know everything.

You begin; so the structure can reveal itself.

You write; so the gaps become visible.

You return; and adjust.

Again and again.

Until eventually, nothing fundamentally new appears.

Not because imagination ran out;

but because the architecture stabilized.

That shift isn’t weakness.

It’s the moment the story stops being abstract

and starts becoming real.

-memoryinvalid