shiro x athena domestic!headcanons
Shiro is a sucker for soap opera and trashy day time reality shows
he loves Keeping up with The Kardashians and The Bachalorette
makes it a point to drag her to the couch when there’s a special episode as they sip wine and groan at ‘that Bachalorette who can’t get her priorities right’.
whenever the other Paladins come over to their house for a movie night and they see recorded episodes of The Final Rose, they nonchalantly assume it’s Athena
she doesn’t rebuke them bc she knows he has a reputation and takes the fall for him
Shiro loves her more for it
they often feel lazy at the end of the week and would get Chinese or pizza
Shiro finds it sacrilegious that she loves her pizza with no toppings
“it’s jUST DOUGH AND TOMATO SAUCE THIE.”
they fight for the custody of their shared portable speaker
“you had cubey yesterday!”
“early bird gets the worm, Nakamura. Life’s hard.”
“ugh, piss off Shirogane.”
Shiro trains her when he has a spare minute and she teaches him yoga to relax
just imagine Shiro in a tank top trying to contort his body like her and Athena’s dying at his expressions
“I think my--hnnm-- body hates me.”
she laughs and he retaliates during training by pushing her with tough love
“if you want to be as good as me, you need to whip your ass in shape!”
“you’re not even that good!” she’ll yell through laps
Shiro: *chasing after her* “say that to my face!”
Athena: *dutifully speeds up with a comical grimace on her face*
it was an (elaborate) honeymoon gift from Allura and they use it whenever they can
she loves putting bath bombs in the water and Shiro would love it too, if the glitter would stop clinging to his chest
“sparkly tits Shirogane.”
“shut your quiznak, Nakamura.”
to rile her up, Shiro calls her ‘my dude’ or ‘bruhhh’
there was once after they had sex, he turned over with a satisfied sigh and said, “thanks bruh,” and he slept on the couch for three days
Athena playfully retaliates by calling him ‘friend.’
“this is my friend, Shiro.”
“babe...we’ve been married for five years.”
“fine. he’s my best friend.”
he buys her flowers for the start of every month
it’s just to see her smile and Athena treasures every bouquet
Shiro, surprisingly, has a green thumb and grows succulents and herbs in their kitchen
they have terrariums everywhere
everyone assumes it’s Athena’s touch, but she can’t differentiate between a cactus or succulent
her favorite is a Jade Plant that she calls ‘Gary’
Shiro secretly names it ‘Damaris’ after her middle name bc the shiny surface reminds him of her hair
speaking of middle names, Athena knows she is in trouble when he calls her by her full name
he knows she’s angry when her usually affectionate ‘Kashi’ is replaced by his full name
grocery shopping is a riot for the both of them
Athena often leaves him groaning with her puns
“hey babe, I find you egg-cellent.”
Shiro: “Go egg-splode yourself.”
“Now, now. There’s no need to be testy. Get it? Test-ty--eggs look like testicles--wait, Shiro, where are you going?”
when the aisles are empty, he loves pushing her in the shopping cart and smiling when she squeals in laughter
they nearly got blacklisted from Trader Joes once for nearly running into a mountain of skim milk
there was one time Shiro was really stressed with his job at the garrison and he came back to a kid pool in the backyard
she filled it with warm water and managed to engineer a bubble generator so they had their own jacuzzi
she accidentally punctured it with her quintessence powers when he tickled her too hard and they sat in a slowly deflating pool laughing their stomachs off
she pouted, but he made it up to her by taking her to a couple spa the next week
they’re still touchy-feely after all these years
when they’re watching Netflix, he has to have an arm around her. when they walk around in malls, their hands are twined and when they go out for a meal, their knees often touch
she doesn’t mind, bc she loves the jealous looks women (and men)
throw her when they see her hanging onto his arm
he likes how she’s still possessive and when someone chats him up, she makes sure to walk over to him and wrap an arm around his waist, saying in her sweetest voice, “hey my honey, husband, you beautiful thing. can you help me choose a blender?”
the amount of times she’s used the blender excuse has him secretly howling with laughter (especially if it’s the same person who has hit on him)
Shiro has a habit of singing annoying commercial jingles that get stuck in her head for hours
“Dr. Pepper, the perfect taste for meeee~”
“Shiro, I love you, but that song has been stuck in my head since yesterday. Please. Stop.”
“see you in divorce court, Shirogane.”
Shiro, under his breath: “the perfect taste for meee~”
Athena is a night owl (heh) and he’s an early riser. they tend to get on each other’s nerves
but they’ve found a way to circumvent their own habits so as not to annoy one another
he often finds her fast asleep in her lab and would draw a spare blanket around her
Athena always remembers to boil water the night before so he can have hot water for his morning coffee
once he woke her up for an early jog and she was Not Pleased™
cursed the whole time she was running
Shiro found her PG cursing to be funny and recorded her puffing innocent curses the whole way
speaking of recording, Shiro loves taking photos of her when she least expects it
Athena has been conditioned after all these years to keep her “good angle” towards him in case he whips out his phone
it’s all heartwarming photos of her doing everyday things like cooking, cleaning or laughing at his jokes
he has a whole album on his phone dedicated to her laughing expression
when she gets pregnant, he documents every single day of their child’s development until birth
his favorite video is of her tearing up a gun training session at their local firearms class which he captioned as ‘First Day of Pregnancy <3′
he has tons of vids of her training or throwing knives as ‘My Badass Baby Hard at Work!!11!!)
Shiro is actually really camera shy and it took him a lot of convincing to appear on her Instagram feed
she promised not to tag him and forgot about her promise
Shiro got ten DM’s that day from people asking if he was single
“see Thie?!! this is why I don’t want to unleash the power of my jawline to the world!”
she’s still salty about it
they have so many nicknames for each other
her favorite for him is ‘Romeo’ or ‘Space Boy’ if she’s feeling nostalgic
he calls her ‘Juliet’ sometimes when he wants to tease her. if he wants to get her blushing hard, all he has to do is whisper ‘my beautiful star.’
she normally punches his arm when he says that, but sometimes she smiles, trying to hide her red cheeks
he keeps it simple, and when he says ‘Thie’ in his softest tone, she will turn putty
Shiro will do anything to escape laundry day
once he was bored and horny at work and asked her to tell him something dirty
Athena surprised him by calling and when he answered, she made sure to put on her best seductive voice.
“you wanna know something dirty, huh?” she purrs. Shiro swallows, nodding before remembering she can’t see him.
“fuck yes, babe. tell me what you’ve done, baby girl.”
she moans, and he can plainly hear rustling of sheets in the background. “i’m...i’m not wearing any panties.”
he’s almost panting, painfully hard, trying to regulate his breathing in the quiet office. “why aren’t you wearing any?”
“because,” she snaps, and he’s confused. “you never fucking put them in the wash.”
she hangs up and Shiro dies for a second time that day
of course, she apologized when he came back, and he duly punished her ;)
bc of that day, he makes sure to do the laundry now, not wanting a repeat of his humiliation
Athena has a penchant for singing sad love songs in the shower (like Sam Smith’s ‘Too Good at Goodbyes’)
Shiro once asked her playfully if the man of her dreams was dead and she placed her hand on his chest, a sorrowful expression on her face as she whispered: “yes, he’s dead. in here.”
he was high-key offended and didn’t talk to her for 30 minutes
when he has a huge test coming up for his cadets, he’s drawn and quiet, concentrating on his syllabus
she helps by making him cups of tea and leaving a plate of food beside him
sometimes, he gets too stressed, and she insists he takes a break and they make food in the kitchen to de-stress
watching her hum and flip pancakes gets him to relax bc it’s familiar, and it’s Athena
when she has a project evaluation for a new space mission, he makes sure to leave the fluffiest blanket for her at her side of the bed
sometimes he checks up on her and if she’s groaning, he’ll ask if he can massage her shoulders
she almost always agrees. plus, he has magic fingers and it gets her to relax
she loves him even more for it and thanks whatever deity up there that he’s hers.
read safe places on a03 // ff.net
