#tempest barlow

[incorrectkaye]

tempest: eikko, are you getting enough sleep?

eikko: sometimes when i sneeze, my eyes close.

[incorrectval]

The Rebels as quotes from The Office

Vik: who let this lemon head into the room? *looking at the capitol* you are a waste of life and should give up.

Kora: i have flaws. what are they? well i sing in the shower, sometimes i spend too much time volunteering. occasionally i kill an arena full of kids. sue me.

Kaiden: i tried to talk to cain and be his friend, but that’s like trying to be friends with an evil snail.

Azure: i want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

Ronnie: i am beyoncé, always.

Eikko: this day is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

Cassian: i knew exactly what to do, but in a much more real sense, i had no idea what to do.

Terra: identity theft is not a joke! millions of families suffer every year!

Cain: azure, you ignorant slut!

Amira: i’m running away from my responsibilities and it feels so good.

Tempest: it takes an advanced sense of humour. i don’t expect everybody to understand.

Roman: i’m not superstitious, i’m just stitious.

Metias: sometimes i’ll start a sentence and i don’t even know where it’s going. i just hope i find it along the way.

Ziggy: *takes some asprin* I don’t have a headache, i’m just preparing.

Xander: when someone smiles at me, all i see is a chimpanzee begging for its life.

[incorrectcasper-blog]

The Rebels As Creed Quotes

Kora: just pretend like we’re talking until the cops leave.

Cassian: if i can’t scuba, then what’s this all been about?

Vik: cool beans, man. i live by the quarry. we should hang out and throw things down there.

Metias: not bad for a day in the life of a dog food company.

Eikko: i’ve been involved in a number of cults. both as a leader and a follower.

Ronnie: you should see how many supplies i’ve taken from this place. honestly, i love stealing.

Amira: the taliban is the worst... great heroin though.

Tempest: what’s a text?

Kaiden: au natural, baby. that’s how i like em. swing low, sweet chariots.

Cain: the only difference between me and a homeless man is this job.

Azure: i made love to many, many women, often in the outdoors in the mud and rain. it’s possible a man may have slipped in there. there’s no way of knowing.

[incorrectkat]

tempest: alright, what’s the first thing about first aid we should teach the new recruits?

veronica: natural selection and every man for themselves?

tempest: you don’t get to teach the new recruits.

[incorrectkaye]

eikko: look guys, i need help.

azure: love help?

ronnie: wardrobe help?

metias: financial help?

cain: gaming help?

tempest: emotional help?

vik: help moving a body?

*everybody looks at vik*

vik: what?

[incorrectcasper-blog]

The Rebels As Louis CK Quotes

Metias: here’s how my brain works: it’s stupidity, followed by self-loathing, and then further analysis.

Eikko: but maybe... if touching a nut kills you, you’re supposed to die.

Kora: i get really upset when people say nice things to me.

Cassian: look, i ate too much and masturbated too recently.

Kaiden: why the fuck would anything nice EVER happen? are you stupid?

Cain: i’m a white man. you can’t even hurt my feelings.

Azure: i do wanna fuck you but you won’t fuck me so fuck you anyway.

Amira: fuck her, seriously. i hope she’s dead. i hope she died today weirdly and horribly.

Ronnie: when people are boring i want to kill them.

Vik: getting up is a whole thing. first i have to decide, do i really wanna be alive anymore?

Tempest: when women go wild, they kill men and drown their kids in a tub.

Ziggy: i have a lot of beliefs and i live by none of them.

[incorrectval]

Vik: imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughput your lifetime.

Cassian: it would be nice to get my sense of purpose back.

Kora: my childhood innocence! thank you for finding this.

Metias: my will to live! i haven’t seen this in 18 years.

Cain: i knew i lost that potential somewhere!

Azure: mental stability, my old friend!

Kaiden: man, it’s been a while since i last saw my morals...

Tempest: oh how good it is to see my self esteem come back to me!

Amira: oh i thought i could find a hand somewhere!

Eikko: my long lost happiness! long time no see!

Ziggy: do you think i’ll find my heart and soul in there?

Terra: motivation, we meet again.

Ronnie: i really never thought i’d see my dignity again!

Vik:

Vik, choking back tears: please lighten up.

[incorrectkaye]

eikko: *walking around still disappointed six hours after visiting an aquarium*

tempest: what did you think a tiger shark was, eikko?