Tonhon doesn’t know he’s gay because he’s defined the very concept of gay as ‘other’. Gay to Tonhon means ‘not me’. It means ‘not my friends’. It means ‘someone I don’t know and don’t like’.
I mean, this is not a man who engages in self-reflection or introspection or thinks deeply about anything. He’s following his father’s example because, let’s be honest, he’s never had a reason not to in his mind.
Tonhon doesn’t think about how feels about Chon because it would never occur to him to think about it! He doesn’t think about being gay or wanting to touch him because why would he think about that?
It’s also why he overlooks everything about Ai and Ni. Because they’re not Other. They’re his friends and thus they’re not gay. Obviously. He’s so dense because of all that internalized homophobia which has resulted in his othering all gay people as... well, ‘not his friends/himself/people he likes’.
My prediction is that Chon gets outed in the scene from the preview where he kisses a sleeping Ton. Ton flips and Ai and Ni end up outting themselves (might just be Ni outting them with Ai getting upset, possibly) and that’s going to set off an entire lifetime of self-reflection for Ton.
... I can’t wait.





