#theogeny

[trix-the-artemis]

Athena - hey umm dad ... I think I'm trans...

Zeus - *heavy fearful sweating*...

Athena - I want to go by it/its pronouns now.

Zeus - *revealed* oh thank the Fates!

[bobauthorman]

Coincidence?

Why Are We Here: Tucker wants to know what the Reds are saying.

Theogeny: Sarge doesn’t know what Lopez is saying.

[thebrandondowning]

HESIOD (2023), 9 ½" x 10 ½"

[greek-meme-thology]

I've come to make an announcement: Prometheus is a bitch-ass motherfucker. He stole my fucking fire. That's right, he took his Titan-fuckin' quilly fennel stalk out and he stuck it in my fucking fire, and he said his stalk was THIS BIG, and I said, "That's disgusting!" So I'm putting a callout passage in Hesiod's Theogeny: Prometheus, you've got a small liver. It's the size of this pomegranate except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my gift to humanity looks like. PFBPFT! That's right baby, all curves, no dick, no testes-- look at that, she looks like two domes and a clam. He stole my fire, so guess what? Pandora's gonna fuck the EARTH. That's right, this is what you get: MY SUPER LASER PLAGUES!! Except we're not just gonna plague the Earth. I'm gonna go higher; I'm feeding Prometheus's liver TO A BIRD! How do you like that, Odysseus? I FED HIS LIVER TO A BIRD, YOU IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours before the liver drrrrroplllllllets hit the fucking Earth! Now get outta my fucking sight, before I plague you too!

[pieandhotdogs]

The world began with the spontaneous generation of four beings: first arose Khaos (Chasm); then came Gaia (Earth), "the ever-sure foundation of all"; and "dim" Tartaros, in the depths of the Earth; and Eros (Desire) "fairest among the deathless gods". From the Chasm came Erebos (Darkness) and Nyx (Night). And Nyx "from union in love" with Erebos produced Aether (Brightness) and Hemera (Day). From Gaia came Ouranos (Sky), the Ourea (Mountains), and Pontos (Sea).

From Gaia’s union with Ouranos, she birthed the twelve Titans: Okeanos, Koios, Krios, Hyperion, Iapetos, Theia, Rhea, Themis, Mnemosyne, Phoebe, Tethys, and Kronos. The Titans each represent qualities of their divine parents, the male Titans being gods of the sky and time, the female Titannes being goddesses of earth and prophecy. Gaia also produced the three Cyclopes, as well as the three Hekatonkheires (“The Hundred-Handed”).

Ouranos, fearing that one of his children would betray him, hid his brood within the body of Gaia, causing her great pain and discomfort. Gaia gave an adamantine sickle to her youngest son, Kronos who, with the aid of his brothers, restrained and castrated the Sky as he bent to mate with the Earth. Ouranos’s blood fell onto the Earth, and the Erinyes (Furies), Giants, and Melial (Ash nymphs) sprang from that union. Where Ouranos’s genitals fell into the sea, foam developed and Aphrodite was borne from the foam.

[0utpost-alpha]

Red vs Blue S17:E12 - Theogeny Thoughts

FIRST MEMBER SPOILERS BELOW

So we’re starting off with Grif on the obstacle course from Hell.

Grif wanting his initials on the scoreboard to be ASS is beautiful.

Big brother Grif to the rescue!

Oh shit, are they pulling a Bruce Banner/Hulk with Doc and O’Malley

Wash loading a bullet for each of his fallen friends 😭

BAMF DOC!

Jesus fuck Kai what did you do

Oh no Kai baby

The fuck Grif what’s your damage!?

Oh YAY real Grif to the rescue!

HE WASN’T DRAFTED! GRIF WASN’T DRAFTED! HE FUCKING ENLISTED TO RUN AWAY FROM A SHITTY HOME LIFE! WE FINALLY HAVE THE REAL FACTS GUYS!

What an amazing Grif Sibling moment

Sarge: “Smoke em if you got em, Sarge” hey how, no need for that Genkins language

Finally on to Simmon’s Labyrinth

Aaaaaaaaand they turn his into a giant joke. Figures. *sigh* Well, we got some good Donut and Grif centric shit these last few seasons so I can’t complain. Maybe Simmons will get his next season.

Tucker had a panic attack 😭

Grif smacking Kai for fucking with Tucker gives me life

And we get completely cockblocked on Caboose’s Labyrinth. Not gonna lie, I’m little disappointed on how this seasons has glossed over Cabooses character during certain scenes. But, I also understand that they’re taking the time to focus on characters that haven’t had a chance to shine in the spotlight, so I can’t be too upset. I still feel like they could have had something more than “I was hungry”, as a labyrinth for him.

Grif and Sarge both agreeing they want nothing to do with Carolina’s Labyrinth 😱

Awww yeah KICK YOUR ASS CAROLINA!

AAAAAAAH! THE MOI!!!

Not gonna lie, I almost expected past Carolina to pull Epsilon out at the last second and throw our Carolina completely off guard.

And the power of friendship wins

Oh hey Labyrinth AI

Genkins- AH LABYRINTH HAS THE CLUB!

FUCK HIM UP!

THEY ALL HAVE CLUBS! I love it!

Oh. Well shit.

Genkins: “HOW ARE YOU LIKE THIS!? HOW DO YOU DO IT!?” Sheer dumb luck, bro. You should know. You’ve lived out the whole series.

Oh hey, Lopez is alive. Called it.

Lord what a psychopathic laugh.

I’m actually kinda gonna miss Genkins.

“Only one paradox left to go.” Fuck.

Excuse me?! I did not ask for this beautiful sad music during this moment!

Caboose: “As long as it’s not Tuesday between 1 and 12” What kinda plans you got then, buddy?

Im actually surprised Grif still wants pizza after all that.

Wait, so no Donut next season? :(

Poor Lopez, as if he hasn’t seen enough shit already.

Sarge: “You know it’s a real shame I don’t speak Spanish?” GRIF DOES!

A bit lackluster for a Season finale, the most exciting moment being Carolina vs Carolina but as far as wrapping up stories go, I think Jason and Miles did a fantastic job concluding Joe’s. This season finally got Donut the recognition he deserved and also fillled in a few of the series plot holes.

I don’t know if Jason will be working on the next season or not, but if he is, I look forward to seeing what kind of story he has cooked up for the Reds and Blues.

[pyronado-moved]

idk who ghetsis is but i looked him up he looks homophobic

hes a bastard and deserves what he got in BW/B2W2

[concentratedfire]

You're not straight I'm so sorry some dumbass would say that

no need to apologize !! i mean id like an apology from them but u didnt send it so theres no need for u to apologize friend !!!! like u said theyre just dumb