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ilya believes in his sexual desirability/value but not his romantic desirability/value. that's why he stares in the mirror for so long after rose landry happens. he let himself believe in his own romantic value and it immediately backfired. in this essay i will

#this showww #oh my godddd #get me outtttt #sdksjdhsj #ilya rozanov #heated rivalry #hollanov #shane hollander

HALF MAN (2026; 1.06)

The most insane thing about it all is that everything from green her asking him to go see his mom till the original beef of Chicagoland has happened in 48-72 hours . They way they talked about each other in goodbye omg . That’s literally insane . OMFG he makes the lamb dish with syd’s wedding dress as inspiration. And syd makes her mom’s ribs ,them making each others favourite food,calming each other through panic attacks, asking for little bit of personal space, asking to not stare, sharing responsibilities, vibrant collaboration, the hamachi reveal syd making his favourite thing him making her , her second favourite bite . Carmy remembering how it made him feel when she walked in ( that unaired scene) and mimicking it for her to make her realise it’s exactly how it feels. ( thank you Tumblr for catching that - it has refried my brain) i mean it’s too much love the Michelin memory - the hug the way he reveals it to her and wants to remember her face. It’s just annoying to think about it that way. This all happened in 2-3 days They have way too much self control i cannot believe that the damn hasn’t broken yet. I cannot believe they are not folded into each others arms for enternity- the fade to black can only mean one thing we can not picture what happens next.

The theory of them hooking up between goodbye and ribs makes so much sense but if they didn’t the chance of it happening are so abundant . There is literally no reason not to. ( but they are not me- Carmy not being neurotypical canonically this season adds so much to all of this)

Syd being so sweet with him post goodbye is basically both of them accepting that they are so deep in love . my god there is so much there ?

They are so crazy for this. I can’t overstate the necessity of the one day format because it’s too much- we need to see it all ?? Like how does one person deal with living such lifechanging days??

Thanks for listening to my ted talk . Ig.

#sydcarmy #the bear #my ramblings #what crazy couple of days #this is such emotional whiplash my god #maybe them not kissing is good because then they would have to deal with that as well !??#IMAGINE BEING WHIPLASHED WITH SO MUCH LOVE #the way carm talks about syd in goodbye and the way they behave with each other my god they are so stupidly in love #they both are having the worst and best day at the same time?#both in the kitchen and outside the kitchen because of each other . ughhh #this showww #THE TEAM COMING TOGETHER THE CLOCK ENDING THE PARTNERSHIP AGREEMENT BEING OUT IT THE OPEN THEM HAVING THAT PERFECT COLLABORATIVE SERVICE #where everyone gets a win?? it was all leading up to thiss?

WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THE PARALLELS BETWEEN S1 EPISODE ONE AND S5 EP 1??? LIKE THE LIGHTING?? AND THEN GUILLERMO BRUSHING NANDOR'S HAIR?? AND THEN HOW HE BLOWS OUT THE CANDLES?? DRIVING ME INSANE!!!