Best/Worst
I am overanalyzing texts from a guy who lives in his car.
- Sweetface
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Best/Worst
I am overanalyzing texts from a guy who lives in his car.
- Sweetface
It's not always bad.
I banged a super hot guy in town from Australia for the week. He was gorgeous and good at sex. It's not all bad.
The Freelance Botanist
One summer, I met a really cute guy at a wedding. We got drunk, we made out in the woods, he invited me to a mid-week Phish concert in Vermont, he told me we would make beautiful ginger babies*...you know, the usual.
After the wedding, he ended up driving me back to town** and we went out to dinner. During dinner, we had the normal getting to know you conversation, and I asked him where he worked.
His reply? "Oh, I run a couple of grow houses." Ah, so that's how he managed to attend mid-week Phish concerts across the country.
- Sweet Face
* Neither of us had red hair.
** Criley ditched me.
Air Mattress #2
The same summer as Air Mattress Incident #1, I also had a short summer fling with a guy we called Mr. Worldwide. We were out at the bar; he invited me home. As we walked up the stairs to his apartment, he said "Don't make fun of me...I sleep on an air mattress."
I absolutely made fun of him. Our fling kind of fizzled after that.
Eligible Men of Tahoe: Update
I dated that guy for two months.
- Sweet Face
I Dated Ras Trent.
Unlike detective killer, I am NOT attracted to guys with dreadlocks. I have a job and wear deodorant. So does detective killer, but different strokes. Anyway, I met Ras Trent and he was beautiful (despite his blonde dreadlocks). We kindled our short-lived romance over a full Sunday of whiskey drinking.
We had literally nothing in common other than that we wanted to bang each other. At one point, he showed me the crystal he wanted to weave into his dreadlock. The majority of his waking hours involved smoking weed in a snowcat. He wore sarongs around the house. He swam naked in lake tahoe in December. He kept a tiny bottle of acid in his freezer.
Are you there, jah? It's me, criley. I will never again date a white rasta.
Natty Dreads
For some reason -- I am attracted to dreadlocks. Don't ask. I think it started when I dated someone with one dreadlock who cut it off because I changed his mind about love (so romantic, right?!). Lucky for me, I found a dreadlock man in Tahoe! As we walked hand in hand on that summer night we met, here's how part of the conversation went:
Me: Sooo, what do you want to do in the future?
Dreads: I just wanna, like, grow my herb and shred...you know?
No I don't actually. It's great to have passions and aspirations but I'm not sure that's what I had in mind.
Tip #1 for dating in Tahoe: Don't have high expectations--unless your highest expectations are to shred and grow herb.
Tip #2 for dating in Tahoe: If you're looking for someone who has future goals and aspirations--don't ask!
Needless to say, it didn't work out in the long run and I'm slowly weening myself off dreadlock infatuation. Lesson learned.
-Detective Killer
I banged someone that talked like John Ralphio.