Why does abandonment follow me? I’m great at being alone and can take on more that I should, but I still need and want support, especially if I’m taking care of shit for you.

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Why does abandonment follow me? I’m great at being alone and can take on more that I should, but I still need and want support, especially if I’m taking care of shit for you.
My problem with this stage of my life is that I know what is coming: success, community, safety, love. But for now and for a bit longer I have to keep doing this alone. After being alone emotionally for almost 27 years, it is hard to not be eager for connection and success when you know it’s attainable and your birthright.
What’s really cohesive are all these positive reviews for REP am I right or am i right????
@taylorswift
What if the point of this is to piss all of us off, get us to protest and further the divide
Existential Crisis (A Collection of Random Ramblings)
I AM HAVING SUCH A LARGE EXISTENTIAL CRISIS RIGHT NOW.
Guys, the Earth will one day no longer exist, and everything around us right now - the people, the places, the emotions, the cities, everything - will simply not exist as it does and will just return to being atoms...
And here we are right now, we have this life to live and we have emotions to express and people to love, yet we take it all for granted...this life is truly truly amazing and invaluable and we've been so privileged to have the ability to live.
When you realize that everything is going to return to atom form, you realize that it's not necessarily the material goods that make life worth living, but the human connections...that's special and cannot be replicated. There's a meaning to it that transcends our short lives and makes life worth living.
We're all going to die, so we have to appreciate this one life we've got and develop deep relationships with other people, who are on this crazy, wild journey with us. Love and friendship and all other emotions are so important - people will literally kill for it.....and here we are, putting a secondary importance on it...
Don't be afraid to do what you're scared of because in the end all of it won't matter - literally.
Been Thinking Lately...
I have this friend who posted her picture on a public Facebook page, and she messaged me sort of late at night with a link to the picture with all of its comments, so I look through them, as she was not the kind to message me for no reason at ten o'clock when I had to get up in the morning for school.
So I look through the comments. They were horrible. A great many commented on her being "ugly" and "looking funny", and how people felt bad for "her friends that had to look at her."
I felt like crying for my friend, right then, because I couldn't imagine getting that kind of response from complete strangers.
So I started thinking, after comforting her and laying down to sleep, and I began to wonder what kind of person you had to be to say something like that. I'm highly aware that some people feel a sort of invincibility on the internet, enabling them to say things that maybe they wouldn't say if you were face to face, but at the same time, why?
It's strange for me to think that people would say something horrible to another human being, when there is nobody that I know who would at all be okay with somebody calling them "ugly."
"Treat unto others the you wish to be treated, ".... Right?