#timberlina

[lewishamiltonstuff]

Death, taxes, and Lewis wearing his timbs everywhere

[mstimberlina]

Observations from The World’s No. One Environmentally-Friendly Drag Lady: BINGO’S BACK It’s been a while friends, but let’s get down to it. People are going out and the (BIG) BiNGO SHOW IS back last Thursday of the month at the Chelsea Theatre. Come bask in the ridiculous and confounding absurdities of the everyday by playing Bingo, with added louche cocktail hospitality, a sprinkle of spontaneous dance routines, cabaret banter and terrible sing-a-longs. If there’s one thing Lockdown taught me, is that when people aren’t racing everywhere it’s quiet and you can get things done- the garden was never tidier, the house cleaner, the food more locally sourced, the bread made every other day. Walks to the lake with Mr Timberlina and a flask of heady ready made home foraged cocktails. It was heaven.
Now- things are open again, we’re moving about and even I am accepting that this prologued fleeting misanthropic paradise has drawn to a close. I am so grateful for how fortunate I was during lockdown, that I pre-empted the whole affair by manifesting the perfect country idyl because I knew something was going to happen. Coincidence? Who can say, but I resolve to give myself some credit. And now I must advance to what looks to me like a new phase of even more incredulously absurd, rampantly self-obsession, of neo-liberal consumer capitalism, coupled with unadulterated, unnecessary consumption and of course, unadulterated FUN. To manage my ridiculous state of constant eco-anxiety and the state we are in, I have adopted Permaculture as a guide for life. With Permaculture we spend a lot of time observing our surroundings in order to inform us how best to proceed. And so, fo the first time since lockdown Permaculture hinted that I go to my local independent Pound Shop and buy a bunch of prizes for my bingo nights which are sporadically happening again. What Permaculture taught me is that they’re not just prizes, they are plastic Jesus crosses that GLOW in the dark and therefore, like Jesus, shall remain eternal and light up darkness because- that’s right, these crucifixes ACTUALLY GLOW IN THE DARK! Every week, for the best part of over a decade I’ve taken the ritual stroll my the local £1 Mecca to drown my sorrows and reconcile the puchase of these divine, SENSATIONAL, cheap plastic prizes. It always concerned me. But now, due to my observing the world, Permaculture has shown me just how f***ed we absolutely are and one of the best ways to escape how bad it is playing BINGO. I love the the paradox of being the world’s number one environmentally friendly drag lady who endures the hypocrisy of purchasing these bloody plastic things that people love. Because LOVE is the important thing. And since the local knitting group can’t work hard enough I am forced to rely on cheap plastic imports, objects that in the scheme of things are minuscule, but bring so much joy to people’s hearts, yet will unavoidably play a tiny part in the wilful destruction of mama-nature’s delicate ecosystem. As individuals we live in a perpetually perplexing system we did not create. We are therefore not responsible for it. But we are responsible for our actions and behaviour. We can change the system if we want to. Let’s change the world, let’s invite empathy, let’s celebrate our flaws, sing along in drunk abandon, be kind to each other. LET’S PLAY BINGO! Peace Out Ms T PS. It’s time to plant daffodil and tulip bulbs- no less than 15cm deep in soil or compost. I like to plant then in unexpected places, like other people’s gardens without telling them. Also, concreting over the surface of your bulbs is a sure fire way of preventing those pesky squirrels from digging them up.

[sixtodate]

#bingo #timberlina #warnersbaysportsclub #friends #wine #family #fun #wine #beer (at Warners Bay Sports Club) https://www.instagram.com/p/CGuBXaCjoyASMMUpmAiHWsg08tfZ_L_6z08Vxo0/?igshid=1fusaq7wfiaz6

[newcastleweddingsandevents-blog]

Who was lucky enough to be at @thetimberlina last night for the first ever Drag Bingo & Trivia for 2019 @southsmerewether! Seriously, amazing! Who wants to be part of the next one?! Like, Comment, Share this post so we can we bring this top shelf talent back again very soon! #southsmerewether #timberlina #eventsatsouths #dragbingo #trivia #fridayfun #topshelf #entertainment #qween (at Souths Merewether) https://www.instagram.com/p/Btpd_dsAqAT/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=14gdoj0tc5zar

[newcastleweddingsandevents-blog]

#Repost @southsmerewether • • • • • Cocktails tonight for Drag Bingo & Trivia with the fabulous and talented @thetimberlina here at @southsmerewether! Doors open 7pm, tickets still available, see you tonight ladies and gents! #southsmerewether #dragbingo #timberlina #cocktailhour #trivia #fridayfun #nightout #entertain (at Souths Merewether) https://www.instagram.com/p/BtnKfZFACtS/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=wrg42mdphdd

[newcastleweddingsandevents-blog]

Cocktails tonight for Drag Bingo & Trivia with the fabulous and talented @thetimberlina here at @southsmerewether! Doors open 7pm, tickets still available, see you tonight ladies and gents! #southsmerewether #dragbingo #timberlina #cocktailhour #trivia #fridayfun #nightout #entertain (at Souths Merewether) https://www.instagram.com/p/BtnKLmtAwft/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=57mwwjfa5sya

[imaginadium]

STARK DALLAS RELOADED

In a wildcard addition to our ‘classics reinvented’ series we visit the Mill Co Project in N1, where an alt-drag homage to 80s supersoap Dallas is playing until Sunday.

I have to declare an interest in reimaginings of the 80s Ewing saga, ever since appearing in a school production that shunned the traditional nativity play in favour of a Dallas-set retelling of Noah and his Ark. So it was with great anticipation I made my first visit to the Mill Co Project, in De Beauvoir Town, N1. Closer - in every way - to Dalston Kingsland than Dallas, Texas, this venue, a new creative social enterprise has nevertheless attracted big-hitting partners such as the Royal Court and the Barbican.

Stark Dallas Reloaded is a “Texas-sized glamour drama” created by self-styled tranny superstar Jonny Woo and bearded lady Timberlina, who also play warring Mrs Ewings while David Mills fills JR’s boots with aplomb.

Downing more liquor than you can hide under a ten gallon hat, Jonny Woo as the dipsomaniac Sue Ellen battles it out with Timberlina’s disingenuously wholesome Pam to become the pre-eminent Mrs Ewing. One clad in an armour of metallic blousons, the other in day-glo bodystockings, both come armed with swivel-eyed death stares. The wigs get wilder, the outfits gradually more dishevelled as the characters totter towards their booze-addled climax.

Part Southfork BBQ, part barn dance, part drag-fabulous anarchy, on the surface it appears a chaotically homespun production where on the surface nothing appears slicker than Sue Ellen’s lip gloss. But this is a well-observed pastiche, down to its authentic disregard for credible plotlines – the original being hard to out-do with its year-long dream sequences that stretched credulity to the Mexican border. For all its 14 long-running seasons and tales of Machiavellian millionaires, Dallas is revealed as a simple tale, spun – hilariously and repeatedly - around a dysfunctional family and fuelled by sexual frustration, the whisky tumbler and the telephonic non sequitur.

Seated on hay bales and tucking into beer and Big Apple hotdogs, the enthusiastic audience (comprising fans of Woo and co as much as of Dallas) enjoyed the show. As did the cast who occasionally could barely supress their giggling - in a candid acknowledgement at the absurdity of it all that was entirely lacking from the original TV cast’s performance.

Like all great and glorious parodies, you’ll come away with a host of new catchphrases and, if not an oil baron, at least perhaps a check-shirted dance partner from the post-show hoedown hosted by Rednecks DJ Hey Baylen.

STARK DALLAS RELOADED is at The Mill Co Project in Haggerston, N1, until Saturday 17th June.

Posted by Mark

[garconjon]

124. Tim: Vauxhall Station, London