This Is Scary
Every now and again something scary lands in the inbox here at the Asylum. It seems to be part of modern life.
It's not often however that the scary thing comes from our favourite supplier of seeds and plants for the garden. Their emails are usually interesting or boring, always colourful but never, ever scary.
But today, in their email, was a picture of this:
Our first thought was "Oh my God, it's a tomato with multiple gonads"!
But no, it's worse than that. It's a combination of a tomato and a potato plant that they've imaginatively named the TomTato(TM).
Wondering what sort of horticultural Victor Frankenstein had created this, we read on (albeit from behind the sofa) to be reassured that this was no Monsanta inspired GM abomination but (oh yes this is a quote) that the "plant is specially grafted by hand to create this unique double cropping feature. There's no genetic modification - it's an all-natural, and safe process."
Now, we're in no position to judge whether or not there is indeed no genetic modification or if it's safe. But we think we're on pretty sound ground (unlike the spuds in the photo) to argue that it is in no way "all-natural".
Doubtless, someone will correct us if we're wrong, but we've never seen a tomato, a potato (or indeed any other plant) slice a bit of itself off and graft itself to another plant as part of a natural process of evolution. It's about as "all natural" as chopping the head off an eagle and sewing on to the body of a lion and proclaiming "Look, a Gryphon!"; or sewing of bits of dead criminals together and calling it human life.
It's even got a Latin name: "Solanum tuberosum".
I think they should add another element and call it "Solanum tuberosum Frankenstein"
Finally, there's an interesting practical problem with it as can be seen from the photo. The spuds are ready before all the tomatoes. My guess is that if you try and get the spuds by digging up the plant, well, it might die. And then you've just got... potatoes. Like you would get from... a potato plant.
So, seventeen years to develop an impractical plant. This is what happens when scientists go mad and forget to read Frankenstein.