Hey, I know I've asked before, but I am again at a point where I really, really need to find another place to live. I am scared, living here.
The man my mother is dating is a blatant racist and literally just said that the only reason police are being "demonized" for the murders of black people is because of our "n*gger president" and "black people murder cops all the time" and "black people are out there murdering other black people in the streets." He proudly wears the "Rebel Flag" and I finally called him out on his shit and flat-out called him disgusting. But that's honestly the final straw.
Now I'm afraid that I'm going to either be hurt or kicked out because I'm speaking out against this shit. Last time I tried to tell my mom about something as small as a joke he made that made me uncomfortable, she told me I needed to get over it or get out. I'm honestly afraid at this point that I'm going to be kicked out if I try to stand up for myself any more.
My mother is and has been emotionally abusive for a very long time. I've put up with it only because I have had no other choice, and I have no money or way of making money right now to move out and pay rent.
But I am continuing to deteriorate, here. I am constantly depressed and afraid. I don't leave my room. I don't talk to people here unless I have to. I am not seeing any improvement in my mental health because of the conditions I am forced to live in, and I really cannot take this anymore.
If you can please, please find me anywhere to live, I would be eternally grateful. I'm not able to pay rent, but I can offer any of the skills at my disposal as a trade. I can cook and do things around the house to the best of my ability in exchange for a safe place to live.
Please dear gods I am so afraid. I cannot live here anymore.
