re: macaroons & inappropriate conduct
*knocks, walks in, clears throat* Now, this is not an apology. I starkly refuse to apologise for telling the truth! And, equally, I refuse to apologise for my (mild) inappropriate conduct. Dearest High King, being mildly inappropriate is the centerfold piece of my charm! 🌝 However,
I do offer some reparations concerning your ah, discomfort. *slides over a plate*
Let it be known - I am not the one to be outdone in my own domain, which is baking. ‘tis mine ground and I will defend my baker's honour with fervour, triple chocolate brownies... Or even flambé, if it comes to that! 🙂↔️ (#greatLindonBakeOff ?)
*The elf squints at the plate. 🤨🍫 Ams crossed. Fingers tapping. The tension is real.*
Soooo... no apology. No remorse... but brownies? 🤔
*Pauses. Picks one up. Takes a bite. 1- Repeats action. 2- Repeats action.... and just to make sure 3- Repeats action*
Nothing about this is mild. TRIPLE chocolate is a force of nature. 🍫🌪️ The sugar is a full-scale catastrophe. 💥⚡ The brownies... CONQUERED. Resistance is futile. 🍫🏰🏆🔥
*Pauses. Considers life choices. Considers the vast spectrum between
mild-mildy-mildeness=catastrophe??? + Flambé 💥💣 🔥 “OH NO.” *sugar HITS. Eyes widen. The glow intensifies* ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨👀✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Ok my friend.. Your tactics are bold. Your defiance, unwavering. Your baking skills? Unreasonably effective. *nods solemnly, * Very well. Your baker’s honor is safe. Reparations accepted. 😌🍫💙💙💙 Go wreck havoc🌪️🌪️🌪️ 👆👉 BUUUT please do keep me out of the explosion radius. 💣
*turns and gets out*
OH. OH, THIS IS POWER. THIS IS— a tactical mistake. 😵💫 II’m hearing colors. I’m seeing music.
Pauses. Regains composure.
LINDOOOOON, LET’S PARTY. 🎉🔥🍫✨
