I remember slumping to the ground, sitting on the floor of my bathroom, with my back against the tub. She was all I could think about.
No, I wasn't busy drawing our names within hearts in my mind, though I would most certainly admit she captivated me. But no, there were no thoughts about relationships, cute photos or scrawling sweet nothings on each other's Facebook wall. Just a single word. A single exclamation. Wow.
Not that I've had a particularly long life, nowhere close to hitting the ripe old age of 79 or anything like that. I'd like to think I'd been around the block enough, but I digress.
Someone who could finally make me sift through the bullshit I had so often let stand in my way. Someone who pushed me to question why I rarely stepped out of my comfort zone. Someone who wouldn't let me be afraid of pursuing what I wanted just because there was something to lose.
I haven't been surrounded by people who nod vigorously in agreement to my every whim. The ones nearest and dearest were usually attentive enough to bend down and scream sobering lines of abuse at me if they realized I was slipping down a muddy slope. Ropes and safety harness would come soon after, but I supposed they cared enough about my soul not pull me up the entire the way. The rest of the climb was always good for the clearing of my head.
And yet, she was not like them.
No, I found out she was not like them at all.
She challenged me in more ways than I would care to admit to her. I never quite liked challenges posed to me by anyone else but myself. But it seemed with every hoop of fire I jumped through, every leap of faith I made, I would understand her world that little bit more.
I wanted that little bit more.
I might have known things would have gone this way. I would not have chosen differently.
