#txf textpost

[gebediahhhhhhh]

daydreaming about how the world would be a better place if the x-files was a sitcom. funny episodes only. mythology is canceled

[gebediahhhhhhh]

once again thinking about the fact that the x-files literally invented straightbaiting. you know it’s like queerbaiting but the relationship is straight. and it’s not really a slowburn because of all the “we just work together” and “their relationship is platonic” and stuff.

[gebediahhhhhhh]

[gebediahhhhhhh]

I wanted to post something like “Fox Mulder is the closest to a man written by a woman that we could get” but then I thought about it for a minute and realized that he’s not. we just collectively gaslighted ourselves into thinking that he’s That Good of man when in reality he’s just hot in a pathetic way

[gebediahhhhhhh]

CRACK AU IDEA

Emily doesn’t die, and her and Scully live a happy little family life for a couple of years already. Mulder is not “officially” a part of the family yet, and Emily knows him only as mom’s funny friend from work who comes to play with her at the weekends. Until it’s Christmas time, and Scully asks Mulder to play the role of Santa Claus; knowing her daughter, she would sleep in the living room the whole night, waiting for Santa to come. Mulder obviously agrees to put on a costume and sneak into Scully’s house at night. They buy a costume and a fake beard and plan the event, so Mulder can come at night unnoticed, put presents under the tree, and leave (to Scully’s bedroom, actually). Mulder’s great at undercover work and he does everything perfectly, even stealing a cookie from the plate in the kitchen. And he’s ready for Emily to notice him, when she wakes up hearing his steps. What he’s not ready for is a conversation that the girl starts the next day. The whole Scully family is here and Mulder is also here as Dana’s “friend”. It’s not his first Christmas with the Scullys, although something is not right. Emily has been acting weird with him all morning, and Mulder starts suspecting that she’s recognized him. Already being slightly anxious that he might’ve ruined the Christmas miracle for the little girl, Mulder comes to her and tries to find out what’s bothering her. Emily finally admits that she knows that Mulder is actually Santa Claus, but it’s going not where Mulder thought… and…

[saintskywalker]

Me: idc abt the William storyline *mulder and scully daydream about being parents* Me: *crying* hahaha I love dying and being dead

[saintskywalker]

iscrowleydeadyet replied to your post

Do Dana Scully.

what do i hate about dana scully?

i hate the way she looks at her nerdy fbi partner. no one wants to see that, get a room already, gah!

i hate that she thinks the name bambi is a stupid name for a woman. i was going to name my future daughter bambi but it's all ruined it now. yeah, thanks a lot scullster.

i hate that she refers to lite cream cheese as "not even real cream cheese". i feel this is discriminatory against low calorie dairy products.

i hate her beauty that is beyond compare

i hate her flaming locks of auburn hair

i hate her ivory skin

and her eyes of emerald green

[saintskywalker]

alaynestone replied to your post “top 5 x-files episodes”

<3 i kind of want to do a mini rewatch so those lists would be helpful too if you made them.

ah cool, drop me a msg whenever and tell me what sorta x-files viewing you want to be doing, i will have a list ready in like half a minute lol