#unbridledrunning

[unbridledrunningblog]

03/23/03 03/23/23. I have been doing well with controlling my depression. Recently I started feeling it all over me again and wow has it slowed me down. I was wondering why. Then I started having pain in my shoulders and that was a clue is was getting triggered. I still didn’t know why. Then I realized that I had been a part of the war 20 years ago. I’m still shocked. I didn’t expect to live through the war and I sure didn’t expect it to last so many years. Now I’m experiencing waves of anger then deep sadness. IT’s grief. The grief is better than not feeling. Letting myself grieve is just another step in the recovery ❤️‍🩹 process. I look at my myself in the pictures and I see my anger now, it wasn’t nothing but a protective response to hide from feelings then. Picture 1# Easter at Saddam’s palace overlooking his rebuilt version of Babylon. 2# taking a break is assault of some town in Ah Najaf. Next is a comparison of 101st with no destiny and 20 years ago on the next Rendezvous. Now on to make my own destiny and another run for today to help ease my mind and rest my soul. #unbridledrunning #dailypractice #veteran #mentalhealthawareness #ptsd #depressionawareness (at Iraq - Al-Hillah, Babylon) https://www.instagram.com/p/CqJ_wBVuk8C/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[unbridledrunningblog]

Getting ready for the start of another 💯. I was reminded of how my running story has helped other veterans put their issues down and pick up running. Blessed beyond dreams. Remembering that 16 years ago I went left when people were saying go right and stop running, I kept going. Now I’m finding out that my story of that has encouraged people to change life decisions they were about to make. So that’s my why for my 💯 tomorrow. #unbridledrunning #ultrarunnerproblems #ultrarunning #100milerun #veteran #veteranawareness #mentalhealthawareness #dailypractice #intentionalliving #suicideawarness #changeyourmindsetchangeyourlife (at Huntsville State Park) https://www.instagram.com/p/CoN9KkapuNH/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[unbridledrunningblog]

This is not the famous #stairwaytoheaven @fort_benning_mcoe but it was my staircase to get there. It took me months to be able to run this hill without stopping to get to the top. Sometimes I’d try a few times a day. Sunday morning and 16 years later it was just another hill I was running on. I was at the top before my legs felt any work. The top felt different this time, there was No anger anymore just love for myself in doing the work. We all need a hill to get us stronger. Echoing the song “it’s the climb” and feeling so much excitement going up that hill. Now I had the knowledge that I didn’t have to try, I would just go and be me. I shook out my hair and left some stuff up there that I no longer needed. Then flew down the hill again now with the knowning how to run both directions. Go find a hill and see what it can do for you. #unbridledrunning #dailypractice #itstheclimb #hillrepeats #trainingforthe444 #ultrarunning #dailymotivation #lifechanging #veteran #mentalhealthawareness (at Phenix City, Alabama) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnzksKGJ6E0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[unbridledrunningblog]

Sunday was a big day for me. Not only did I hit a year straight of running every day but I came back to the place where it both ended and started for me. This park is where I started to run September 25th of 2006. Two days before was my last attempt at suicide. This park held the sacred space for me to let an old life die and a new life emerge. Sunday I was reminded of all the people who said I couldn’t run, the struggles and the hard sleepless nights. Physically I remember the route to be much harder and the hills much much higher. Sunday I was running on clouds. The life I have today is so much more than I could have ever imagined or dreamed up then. I’m just saying that the difference was that I put action to my despair. That created hope that dreamed a dream. The dream became a quest of trials and errors. That process built something that no one thought would happen. #unbridledrunning #dailypractice #trainingforthe444 #trainingforlife #mentalhealthawareness #veteranscrisisline #veterans #gratitude #livingmybestlife #intentionalliving #suicideprevention #ultrarunning (at Idle Hour Park) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnzhkjVpNJh/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[unbridledrunningblog]

When your in the bush and you get a thorn in your foot 🦶 you get another thorn to dig it out… when we are trapped we can use another trap to free ourselves we just don’t need to pick up the new trap 🪤. #unbridledrunning #dailypractice #mantra #awareness #ultrarunningtraining #trainingforthe444 #ramdass #mentalhealthawareness #veterans (at Ridgetop, Tennessee) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnnhZpJpkqj/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[unbridledrunningblog]

Got a few in myself then came back to pick up some friends. Getting by or getting the miles in with help from my four legged friends 🐕. They were all very excited to run 🏃. #unbridledrunning #dailypractice #ultrarunningtraining #ultrarunning #trainingforthe444 #getbywithalittlehelpfrommyfriends #sundayfunday #longrunsunday (at Greenbrier, Tennessee) https://www.instagram.com/p/CndhoDyO03F/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[unbridledrunningblog]

Short run day for a change. Chilly 🥶 weather again and some snow ❄️. Keeping the practice and dream alive one day at a time. #unbridledrunning #dailypractice #ultrarunningtraining #ultrarunning #trainingforthe444 (at Ridgetop, Tennessee) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnaIV2aJHBX/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[unbridledrunningblog]

Running, one thing that running has brought me is the knowing that the sun ☀️ is coming. #unbridledrunning #dailypractice #trainingforthe444 (at Greenbrier, Tennessee) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnW-IICuoAy/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=