#venty rant

[noodles-07]

Is anyone else in that weird state where... you haven’t come out but... they know? Like.... they gotta know at this point right? Heterosexuals don’t go on rants about gay rights because of the Warriors books when they’re 12. Heterosexuals don’t FIERCELY defend peoples pronouns. But like... nobody said anything so I’m ??? Like, do you think I’m gay? Do you know I’m not cisgender? How much have you caught on to, dudes?

[ramblingpeanut]

I'm Tired

I'm tired of everyone dumping their feelings around me. I'm tired of people claiming they understand when they so clearly don't. Every time I talk about it, the people I talk to claim "they're the same way" but then act in ways that makes it clear they're not.

Now I don't want to invalidate what they're feeling, clearly they feel something too. But it makes me wonder that maybe, even to those who claim to be like me, I'm a freak.

I'm an "empath" or whatever. I have a higher affinity for reading and even taking on other people's feelings. I have no control over it, I just feel like an empty cell until I'm around other people, mimicking what they feel until I'm so overwhelmed I want to break.

I talk about it with many people, searching for someone to give me answers or to even understand, but everytime they tell me "they're the same way", I observe that really, they aren't. I don't want to tell them they aren't empaths, because clearly they do feel some semblance of the label... but it makes me wonder if I'm something else entirely.

[neverknewatall]

Can the new girl at work like not go on 10 minute breaks every hour?? Kcool.

[chaotic-oracle]

whoa whoa whoa i was just fucking kidding no need to get your panties in a bunch

though, thanks for the "positive" reinforcement

really appreciate it

//sarcasm

[mcfkn]

ugggh i keep fluctuating between feeling okay about being a waitress and being a giant stress-ridden mess in a "wow u frickin suck at everything ur gonna suck" way.  and it's like why. why can i not be normal and not so fucking upset by this and so angry at myself for not being immediately '''''''perfect'''''' and ready to go on my first day.  wow.  frickin impressed i can make myself this upset over nothing.  slow clap it out.

[ohh-c0mely]

Acceptance is key. 

[jedihorse]

Melon

Why Melon?

Who knows!

I am jobless, bored (granted it is nearly 3 in the morning...) and probably about to go full on crazy. Why? Because the human interaction is happening periodically less and less, I have no money to go out and have fun.

I fear that when I do get a magical thing called employment - the second monies come in I will snap and go on a three day bender. Or not. I am not so exciting.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOORED.

Maybe I should leave the house later today, rather than laze around. Haha I am funny. I will sleep instead. :D