#ventz

[rotting-lilac]

370 calories in one singular muffin....

[zip-toonz]

Hey all. I keep having my artwork used without my permission sometimes even with my signature edited out. If you happen to see artwork on a page that does not belong to me (my username is always some variation of zip toonz) or even a page you suspect to be stealing my identity please let me know. Im sick and tired of my work being used without permission or credit. Im on my last straw.

[guooey]

when I first realized I was gay I was like “oh crap, this is cool!” but now I’m starting to understand the loneliness that comes with it. Add that onto being a kid that always had friends surrounding me but never felt close to any of them, I feel like a rubber ducky floating in the pacific ocean!!

[ventznation]

Mmh....idk what to feel....

[rotting-lilac]

Sorry everyone, I should've at least given an explanation but I could only now stop crying officially

So now here's an explanation

TW; animal death, graphic descriptions, disturbing topics, etc

My dog just died this morning, in my room. I still am not coming to real terms with this so I will sound hysterical and out of it

I went to my room to check on him this morning and found him dead, cold, still, and lifeless on my bed. I touched him thinking he was sleeping with his eyes open again. Now, the image is stuck in my head and wouldn't leave all day

When I touch my other pets I feel his cold lifeless body. When I let my mind think for even a second it shows me the same memory, of his dead body just laying there. It won't go away so I have barely been able to do anything

I haven't slept in 29 hours and just ate for the first time in over 24 hours. So I will not be fully there if I talk to anyone, and I apologize

He's buried in the yard now, I don't know when he died but when I found him it was around 7:20 am. It's now past 11:20 pm.

I've been going through severe mood swings, breakdowns, panic attacks and episodes all day long so I am very unstable right now

I don't want to talk much about it here, I just wanted to get this explanation out

[rotting-lilac]

I wish I could be positive 24/7

I never want to be a negative person

But I can't always be happy, I just wish I could

It's so much easier to play a part.

[rotting-lilac]

Why is it always "but they're your parents!"

and never "they're your children."

[rotting-lilac]

uhm. I probably won't be online for a long while again, or at least a lot less. something bad has happened that I'm not ready to talk about yet, and I'm not exactly handling it well..

I'll be okay, I think. love you all :(