That’s right everyone, it took me way way way too long, but I have finally caught up to Dream in the writing of this series. (I think. This post has not been fact-checked.) My nails are too long, my polish is not my favorite color and I don’t know why I chose it, I’m watching a movie I have so far flawlessly predicted the characters and plot points of as I write this, and my body is revolting against me in the same fashion it always does, but I’m still here. Oh also I move out on Monday and that’s deeply unsettling to me but now ask me if I’d rather not. Anyway, I guess we’ll start the angst hours now.
Edit: I moved out! It was not as bad as I thought it was going to be. So far so good.
Disclaimer: This series is based off of the lovely Faint of Heart series by @dreamwritesimagines and it’s sequel series, Crown of Hearts. I would highly recommend both series!
Taglist:@dreamwritesimagines @rhabakoli @finnickfoxes
Chapter Six: The girl was a whirlwind of anger and bitterness, her rage consuming her. She could hear no reason and no advice over the roaring fury in her ears. And when you have a storm inside of you, you also have a choice to make. You can let it destroy you, or you can let it out, and the girl had come too far to be destroyed now.
Isolde did not want to get out of bed today. In fact, she never wanted to leave it again. This time though, it was not because she’d had too much liquor the night before. She was never having a drop of that ever again. Clearly, it made her make mistakes, made her too trusting. Silly girl.
“My lady,” Dagny said, interrupting her wallowing.
“Yes, Dagny?” Isolde rolled over under the heavy furs protecting her from Kattegat’s morning chill.
“Her Majesty the Queen requests your presence.”
“I don’t suppose royalty takes rainchecks, do they?”
“Not that I am aware of.” Dagny smirked slightly.
Isolde groaned but got up out of bed anyway, a slow, reluctant thing. There were dark circles under her eyes from all the unfortunate realizations of the day before, but largely, she did not look half as bad as she felt on the inside. And another plus, she didn’t appear to actually have any large, gaping wounds, despite how she might have felt. By the time she finished getting dressed, she almost looked like she might have been fit to see the queen.
Snapdragon was in her chambers, cradling her son in her arms and cooing Viking lullabies to him. The sound might have been soothing before, but right now it just made Isolde want to break something. Preferably the earl’s face. Beside the bed was a woman with bright red hair, and part of a smile began to grow on Isolde’s face when she realized who it was.
The redhead smiled infectiously, rushing over to hug her. “Oh, my darling. It’s been too long.”
“Where were you? They told me you betryaed the king and took a Viking lover and all sorts of wild things, but when I got here there was no you to ask about it, and I didn’t get word from anyone else-”
“Oh little love,” Bree said, “I was on a raid. I’m so terribly sorry that none of these fools told you.”
Isolde stiffened, the smile dropping off her face at the word raid. “You...went on a raid.”
“Yes, yes, I know it’s unconventional for women to fight in wars back home, but come now, you’re more progressive than that-”
“I am not so progressive that I support the slaughter of an innocent people.” Isolde’s voice had gone cold.
“Isolde...what has happened to you?”
“A war, Bree. Did they not tell you?”
“Tell me what?” There was a hint of something in her voice that was not confusion or curiosity, but fear.
Bree let out a sharp breath. “...Beatrice. Our Beatrice?”
“Yes. But I suppose it doesn’t matter when it’s not your cousin, does it? It doesn’t matter when it’s just war, just a raid. If you don’t know who’s dead then why care?”
“Of course you didn’t. Was there anything else you’ll be needing your majesty, or did you merely wish to inform me my cousin had returned?”
Snapdragon squinted at her in a very sharp way.
Isolde grit her teeth but sat anyway.
“What has happened? Something has happened to upset you. To change your mind.”
“Change my mind on what? As far as I’m concerned my mind has returned to its original state. The truth.”
“You know, some of the poets say that no one actually knows the truth. I would argue you certainly don’t. You’ve hardly given these people a chance.”
Isolde’s eyes flashed. “I gave them more than a chance. I gave them my trust, and they broke that. When were you going to tell me what the earl was really like?”
“Well, it seemed as though you knew. A kind, caring man who would do anything to protect what he loves. That is usually how he presents himself, isn’t it? Or am I just remarkably good at reading people?”
“What? What terrible, horrible thing happened? Tell me, my dear, and I’m sure we can right it.”
“Can you right the fact that your precious Earl Eric is just another Viking warlord who comes home covered in blood rejoicing in the spoil of his kills and bedding every maiden who bats her eyelashes at him?”
Snapdragon stared at her a moment before nodding. “Oh. Well, I see what this is about.”
“Yes. I believe I do. But first, allow me to assuage your fears. The only people Earl Eric has ever hurt, to my knowledge, are the sort of men you would condone the harm of. The very sort of men who did all those unspeakable things back at your home are the sorts of men the Earl fights. He has a code of honor, you know. Never women, never children. Only those trying to harm him and those he has seen harm others.”
Isolde did not like whatever she was feeling now. Largely because she didn’t know what she was feeling now. Should she feel lied to still, but by an entirely different person? Should she still feel angry with the earl? It was...confusing. She felt confused, and that was all that she knew.
“...oh. Well, it doesn’t matter. He’s still a...a...a floozy.”
“A floozy?” The queen arched a brow. “Hardly. The girls make their best attempts, but I have yet to see him actually take one up on their offer. Not since you came around, anyhow. Even before then he was far less...active than most of the warriors coming home.”
“What...what do you mean not since I came around??
“Oh, you know. He’s been far too busy with his duties with you to think of anyone else. I suspect he hardly thinks even of himself anymore.”
“I....I said horrible things to him,” Isolde whispered.
“Did you call him a floozy?” Snapdragon wasn’t even pretending not to be amused.
Isolde winced. “Much worse.”
“Might I suggest you swallow your pride and apologize now instead of being mad at each other for months on end and miserable?”
The look Snapdragon gave her told her not to ask any further questions.
“Go. Go now. And you can talk to Bree later. Earl Eric won’t know what to do without you around. I expect he’s just running around like a chicken with his head cut off.”
Isolde smiled softly. “I expect he is. He tends to do that.”
Isolde was only slightly ashamed to admit that she dragged her feet down the halls of the castle and deliberately took the long way to any location that Earl Eric could possibly be, starting with the ones he was least likely to be at. Alas, this strategy could only work for so long, and eventually, she came upon him.
He cut a downtrodden figure, sitting in a back corner of the blacksmith’s workshop studying his work. His eyes seemed to be transfixed by the flames, so much so that he didn’t even notice her until she sat by his feet. She figured if she was going to apologize she had best do it well, and if that involved groveling at his feet, she deserved it.
“I’m sorry.” She spoke quietly, hesitant to disrupt the orderly din of the blacksmith’s workshop as he forged what looked like a battle axe, perhaps. “You did not deserve any of the things I said to you, and there is no excuse for my behavior last night. I hope that someday you may be able to forgive me.”
She was not brave enough to look at him as she said this, and so she did not see the softening of the pain on his face.
“Why? You say there is no excuse, but that does not mean there was no reason. What did I do to provoke such fury?”
He sounded so hurt that Isolde had to shut her eyes against the sharp, stinging wetness building in them.
“It was...it was nothing you did. It was something someone said about you that I was foolish enough to believe, that is all.”
“What did they say? And who said it?”
“A friend of mine. He...he painted a very brutal picture of you coming back from raids, I’m afraid. I don’t believe he knew you had any sort of code of honor, and neither did I until this morning. He also gave a very...detailed idea of your prowess with women.” Isolde hated how bitter she sounded on that last part.
To her surprise, the earl’s next words dared to sound amused.
“Oh? Is that what made you so mad, little icicle?”
She turned her head to look at him, a steady glare on her face from being mocked.
“Worry not. My attention is far too devoted to you now to worry about anyone else. I have a job to do, you know.” He sounded like he was about to laugh.
“I despise you.” There was no malice in it this time.
Her cheeks pinkened quickly, but she told herself it was just the heat of the forges.
“Come on now. We have to go show the queen we made up. She’ll be quite pleased.”
“No. Well, yes, but that’s neither here nor there. I would have come myself, the Queen simply sped up the process a bit. I’m a horrible coward and was too afraid to face you, but I was more afraid of what she would do to me if I didn’t. She has that hawk you know.” Isolde shuddered.
“I would never let Eitr hurt you.” He tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear.
“You’ll have to excuse me for not taking any chances.”
Was she even saying anything, or was she just pushing air out of her mouth? Because she might as well have been doing the latter for how breathy that was.
“Come now. You’ll keep us here forever if we don’t start walking,” she huffed.
Then, before she could second guess it, she took his hand to pull him along. He was so surprised that he followed easily, despite being a good foot taller than her. She smirked to herself. Two could play at this game.
“So who is this friend of yours who has such a bad opinion of me?”
And there she was blushing again. “No one.”
“No one?” That was not a happy tone of voice.
“No one at all. Just a friend.”
“Well, she seems to dislike me.”
“I’m sure he has nothing against you. Just rumors and all.” She prayed he would be distracted by the rest of the conversation and not notice the he.
“It is a man then.” The Earl didn’t sound surprised, but he also sounded solidly, definitely unhappy.
Isolde looked back at him to see the frown settling into his face, jaw working hard. Even when he was conflicted and angry he was attractive. She supposed.
“Yes. But no matter. We shouldn’t speak of it anymore.”
“Why not?” He raised a brow.
Well, she couldn’t exactly say because she didn’t want to.
“Because it’s making you moody, Earl. I much prefer your smiles.”
That wasn’t entirely true. She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t at least a little intrigued by this different side to the man. But that was neither here nor there.
“Then coax one out of me,” he challenged.
She did love a good challenge. “Alright then. Floki in one of my old dresses.”
Immediately he was laughing, and so was she. The picture was so comical it was hard not to. The triumphant grin on her face revealed how pleased she was with herself.
“You do not fight fair little icicle.” He was, of course, smiling as she continued to drag him through the halls of the castle.
“I can’t afford to. I’m rather small. I have to use my wits, or else I’d be dead by now.”
“Do not worry about that. I will protect you.”
She stopped, frowning. “You know you don’t have to, right?”
“What?” He stopped dead, causing her body to lurch back when she did not stop with him and their hands remained intertwined.
“You don’t have to protect me just because your queen ordered it. You don’t have to...follow me, or be nice to me, or whatever it is you’re doing, just because she says so. If you don’t-If you would rather not be around me, I can arrange for that.”
He stared at her for a long moment.
“I would very much like to be assigned to care for you for the rest of my life. It is my favorite of all my duties, and the only one I never tire of.”
“Oh. Well.” She looked up at him with wide eyes. “I suppose this is ideal then.”
He smiled. “Yes, I suppose that it is.”
Gently, he raised her hand, his breath brushing across her knuckles and then his lips. Gosh, she wished he wouldn’t do that. She would never be able to walk anywhere if her legs turned to pudding first.
“Right then. On our way.” Just keep walking, just keep walking.
As Isolde had discovered at a very early age, all roads lead back to the great hall. The path they were currently on was no exception, and sooner rather than later they stumbled upon her royal majesty.
Isolde dropped the earl’s hand like it had burned her as soon as they were in the presence of others. She still felt though that everyone was watching them, or that someone had seen. That was one part of the court you never grew out of. The feeling of everyone’s eyes being on you. She wondered if farmers and merchants ever got that feeling or if they were just able to live in peace. She suspected the latter was the case.
“Your majesty.” Isolde curtsied even as Snapdragon rolled her eyes.
“I see you two made up.” She had a knowing grin on her face.
“Yes. We are on much better terms now.” It hurt Isolde to admit it, seeing that smug look on Snapdragon’s face.
“I knew you two wouldn’t be able to stay mad at each other for long.”
“Yes, yes, and you were right.” Isolde rolled her eyes.
Ivar sat by his queen’s side, not saying a word. Instead, he chose to glare at the earl, who was looking a bit gloomy himself.
“What troubles you, Earl Eric?” Snapdragon asked.
“Oh, nothing your majesty.” He pulled up a forced smile.
“You are a terrible liar.”
“I assure you, there is nothing that you need to be worried about.”
“I suppose I will have to take you at your word. I cannot very well let my husband torture information out of you in the great hall.”
She half-laughed at herself, clearly very oblivious to how pleased her husband looked at the suggestion. Isolde still could not puzzle out how they were together. Other than the arranged marriage bit, of course.
For a moment, she was just as confused as the queen to the earl’s mood. Just a moment ago he had been more than cheerful enough. Now, he was frowning. She found her answer though looking down to his hands, where one was noticeably empty where it had not been before, fingers fidgeting. Oh. Was that what he was worried about?
Well, she couldn’t very well hold his hand in the great hall in front of everyone where someone could see it and take it the wrong way. Then again, she found herself wishing to see him smile again. So, mustering up what cleverness she had, she managed a compromise. She smiled at him, hoping to wipe away that frown, and gently placed her hand on his arm. It wasn’t there long, only a moment or two. No one else would notice.
It would have worked flawlessly if Bree hadn’t walked in at that moment and had the uncanny ability to see through Isolde’s every move. She had been doing that since they were children and it never got less irritating or nervewracking. So of course, the moment she approached the table she gave Isolde a smile that, if you didn’t know her, might make you think she was planning on murdering you and dumping the body at the bottom of the lake.
On the bright side though, the Earl was smiling again.
Isolde supposed that she would have to take the small victories and her cousin could wait until tomorrow.
