#visit days

[pleasegostudy]

Advice for grad school visits?

Hey gradblr universe — I’m attending a few PhD program visit days soon, and I’d love any and all advice for how to make the most of them. What questions should I ask students, professors, whoever else? What do you wish you had asked/known/thought about when comparing programs? Thanks in advance! 😊📚

P.S. If it helps to know my field, I’m looking at economics and political science programs.

[ourfosterlove]

Supervised Visit #1

Well, technically #2 for Juniper, but I only picked her up for the first time after the last one. 

It was...okay, I guess. I hate visit days. Perhaps that’s a failing on me as a foster parent, but they just suck, and I think that’s true for everyone involved. Juniper had a tantrum when we left because last time bio Mom brought temporary tattoos and she wanted more. When we told her there weren’t any she just melted.

No junk food, which is a first for me. Witnessed some super permissive stuff going on though, which helps explain why Juniper absolutely despises being told no. She tested that several times after the visit, but we’re staying consistent and hopefully some part of her appreciates that.

She asked for her bio Mom for the first time after visit. She cried some, and we told her it’s perfectly okay to be sad and miss her Mom, and that her Mom misses her too. She settled after about 20-30 minutes and was totally happy the rest of the night. Poor kid has got to be so confused.

Bean Sprout just slept, but our routine with him got a little shifted because of the visit. Threw us all off really. At least Juniper took a nap after.

Bio Grandparent requested to the worker that we bring Juniper to a local amusement park in a couple weeks because their family is all going, and they want her to come. Worker said it’s up to us. We already have one of the kids’ doctor appointments that day, but we probably wouldn’t have anyway. For one thing, that place is expensive and we’d have to pay for both of us and Juniper. Plus, I don’t like to do supervision of visits, especially not in the community, if at all possible. Too much room for he-said-she-said or “they told me this.” And no one to back you up if something goes wrong. Especially at an amusement park in the summer when it would be so hot and crazy.

I don’t know, today was just a hard day. It feels like you get into a routine, and then a visit pops up and destroys everything.

There’s still a chance the kids could be going to a relative at court in a couple weeks. I’ll be honest, if they do I’ll be devastated, not only for selfish reasons, but because it would not be a safe place for them to go.

Bean Sprout has a feeding in a couple minutes, so I’m going to go. We did some newborn pictures tonight and they turned out so so well. Wish I could post them here, but just imagine the cutest baby ever, and you’ve got it. He’s doing so well with eating and regulating his temperature. Grow little Bean Sprout, grow.

Contemplatively,

-S.

[apriltuesday]

Thoughts on visit days:

This is exhausting!  And it's even more so on the other side, as the visitor rather than the visited.  How did I ever do this?  Multiple times?

My office is officially the poster child for awesome grad student offices.  "Is that Rainier?"  (Disclaimer: it's not Rainier.  Just the Cascades rising behind Bellevue and Lake Washington.  Still pretty nice though.)

Fond memories of last year's GRAIL lunch as a prospective myself, when we talked a lot about solar sails and not too much about computer science (thanks, Adam).

Of course the sunshine emerges once the prospectives leave.

[apriltuesday]

The prospective grads are coming!  The prospective grads are coming!  Quick, prepare your research spiel and five reasons why UW is different from (BETTER than) all the other schools (for EVERYBODY)!

Collaboration!

We're smart AND social!

Seattle!

Did I mention collaboration?!

No guys but seriously, pick a school because it feels right for you, and for no other reason but that.