TRC Translation Notes Volume 11 (Chapters 74 - 82)
Here we are with the first installment of the new Translation Notes from @giniroangou, picking up exactly where she last paused at Chapter 74.
Highlights include: a return to Piffle, the restoration of Fai’s parenting skills, high school detectives becoming more competent, Nick appreciating Tomoyo in the distance, and general spousal vibes.
Chapter 74
p.2 - The chapter title that has been translated as “Your Power” I feel would be better rendered as “Your Strength.” The word “power” has some connotations in English that I don’t think are intended here.
p.7 - I don’t think this quite came through in the translation, but the banner here is worded like a general advertisement, so something in the vein of: “Leave it to us! Piffle Guard, for all your security needs.”
p.9 - The text by Kurogane that says “Angry guy” was originally just “Tsukkomi,” which I’ve covered before but can certainly be difficult to translate. It’s basically just indicating that his, “What the hell?!” is meant to be a comeback to hearing yet another ridiculous ship name.
Sakura’s “I can do better than this!” would be more accurately translated as, “I have to do my best too!” which I think gives a stronger sense of her drawing encouragement from the rest of her family and just has a more positive ring to it in general.
p.24 - The translation has Fai saying, “How could we ever doubt you, Sakura-chan,” which kind of gives the impression that they were doubting her at some point, but in the Japanese line he uses the word “sasuga,” meaning, “As expected of Sakura-chan.”
Chapter 75
p.33 - Kurogane’s line to Fai, “I told you not to slip alcohol to the kid and the princess,” was originally just, “I told you not to let the kid and the princess drink alcohol.” The Japanese version makes it sound less like Kurogane is accusing Fai of being a deliberately irresponsible parent.
p.35 - Kurogane’s “You little brat” is less harsh in the original text - he just says “kozou” (kid), as usual.
Fai’s “Daddy” nickname that has evoked so much hilarity and horror is “Otou-san” in Japanese. Not only is this more formal than the translation would indicate, it also doesn’t have the same kinky connotations as in English. That being said, there is a subtext here that I don’t necessarily think Fai intended but would definitely come across to Japanese readers. It’s quite common for married women with children to refer to their husbands regularly as “Otou-san,” so while Fai is probably just trying to needle Kurogane about his fatherly attitude towards the kids, he’s inadvertently giving off major spousal vibes at the same time.
p.36 - There are a couple little mistranslations in this conversation that make it sound more awkward in the English version. Kurogane doesn’t say that Sakura’s faster drunk than she is sober (as beautiful as that concept is) - he says that she got drunk faster than the last time (in Outo), which leads more naturally into Fai’s next lines where he theorizes that her happiness over her victory speeded up the process, and finishes by saying, “She really gave her best, after all.”
p.41 - In the translation Tomoyo says that the race was already being investigated for gambling issues. In the original, she says that the race was already the target of gambling, but she’d let it slide until now because it had caused very little damage.
p.43 - Kurogane doesn’t actually treat the “Daddy” nickname as a joke here - he just tells Fai to drop the subject. I wouldn’t have thought of it if it weren’t for the difference in translation, but I kind of love that he’s not actually denying that he’s the Team Dad. He just doesn’t want to hear about it.
Chapter 76
P.51 - The translation says that Shougo is a regular winner of the Dragonfly Race, but the original line just says that he’s a regular top-placer. We learn later that he won the previous year, but he didn’t necessarily place first on any other occasions. Who knows though.
Chapter 77
p.68 - Nokoru is not the Imonoyama Company owner’s eldest son, he’s the owner’s youngest brother.
p.69 - Shougo describes himself here as a “Guardian,” which quite rightfully raised a lot of questions. In the original text, the reading of the word he says is indeed given as “guardian” (ガーディアン), but the kanji below it reads “jikeidan” (自警団), meaning “vigilante corps.” Shougo declaring himself the member of the country’s vigilante corps makes a whole lot more sense given his earlier behavior.
When Shougo complains about Nokoru’s behavior, he’s not just referencing his treatment of Sakura - he says that every time they meet a female finalist Nokoru declares her innocent.
p.73 - A minor change that helps make sense of the flow of the scene here and everyone’s reactions: When Nokoru tells Sakura, “But of course you’re innocent,” his line would be better translated as, “I knew you were innocent,” or, “I see you were innocent after all,” so it indicates some kind of realization rather than just sounding like he’s repeating himself from earlier.
p.75 - This whole conversation is a little off in the translation, so to summarize from the original text: Sakura and Syaoran both registered as surprised but not panicked, indicating that they aren’t the culprits. Nokoru says that he has confidence in his device, though he can’t claim that it’s perfect - it’s still hard to discover lies told by people who have convinced themselves of their own fabrications OR by those who are truly wicked.
p.78 - You were critical of the choice to refer to the potential culprit as “he,” and I can assure you that this was purely a translation choice. It’s always good to keep in mind that Japanese is light on pronouns, so it’s very rare for anyone to specify gender in that fashion. I personally think it’s best to assume that all gendered pronouns in translations are merely inferred.
p.79 - Fai’s line about Syaoran’s face being tight is intended as an observation rather than a question, and of course is a direct reference back to their conversation in chapter 71. I don’t think I mentioned it last time and it may be clear enough from the drawings, but Fai appears to be referring not to Syaoran’s entire face but specifically his forehead scrunching up.
Chapter 78
p.89 - Sakura’s lines here are translated in a way that creates some unnecessary distance, IMO. In the translation she says, “If it was just one person alone, I’m sure it would have been awful, but… we’re all travelling together.” Her original lines are closer to, “If I were alone I’m sure it would have been difficult, but… we’re together.”
p.90 - When Sakura says, “I haven’t been much help to anyone yet,” your response was, “There better be a ‘but’ following this statement,” and I am happy to report that there is! Her Japanese line ends with “desukedo,” which is a common way to trail off at the end of a sentence and doesn’t necessarily serve as a rebuttal to her first thought, but it does allow room for disagreement.
p.92 - Inexplicably, the translation has Mokona saying that she thinks Yuuko is “really really” mad - there are no “really”s in the original.
p.93 - A clarifying point: Mokona tells Syaoran that certain countries have traditional White Day gifts rather than certain worlds. I don’t know anything about White Day traditions outside of Japan, but I do know that it’s celebrated in multiple Asian countries, so I assume this makes sense.
Chapter 79
p.111 - I don’t know if this is at all clear in the translated version, but the lines reading, “Isn’t that great,” are coming from Fai and Syaoran. They’re both saying, “That’s amazing,” Syaoran in a polite way and Fai in a casual way. I haven’t been pointing it out regularly, but it’s actually a fairly common occurrence for two or three of these characters to say the same line in slightly different ways, and it’s always a fun depiction of their different personalities and modes of expression.
p.112 - I can tell the translator tried to convey this through the word choice, but as a clarifying point, Tomoyo consistently speaks in a fashion that is both very feminine and very formal. In light of this, there’s a lot of humor in the scene where she asks Sakura to use casual language with her and claims that she’s already using her most comfortable speech style.
The translation has Fai comment on Sakura and Tomoyo’s “gentle eyes,” but his original line is that they’re “easy on the eyes.” In Japanese this saying is bit more literal - it doesn’t imply a level of attraction the way it does in English. He just means that they’re pleasant/soothing to watch.
Chapter 80
p.133-134 - The translation takes a more generous and group-oriented approach to Syaoran’s lines here, but I would interpret them on an individual level; “I have to get Sakura’s feather back, and to do that, I need to win.” The lack of pronouns in the original text means this is all up to personal interpretation, but that final panel of Syaoran zooming ahead of Sakura while she’s struggling feels like a depiction of his occasional single-minded focus on her feathers - to me it implies that he’s willing to do anything to reach that goal, even if it means abandoning her. Of course, I’m not saying he should have stayed behind to help her in this situation, but there is a bit of potential darkness to that scene that doesn’t quite come through in the translated version.
p.136 - Fun fact: the part of the course that includes buildings and billboards is referred to as the “public skyway” (一般空路.) I presume this means Piffle has regular air traffic outside of its racing events.
Chapter 81
P.157 - This becomes clear in the next chapter, but the line that’s been translated as, “There are only four badges left,” was actually, “There are still four contestants left,” indicating that the two flying behind Sakura are the last of the group and giving a clearer picture of her position in the overall race.
Chapter 82
No comments on this one - we’re ending on a high note!