#walker-journal

[beatrice-blaze]

[pm] Just so y'know, theres a girl from my synagogue whose can explode and Nell is going on magical Karate Kid with her. Welcome back Necro Houdini.

[pm] Oh, how I have missed receiving messages like this from you

How exactly do you mean explode? Is this about Bex the baby witch that Nell has decided to mother? 

Please change my contact name in your phone to Necro Houdini

[seizethecarpe]

[pm] So its looking like the local Paranormal Parts dealers aren't jumping for any of the Catfish stuff, I'll check the docks and see if we can get a buyer

[pm] Catfish? I could eat catfish. There’s so much of it. More than the seals.

I could eat you. Lots of high quality meat on you. Would keep me full for days

What the fuck

Sure, sure. 

There was something I was meant to tell you

What the fuck was it

Try Sebastian. Tall, wears his hair in a bun and has too much beard to be comfortable, but he knows his specialty fishes. Usually on the third pier.  I could eat sebastian too

[chasseurdeloup-retired]

[pm] Ok so Brah, dude bro dude. I Think i've figured it out! Like Beasthunterness! I might have cracked it

[pm] Cracked what? Please don’t say your skull. Should I be worried?

[3starsquinn]

[pm] [del] Aw shit how do I even say this? I killed your friend your don't want this from me fuuuuuuuuuck]. Hey man, jus sliding into your DMs to say that the whole virginity stigma for men is bullshit, and getting your dick wet or not doesn't make you any more or less of man. You're true, honorable, and do whatever it takes to follow what you think is right. That's the only true dudeness that actually matters. ----Peace, Adam

[pm] This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me 

Oh. Well that is very nice of you. Are we even talking? I haven’t talked to you in a very long time. I don’t even know if I like you anymore. I mean clearly I must or I wouldn’t be replying to this. I hate this.

Clearly this whole repressed virgin thing has made its rounds. I’d be flattered that so many people care about my public messages if I was already so mortified. But uh... thanks. I will take that grossly described but surprisingly nice message to heart. I uh... hope you’re doing okay? You haven’t murdered anyone else I know have you?

[stones-x-bones]

[pm]. Hey, I'm not gonna meddle in religious stuff. But like, just be careful out there in the witch fire forest stuff?

[pm] Adam, I’m still Jewish.

[mor-beck-more-problems]

[pm] Hey Proff, I've got a question about transmutation. Like on people. Specifically me the people.

@walker-journal

[pm] WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU THE PEOPLE ADAM SLFSDSDLJK

Adam, I’ll be honest with you. Human transmutation is usually just a great way to die a slow, painful death. Or fast, if you’re lucky.

Are you going to tell me why you want to transmute yourself? And in what capacity?

[laylacooke]

Hottest people in town?

Finally asking me questions that don’t pertain to my mental status or personal life? I’m impressed. But let’s see. Hottest people in town, just to please your sick and twisted little fantasy...

@offrankies will always be my number one, and if you think that’s ever going to change, you’re shitting yourself.

@letsbenditlikebennett We did kiss after all, and I only kiss people that I think are hot.

@walker-journal He’s an asshole, but he can be sweet in his own perverted way I guess.

@harlowhaunted She’s kinda hot when she’s angry.

@3starsquinn He’s got that adorkable sort of thing going. Plus, he did save me those two times, I guess.

@caraitaliadolcemeta No comment.

@chasseurdeloup He’s kinda hot, even though he’s bitter and old as fuck.

@grahamstoker Another asshole, but not bad to look at.

@corpse--diem Kinda hot, even though she’s straight up Tales from the Crypt.

@deathduty She’s a little out there, but why not? She’d be even hotter if she could get my name right.

[letsbenditlikebennett]

[pm]. Hey um, not sure how to ask this. But would it be possible for you to put me in contact with the other wolf, golden eyed one. I promise I'm not trying to start shit, I just...wanna talk I guess.

[pm] That’s not really something I’m able to do. Not because I don’t trust you, but mostly because I can guarantee that would ruin any sense of truce I was able to establish with them. We did talk though and I was promised she would not go after you again unless you came for her. What did you want to talk to her about? I can try to mediate as best I can, but I didn’t even know here real name for the longest time so I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t be groovy with me giving out her contact information.