#we..really aught to get rid of that ghost..

[askcrimsonchalice]

[Aqua] "Hello there! Having a business must be exhausting, what is some items that you send out that takes the most work? Also how have you been open for?"

( @theblindfoldedprince)

[recurring-polynya]

Renji Fashion Roundup pII

A while ago, I got asked to rank Renji’s fashion choices, and I already did Part I: Canon. It’s Renji’s Birthday (Aug 31), so here’s Part II: Anime Filler. There will also be a Part III: Openings and Endings, which contains the most cursed thing I’ve ever seen.

11. The “Mummy” outfit from the Halloween episode. It’s not even really fair to classify this as a “fashion choice,” the man is allegedly grievously injured and covered in bandages (which he uses as a weapon). I think he might have his hair in a ponytail and then taped down to his head, otherwise it’s way too short. The loincloth, tho, is mysterious, there is no reason he shouldn’t be wearing pants in this scenario.

10a and b. We all knew the hippy outfit from the Bount arc was going to be on here, but did you know he actually has two entirely separate hippy outfits? First off, let’s talk about the classic one. He has a terrible bucket hat, which he wears initially, and he carries around a guitar I assume he can’t play, like Howl from Howl’s Moving Castle. Let the record show that Ichigo’s teacher was into this look. Anyway, he got rid of the hat almost immediately and affected a pretty decent bandana, so points for that. The second hippy outfit comes from the Sealed Sword Frenzy OAV, which is tremendous, everyone should watch it (just search Sealed Sword Frenzy on YouTube). The bandana is worse, he has his wallet on a chain, he’s got some hemp bracelets, it’s bad. He stands up at some point and his pants are pulled up just way too high, but I blame the animators for that. Anyway, in case you couldn’t have guessed from the Chappy shirt, Rukia picked out this outfit. “I put him in it,” she states, ominously. Anyway, I love the Chappy shirt and he might as well go all in on those bracelets, play some hackysack, listen to some Phish, I give a slight edge to this version.

9. The Lamp Society Episode is the purest of all filler episodes. Renji’s-- excuse me, Ren Jin’s outfit is a disaster, but so is everyone else’s. I initially rated it low and then I said, you know, this thing really shows off his ab tatts, and his accessory game is on point (turban-esque headband, chunky bracelet and do not sleep on those pointy shoes). The puffed sleeves are Not Good and the pants are too big (but somehow not as big as Rukia’s???) Anyway, I think this outfit was supposed to be terrible, but the more I look at it, the more I think he’s really making this work.

8. Cop Renji. This is also from Sealed Sword Frenzy. He shows up at Ichigo’s house like this, carrying a shotgun, which he continues to use throughout the episode for some reason. Anyway, I am pretty sure this is not what cops wear in Japan, maybe he just watched the Untouchables? Anyway, by all rights, he should look awesome in a three-piece suit and he just...doesn’t. I think it’s the hair. Maybe also the sheriff’s star.

7. The Beach episode. Renji’s beach gear is...fine. I mean, a white tank top is a good, clean look for him, shows off his ink well. His trunks have ghost flames on them and...eh. I know, I lived through the early aughts, too, Renji. I am sorry I had to use the picture of Ikkaku’s butt, it was the only full-body shot I could find. Eh. I just feel like we deserved better. To that end, I have included a picture of the part where Yoruichi throws a dead shark on him. This episode is a disaster.

6. Reigei Arc BBQ. Renji has a different outfit he wears during most of the Reigei Arc, but they have a BBQ, and he gets dressed up for it. I am not really here for that satin jacket, he’s trying too hard, does it have 3/4 sleeves? Good footwear, though. Also, I cannot emphasize enough that he gets points for trying, unlike Ikkaku and Shuuhei, who look like they just got out of detention. Omaeda looks a lot like my boss here, and I don’t like it. Also, I need to stop looking at this picture, because I keep imagining Renji doing the clicky “just testing the tongs!” thing that you know you do, too.

5. So here’s the outfit he wears during the rest of the Reigei arc, and honestly, it’s pretty good. Most of his outfits are just variations on this. This is Classic Living World Renji, I guess. The pants fit more or less well depending on how the animators were feeling that day (note how many people in this shot have their hands in their pockets). Could do better on the bandana front, this is just laziness. This outfit would be rated higher, except that he’s wearing white shoes, what the junk, Renji? If you’re wearing a leather jacket, it is surely after Labor Day. Speaking of leather jackets, I am almost certain that Byakuya has an identical one in one of the closing themes and I can never decide if they have matching leather jackets, or if they just share, it’s not like B heads out to the World of the Living all that often. It’s actually kinda short on Renji, which points toward the latter, but I am so charmed by Byakuya being like “Renji, I have bought us jackets” and Renji goes just total star eyes and everyone else is just like “oh God, why is Squad 6 like this?”

4. At first, I actually thought he had three hippy outfits, but this is just what people wore in the mid-aughts, and that probably says something. Anyway, this is just, like, the warm weather version of the previous outfit. It has a better bandana and some good boots. Also, we get to see his arms. That vest is Really Something and once again, he has his wallet on a chain, but I think it still edges out those white shoes by a hair.

3. Ahh, now we are into the stuff that’s actually good. This is Renji’s New Year’s outfit, which he wears in both of the New Year’s episodes, and I think is a nice bit of consistency. I like it when he does a full-coverage bandana, and he’s got a  subtle earth-tones color scheme going on. He cleans up nice.

2. Look. LOOK. I always thought the cake episode was my favorite episode, but it’s not, it’s the one where Renji Makes a Movie. What you have to additionally appreciate is that this is not an outfit Renji put on to direct a movie, this is an outfit that Renji put on to portray himself directing a movie. He’s got some sweet aviators and he’s just thrown a bomber jacket on overtop his shihakusou. It’s terrible and I can’t get enough of it. I took a million screenshots from this ep and they are all the same. Also, he just exudes confidence this whole episode. Not his usually, overblown, “I’m infinity times stronger than you” fight hype. Nope, he’s just a fictionalized version of himself, telling Byakuya what to do, helping Rukia live out her Maid Cop dreams, humiliating Ichigo (who may actually die in this episode? the end is ambiguous). Another thing that’s ambiguous about this episode is whether there was ever a film festival to begin with, or if that’s just part of the conceit of Renji’s film. I like to think it’s the second, which implies that Iba put on a dog suit and Hisagi pretended to use a laptop because they wanted to help Renji live out his filmmaking dreams. Anyway, this episode is the Infinite Jest of Bleach, Rukia is Renji’s Madame Psychosis, Squad 6 is the Enfield Tennis Academy, I am going to stop now, nobody wants this.

 1. Holy smokes, Renji can really wear a pirate outfit. I was not expecting this. I had a spreadsheet of episodes I needed to look up, and I was like, Halloween episode, yeah, yeah--oh shit. The coat, the boots, the tricorn. I was utterly blindsided by how incredibly hot he looks here. I am pretty sure his hair situation is physically untenable, I don’t care. Even his weird anthropomorphic pineapple crew couldn’t dissuade me. I am mad that it was colored with dream sequence lighting so my screenshots are potato quality, this flashback is amazing, you should go watch it yourself (it’s episode 304). The upshot of this is where is my goddamn RenRuki Poldark AU, already?

I want to point out that I learned some stuff doing this, namely that Renji’s fashion sense isn’t actually that bad. Mostly, he likes to layer, and he owns a lot of jackets. Big same, my man. He wears a lot of purple, but I think it works for him. Also, a big fan of necklaces? So many necklaces. Regardless, in almost every one of these episodes, there was someone (usually Ichigo, often Chad), in something Much Worse. I think Renji just exudes bad fashion energy, leaving you with the vague memory that he can’t dress himself, when in fact, he’s basically fine, at least as far as actual episodes of Bleach go. Openings and endings are an entirely different story. Tune in next time.