#weight restoring

[breakfastattheglitterfactory]

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Trying not to cry (and feeling ridiculous for my emotional status right now) because I just cannot see myself going through the “weight restoration” process yet again

[may-fl0wers]

this is very unexpected and totally fab news but i just got my period! first period in five (nearly six) months and i'm so so happy i think the combination of partial weight restoration plus taking my iron tablets to get my anaemia under control has meant my body has decided it's time for it to come back it's slightly difficult too- early on in my ed my brain decided that it was a sign that i was still too fat if i was getting my period- and it's compounding the issues i'm currently having with body image in restoration but i'm just trying to focus instead on the fact that now i can actually have kids one day

[activecookie]

intake 22.12.13

B: overnight oats, one pice of self-made egg nog cake

L: salad, pasta dish with cabbage (special austrian dish)

S: christmas cookies loads

D: a brown roll (big one, 250g), sheep cheese, salad, ham

S: loads of christmas cookies again (I love them and they are so calorie dense --> so good to gain quickly!)

what do you think? maybe I will drink a fortisip before bed time?

[activecookie]

bad body image

such abad body image day today….I just feel fat and bloated and I am still concerned because I always eat and snack so much in the evening……the main part of my mind knows that my body just gets back what it needs and that once I am back to "normal" this might probably stop…but a small part still says "NO you are eating like a *** and you do not need this"…...

I just have to shut up this voice…as my body already shows me the warning signs…and I want to get better for so many reasons….it is just soooo hard….especially if you are completely on my own….

but I am going back home to see my family in 3 weeks <3 getting loads of home cooked food..the christmas cookies my mum makes etc etc….I will not care about eating/calories/ whatever as long as I am home I will enjoy the time with my family and eat whatever they eat! AND ENJOY IT :) I NEED IT I KNOW IT...

sry about ranting :( I am just little bit down today…. also because of the chilblains on my fingers…and no doctor seems to really care about anything here…and I cannot get an appointment earlier than 2 weeks time… -.- WTF?

[activecookie]

yeyy again a little weight gain :) no wonder after so much fooood

[activecookie]

Yesterday I was out for dinner with my girls!! we went to a very posh restaurant :) I was afraid first but then I ordered a 200g steak with herb butter and a big tomato mozzarella side salad :) and I ate all the complementary chiabatta and olive bread with butter which was soooo good :P FU ED :P

[activecookie]

yeah

having increased my intake to about 3000cal since last weekend I have to say:

i feel much more energized

my skin already looks better :o

i feel bloated all the time and my belly sticks out but I have to ignore it…my body will sort it out by himself once it is weight restored

FIGHT FOR RECOvERY!

[activecookie]

progress

It is funny but scary too how a year ago I could not even eat anything for breakfast (I just refused to do so) and now I feel hungry at 4 in the morning looking forward to my big 400g of overnight oats with banana and apple etc :D