BLOGTOBER 10/9/2022: THE HIDDEN (1987)
I'm gonna say something contentious about this great movie, to my own detriment, but I think it's the truth: Boys love THE HIDDEN. I mean, I also love THE HIDDEN. Everybody who loves a good movie loves THE HIDDEN! It's a huge party with great performances, cool images, and non-stop action. Bitchin' car chases, sick guitar riffs, sci-fi weapons, fucked up parasites, and gun-toting strippers are not inherently gendered fare; they are for everyone. But I think that the way I watch THE HIDDEN is fundamentally different from the way that, say, my husband watches it. He grew up in the New Jersey suburbs in the '80s and '90s, raised with a sense that his natural, god-given culture was cool cars, hot chicks, shootouts, explosions, secret agents, alien invaders, and all this macho material that blasts out of the screen when you watch THE HIDDEN. When my husband and I watch this movie, we may experience a similar level of pleasure, but not for the same reasons. He sees a great movie, but he also sees the greatest expression of what he was raised to believe is an inherent part of his being. He gets a sense of ownership, a feeling of having his own true nature acknowledged, that I can't really touch as a cis het girl who was raised as such—and I've noticed this every time I watch THE HIDDEN with the dudes in my life. They get a sense of social patriotism from it, a feeling of unity, and an affirmation of the most basic tenants of their cultural identity. And I think that's totally great.
So anyway, THE HIDDEN is the best movie by director Jack Sholder, unless you understand that WISHMASTER 2 is the greatest movie ever made, or unless you are doing contrarian hot takes on the quality of NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 2 just to point out that it's not as bad as its homophobic haters insist that it is. Without knowing for sure, I'd bet it's also the best movie from Bob Hunt, who also wrote THE BOOGENS. THE HIDDEN is a buddy cop movie in which hardboiled cop Michael Nouri and obvious space alien Kyle MacLachlachlan and hunt an intergalactic parasite with a taste for fast cars, rock'n'roll, and ultraviolence. It resembles ELM STREET 2 in its focus on male bonding and male fears around bodily vulnerability. It resembles WISHMASTER 2 in being an uninhibited, imaginative, balls to the wall good time. THE HIDDEN is fun, funny, and oddly moving, and it's basically only going to put you off if you hate joy.
It's easy to be distracted by the high octane spectacle of this movie, but it is also beautifully cast and performed. Kyle MacLachlan is typically wonderful and he has great chemistry with Michael Nouri, but the parasite also gives us a string of great performances from its hosts. My personal favorite is William Boyett, a lantern-jawed square who usually showed up in movies and shows about cops, cowboys, spies, and other GI Joe types, and his straight-laced appearance is a perfect foil for the extreme antisociality of the parasite, who totes around a boombox blasting shedding rock music on its relentless crime spree. Other standouts include Twin Peaks alum Chris Mulkey, Claudia Christian from MANIAC COP 2, and last but not least, Jake the dog from NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4.
I don't really have anything deep to say about THE HIDDEN besides the sociological observation that I led with. But, even though I maintain that it offers a delightful and, all things considered, not particularly toxic reflection of American masculinity, I should underline that THE HIDDEN is definitely for everyone. Watch it today to turn off your brain and boost your mood.
PS Here is my husband's hilarious photo of us watching THE HIDDEN on my laptop during our recent road trip. It really says how we feel about William Boyett.
