old shatterhand really is one of the characters of all time. one of his favorite activities is pretending he's not old shatterhand. he out-mary-sues most mary sues. when he was a teenager his nickname was "sappho". he canonically has pretty hands and doesn't care about the REAL MEN EAT ROCKS NEVER WASH AND ARE GIGANTIC gender norms. when he goes on an adventure he brings glasses and a telescope and a sewing kit (somehow all in his pockets) with him. he is the "we're selling giving you away to some Famous People without asking you! have fun!" trope. also the "goes to a new place and the Coolest Guy Ever immediately falls in love with him" trope. he's literally so in love with his best friend that they canonically don't even have to be in the same place and they'll still act in harmony with each other, and he forgets not everyone can read said friend's mind. also before they actually became friends the other guy tried to kill him many times but that still didn't stop OS from thinking about him lovingly 90% of the time. whenever somebody is making fun of him in a skillful way he goes "i like this guy :)". he pretends to not be himself so often that other people should at this point just assume that if something looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, swims like a duck and smells like a duck, it's probably old shatterhand dressed as a duck. when he was a teen he wrote a poem that was so good all his friends learned it by heart and years later he is still meeting random people who know it somehow. he's the most annoying celebrity ever. he goes to Very Dangerous places to search for cool plants and stones and bugs.
these books have so many many flaws but sometimes i want to study this guy under a microscope like a bug














