#writinglane

[writing-lane]

Like the seasons

I believe that what has now died will

Become green again

[writing-lane]

I CARRY A WOUND

of being left behind

forgotten at the store

overlooked, or simply a bore

it rips open when you stop holding me

but you can see it without knowing me

it’s buried in confidence, in

I didn’t want this anyway

funny thing is, the ones I should let leave

watch as I rip it open, so they can see fear bleed out of me

it stems from my hips to my thighs

held together with clenched teeth

arms wrapped around my sides

but it festers when you look in my eyes

it formed long ago, when it made no difference

how hard that little girl cried

it scarred over time, but tears in the same spot

one day it will ruin me, not the cut but

death by a thousand goodbyes.

[writing-lane]

You think I’m all smiles

Hot tea and baths

You think I’m always good

A stranger to wrath

You think I’m soft and careful

Never harsh or rash

You think I’m patient and safe

And walk the right path

But what if I’m not

What if my head is hotter than my baths

What if I’m best friends with wrath

What if my tongue is biting

And who I am is just hiding.

[writing-lane]

I wrote this on my 26th birthday.

[writing-lane]

[writing-lane]

I wanted to be wanted

When you had all the time in the world

I wanted to be missed

When I stood scantily in your kitchen

I wanted to be ravaged

When I laid in your bed waiting

I wanted to be fought for

When I stood on front lines

I wanted to be yours

When I called you mine

I wanted to be irresistible

I wanted to be undeniable

I wanted to be unmatched

I wanted to be unquestioned

I wanted to be

Irrefutably

Unequivocally

Yours

[writing-lane]

TO ALL THAT HAVE TOUCHED MY BODY

did you know that your hands

were caked with ink and coal

that your palms left marks behind

and became embedded in my soul

did you know that every caress

every slap and every kiss

lingered long after I'd ever admit

that your hands on me were missed

did you know you entered my world

became a character and a setting

both prologue and epilogue

one I'm incapable of forgetting

did you know I wanted you to stay

I wanted to be remembered

bad enough I was ok with

not being treasured.

[writing-lane]