#wtfdreams

[myunspokendarkness]

Pretty sure I traumatized myself with a vivid dream, literally the worst nightmare of my life and that after dreaming of being shot repeatedly and feeling a lot of pain 🙃

[randomdreamsthatmakenosense1666]

I had a dream i was driving in a car and turned onto our street. Jeffree star is then standing on the foot path i start screaming and i get out the car. I then go “Jeffree fucking star”. We then hug. we then go walk to his house he’s just bought and we start talking. I say “i was just watching you meeting fans on youtube earlier and thought that will never happen to me”. He then replies with “you’re fucking with me right”. I then say “no I’m not fucking with you” I then say I’m going to go up to my house to go get my phone so i can take a picture. I walk in to the house, pick up my phone and wake p up coz shes on my floor asleep and i say “Jeffree star is out the front. I run out my room and mum says “ur not seriously taking a photo in that”. I get changed then run outside where it is already night time. I look around for jeffree but i cant find him. Mum then grabs me and takes me to an eating disorder clinic where we are sitting at a table and there is a bowl of avocado in front of me. Mum then hugs me and leaves. I start screaming and crying my eyes out saying “no, I’m fine, I don’t have an eating disorder, let me go home, i cant be without my mum, don’t leave me here”. I look down into the avocados snd just cry my eyes out.

[myunspokendarkness]

Just had several dreams I attempted to kill myself...

[randomdreamsthatmakenosense1666]

I had a dream that I was in an eating disorder treatment centre and was being force fed. No doctor had come in to check on me in a while and I really needed to pee. I pulled out the Food tube and went to the toilet. I threw up then peed. I walked out the toilet and washed my hands. I then looked up at my body in the mirror. My jawline was sharp, my collarbones were super prominent and my eyes were dark and sad. I looked down at my wrists and they were so tiny. I looked up at the mirror again and whispered to myself “wow I’m sooo skinny”. The clinic was connected to a university so people being treated in the clinic could do their uni. It was mostly an arts uni and there was a drama auditorium that looked the same as the one at my school. I then walked out the toilet but couldn’t find my way back to my room. I turned the wrong way out of the toilet and ended up in the uni. I ran through the drama auditorium and went out the back. My ward was grouped there and the nurses were trying to find me. They see me then grab me and I’m screaming trying to get away. They then sedate me and I wake up again in the ward.

[randomdreamsthatmakenosense1666]

I had a dream I was in the city. Everyone was angry and me and I had to hide. I was getting on a bus when I see my cousin. He’s chasing after me and we get on the bus together. I don’t have any money for the bus so I pretend to scan my smartrider. The driver goes “are you sure that worked young lady?” And I was like “yea” I then connect to a wifi and tell mum to pick me up from L shops. I manage to jump off the bus and my plan was to run and lock myself in the girls toilet in the shopping centre. He had noticed I got off though and followed me. I am then transported to school. I run in the hallway and into mums old office. I lock the door and start crying. I ask another of my mums colleagues where my mum is. She doesn’t know and everyones getting ready to leave. Mum then runs through the door and I run up to her crying and give her a hug. I tell her someone is following me and we need to get home and lock the doors. I am then transported to a strange house. It has lots of sick kids there with bandages around their heads with most their bones exposed with no skin. I then was grabbed by a women who was about 20 and she grabbed two other kids. We went into a room and there was a dude masterbating to porn on a laptop. I saw his entire dick but he didn’t notice us. We ran out of that room and we went into another room. I kept looking around making sure no one here that was my cousin trey. She hid us under a bed and told the headmistress of this orphanage that she would take care of us three. It was extremely compact under this bed and I would be stuck there for 2 weeks with no food or water. The 20 year old did sneak water for us to drink and spilt some on us to cool us down.

[myunspokendarkness]

I had a dream that a microscopic spider got into my liver and game me cancer and type one diabetes...

[auroramoon-draws16]

Okay so dreams

So I had a dream yesterday about theoddoneout at a concert with someone on stage that he knows so they talk on Twitter then suddenly I’m with my brother binge watching my hero academia even though I’ve never seen the show but then it cuts to the princes and princesses of Disney at a slumber party and Aladdin says “I can eat palm leaves” stops and behind him three more Aladdins fly in on flying carpets finishing it with “by myself” then just stops at Repunzel with a confused look on her face and ends because I woke up laughing completely confused of what just happened wtf

[notawordtome]

100% Hope This Dream Isn’t Real

I’ve had so many crazy dreams that I don’t know which are real and which are fake anymore.  One I had last night may be partially real...or at least partially “I told you so”.

So, I was dreaming that I was married and trying for children (which is true in real life) and as I was going about my business, I noticed my period had started again.  Again, this ties into real life.  We’ve been trying for kids off and on for a month or two with no success.  Anyway, I find myself disappointed by the news and I want to tell someone.

I mention this to a friend in my dream who tells me, “Well of course you aren’t pregnant.  You’re married to Hudson (guy I did my most recent show with).”

At first, this wasn’t a surprise.  My mind thought, “Of course you’re married to him,” because it was that part of the dream cycle where everything seems believable.  A short pause later, it dawned on me that he was NOT my husband.  It was only a dream.

My brain is an asshole sometimes.  It likes to play with “what if” scenarios and picture myself with other men.  This has happened for years, so I’m used to it.

HOWEVER. I’m not usually married to men in my dreams.  It’s only happened twice before where I was able to see the face of the man I was married to: once for a theatre buddy (who I begrudgingly married in the dream), and once to Florizel (happily married!).  

Hudson was a happy marriage, or so it seemed in the moment.  It would make sense, as we played a loving couple in the show we did, and have become friends since then.  I admitted to Florizel that I had a “what if” moment where I imagined another outcome.  Hudson and I could have met during another show, one where I could have met Florizel as well.

It makes me wonder: did God have something to do with that in another way?  I always thought it was because my faith wasn’t ready for Florizel, so He opened another door for me at another theatre.  

Now I look at it and think, “Could I have met Hudson sooner and maybe formed a relationship with him instead of Florizel?”  It’s a sobering thought!  To be fair, Hudson and I have a lot in common, but we don’t have the same connection that my husband and I do.

I’m perfectly content with Florizel and was relieved to wake up next to him this morning.  He is my love and my everything.  I look back and realize the path I was on was the one I needed.  It wasn’t always happy or perfect, but it taught me everything I needed to know and opened the right doors for me.

We are sent into each others’ lives for reasons unknown to us.  It’s gratifying to look back at the path we took and rejoice in the journey, not just the end.  I thank God every day for everything that lead me to where I am now and rejoice in His blessings on our lives.

Thank you for everything.  I would not be who I am today without this journey, this journey meant only for me.  It has been a long one, 30 years strong, but satisfying and joyful.  I’m thankful for every person you’ve placed there, no matter how long or short their stay, and for the lessons they’ve taught.

Thank you for the saints in my life and allowing me to be saints in the lives of others.  Just...thank you.  I realize every moment is important and I cherish them all.  Let me have many more of them and let me teach the importance of these moments to my children.  I am so grateful to have a God as amazing and wonderful as you are.

Amen.

Work calls.