lean on me.
-> “It was the best Christmas present you could ever wish for – it was truly a miracle in December.”
Genre: xmas!au, university!au, classmates to lovers!au ; lots and lots of fluff™
Pairing: soft!seungmin x lonely!reader
Word count: 7.5K
Summary: Things take a turn for you when you decide to confess to your crush on the day of the first snow.
Warnings: fluff, heartwarming, a few swear words
Author’s Notes:
it’s finally Christmas !! go ahead and make yourself a warm cup of hot chocolate and grab a bunch of snacks… but no cheese, we already have plenty for you :))
I don’t think you’ll cry from this, so no need for tissues >______< (unless you’re sick… in that case i feel ya T^T) we tried rlly hard not to make it angst, we rlly did
I recommend this for cold/rainy days, so you can have something to read while you’re bored and all that.
*fun fact, we started this before bots, our last fic; it might be rlly similar bc of the group project aspect but yeh this was a last minute fic that we managed to pump out (blu)
^^YES “LAST MINUTE” INDEED i pulled an all-nighter for this bc being the clowns we are, we remembered about it on cHRISTMAS EVE AND WROTE IT IN A DAY. (struz)
OKAY SRY FOR THE LONG A/N
Happy reading! - blu n’ struz
@okayseungmin this is for you :’) the collab didn’t happen, but hoping you’re enjoying your christmas !!
tuesday.
“Isn’t it uncanny that out of all the colors, Tolstoy chose to make this vase red?! This is, my young swines, no coincidence! Not only does the color red represent war and bloodlust, but it’s also the same color as the flower of love, the rose, which symbolizes the bittersweet relationship between him and the republic…” “Hey, Heejin. You aren’t busy this week, right?” Leaning back in his seat, Mingyu set his pencil down on his notepad, which was brighter than his future.
“Nah,” Heejin didn’t look up from the anime girl she was sketching instead of taking notes, but her curious grin told him she was listening.
“Let’s go watch that new movie. Tomorrow at 5?” She smiled down at her paper. “I’ll be waiting.”
The holidays were nearing: the season of good tidings, gift-giving, and above all, love. All around the room, romance was budding; dates were planned, confessions were made… and there was you.
You’d never been on a date before.
You’d never been asked out, nor asked anyone out.
And you tell yourself you’d rather keep it that way, at least until you were done with school.
I’d be shooting myself in the foot if I got into a relationship now, anyways. If I don’t focus on studying, I won’t find a good job, then I’d be out on the streets begging. Where would my love get me then?
Resolutely, you willed your aching wrist and cramping fingers to endure the pain. Just a little while longer, the clock promised, just 15 more minutes to go. 15 minutes of Brandonbury could be 15 minutes of sleep or 15 minutes of Youtube, but you continued to scribble furiously.
There was a tap at your shoulder. You turned to see Yuqi’s face flushed tomato red. In her hand was a piece of notebook paper folded in the shape of a heart.
“Hey, y/n… could you please pass this to Shuhua? Ohmygosh I’m freaking out.”
You covered your irritation with a forced smile. “Sure, good luck.” You reached over to take the heart from her, but she wouldn’t let it go.
“Ugh, wait, I’m totally gonna get rejected. Should I give it or not?! Is a heart too much?! Should I be more inconspicuous?! I can’t do this! Y/n, what do I do?!” Yuqi grabbed your wrists and shook you hysterically.
Well, I don’t blame her for being nervous. The girl’s practically a goddess. Can’t help her there. You were at a loss for words, but luckily, you were saved by the bell.
Brring!
“Oh, dammit! Now it’s too late,” she wailed in distress and buried her face in her hands. Suddenly, she shot to her feet with determination blazing in her eyes.
“Screw it,” she muttered and walked straight up to Shuhua, bowed, and presented the paper heart.
“Shuhua…! W-would you please go with– ack. Uhm… would you please go out with me...?”
Shuhua glanced up, took the heart and looked over it, then shrugged. “Sure.”
Yuqi.exe has stopped working, you thought to yourself, seeing the girl gape in bewilderment. Must be nice to be in love. You whipped your backpack over your shoulder and cleared the hall.
–––––
It was a chilly December afternoon; the sun refused to show itself at all today.
Even though class was over, you had a day of melancholy awaiting you— no, even melancholic; it was downright depressing. Before you could retire to the sanctuary of your bed, you had to complete the notes from the earlier lecture and organize a study guide so you wouldn’t get your unintelligent ass kicked by semester finals. Unlike most universities, yours had finals after winter break.
You scanned your closet for the fluffiest winter wear you owned and piled on layer after layer, ran to the kitchen and quickly made yourself a strong cup of black coffee, making sure to snatch an unhealthy dose of the salted shortbread chocolate chip cookies you’d baked yesterday before crawling back into the warm embrace of your blankets.
Unzipping your backpack, you pulled out your notebook and your laptop, which you turned on as you criss-crossed your legs to warm your feet, which were still ice-cold despite the thick woolen socks you had on.
It was days like this that made you feel especially sad and lonely. Beyond the little balcony of your compact apartment, the streets were lined with Christmas decorations and people out and about, being merry. In stark contrast, the world inside was silent and monotone.
“December 14th,” you sighed, leaning back into your pillow. You were tired from making up lecture notes from the lesson, and you were more than ready for break to start. In addition to the suffocating ennui in your room, you felt so empty knowing that your big brother wouldn’t be back for Christmas.
Almost there, you thought. Only a couple more days, and you’d be out of Brandonbury’s loathsome literature class. So far in the year, the class was chill enough, nothing you couldn’t handle.
In fact, you were starting to wonder if the sophomores were pulling the freshies’ leg when they claimed his class was “hell.”
“Maybe they were talking about how tedious the class is. True, I’d rather blow my brains out than listen to him drone on about the color wheel of emotions.”
With a huff, you shut your laptop after you finished transferring your notes to a doc.
Time for a well-deserved break~ you thought, despite having really done nothing.
You reached for your phone and instinctively opened your chat with your best friend, Ryujin. Although she hadn’t taken that Myers-Briggs personality type test, you were sure she was an ESFJ-T. She would always help you sort out your life problems (though she was a little crazy on the inside too) – the most recent being one you’d been contemplating for the past year.
[you] jinnie
[ryujinnie💖] wassup
[you] can we talk
[you] well… remember how i told u i was gonna confess to joshua
[ryujinnie💖] uh huh… no way you’re not?!!
[you] this is going to hurt but i feel like i need to let go of this breath i’ve been holding before this year ends
[you] class ended alr, i’m waiting at home
[you] what do u want for dinner i can order chicken
[you] hello?
[ryujinnie💖] sis i’m driving call??
[you] its fine just keep your eyes on the road, you traffic hazard
[you] ttyl :pp
---------
You and Ryujin sat legs crossed, side by side on the carpet.
“Heater turned up?” she asked. “Check,” you replied, checking to make sure that it was on.
“Food?”
“Check,” you answered between bites of fried chicken.
“Netflix?”
“Eh… still browsing the catalog.” You clicked through show after show, occasionally pausing to watch previews.
“Just choose something,” Ryujin said, not looking up from her fries. “It’s not that hard.”
You were sure it wasn’t just you this time. Sure, you were pretty indecisive, but Netflix was really running out of good things to watch.
Your patience was wearing thin, and besides, you didn’t call Ryujin over to watch a movie. Giving up, you decided to just put on some Christmas music from YouTube.
Turning to the food, you found that a third of the chicken had vanished. You were about to nag her on her food hogging habits, but bit your tongue. You had more important things to talk about.
“Ryujin,” you started seriously.
“Mmmhf?” She looked up at you as she took a gargantuan bite out of her second drumstick.
“So… should I confess? People are asking people out left and right and everyone is going out with someone.”
“I say go ahead. I don’t wanna push you out of your comfort zone or anything, but if getting a definite answer is what you’re looking for, then just confess.”
“But what if I get rejected? His friends are so intimidating, and he probably has a long list of admirers already… I wouldn’t even make the waiting list! Have you seen the girls that talk to him?! Most are from business or fashion, and they all look like they just came back from a Vogue shoot.”
You flopped onto your back, not knowing how to deal with the conflicting concerns that were eating you up.
“Well, you never know, right? You know there’s always people out there whose lives seem like they’re straight out of some 3-star cliche romance drama.” Ryujin shrugged.
“And that’s not me.” You blew aside a strand of hair.
“Why do you have to be so difficult, y/n?! I’m not you, so I can’t help you unless you help yourself,” your best friend said, sipping her soft drink. “Now sit up and put on a movie.”
Groaning, you sat up and flipped your hair back.
“Hey, grab me a napkin.” Ryujin waggled her greasy fingers in your direction.
Sighing, you gave her the whole stack and grabbed a miserable french fry, soggy and cold. You nibbled it mindlessly, trying to sort out your thoughts.
“I doubt that Joshua dude is worth my bestie getting so depressed over,” Ryujin said, holding one chicken leg in each hand and brandishing them like they were swords. “Imma fight him if he rejects you. Don’t worry, I got your back.”
“Aw, what would I ever do without you?” You grinned, then attacked the food like a temerarious pterodactyl.
“That’s my girl.” Ryunjin chuckled proudly, then grabbed the remote to turn on a movie. “Let’s see... shall we watch a rom-com? No, let’s watch a horror movie! I heard this one was really good…”
Her words went through one ear and exited the other. In all honesty, you didn’t really have an appetite. Even your favorite food, fried chicken, looked bland to you when the only thing that was on your mind was how you were going to confess.
wednesday.
The anxiety made your stomach churn and your cheeks flush. You rubbed your hands together as if you were starting a fire as you nervously paced back and forth outside the dreaded café.
Mia’s Café: a warm little shop that perplexingly brought together over half the couples on campus despite its radically overpriced coffee.
Being the creeper (aw man) you were, you knew that Joshua, sometimes accompanied by his friends, came to this very shop at this time every day, and for this reason, you deliberately skipped Brandonbury’s class to come here.
You were in awe of your own rebelliousness. In all your 19 years, never had you ever done something so scandalous. From second grade up until today, you’d always had perfect attendance. (In first grade, you were declared a safety hazard to the school after contracting the stomach flu and projectile vomiting onto your teacher’s clothes.)
However, the confession had to be today. It was the day of the first snow. You wouldn’t call yourself superstitious, but you desperately wanted to believe that your love would come true on this magical day.
Whatever. Screw this, you thought. Not like I’m going to die or anything. Just go in and say it. It’s really simple. Why are you even freaking out?
Although you tried to boost your own confidence with a pep talk, it never worked because you knew all too well that it was much more complicated than that. While you suffered an internal crisis on deciding whether to enter the shop, Joshua already opened the door and was walking out with his friends.
You winced as he made eye contact with you, giving you a brief nod. He turned to leave, but a squeaky voice stopped him in his tracks.
“Hey, Joshua.” You managed to say. “C-can I ask you something?”
“Sure,” he smiled, then nodded at his friends. “You guys go ahead first.”
You waited as they filed out the door, heart hammering in your chest. There were a thousand butterflies in your stomach, and you were pretty sure they were poisonous.
“So, what were you gonna say?” he looked over expectantly, and you met his cool gaze.
Asdhfhdsfhk, sh*t!! How is it legal to be this hot?! You flushed, then cleared your throat. It’s fine. Just open your mouth and say something, you clown.
“Well… I was wondering– the thing is,” you stammered. What am I even saying?! Just say it how it is.
“The thing is…! I like you, Joshua. I like you a lot. I like the way you hold the door open for strangers, how you give everyone a chance to say what’s on their mind, and how you look when you ruffle your hand through your hair. If you’re not seeing anyone right now… would you please consider seeing me?”
You felt like a trademark SoundCloud rapper with how fast you were talking, but now you could breathe easy. There. I said it!
Joshua blinked as if he hadn’t completely processed what you’d say. Or… rather, he looked as if he wasn’t sure how to respond. You stared down at your shoes, crossing your fingers tightly.
“Uhm…” he started. You looked up immediately, but he wasn’t even looking at you. He had his fist to his mouth and was staring intently at the ground. To your horror, he continued with the dreaded word:
“Sorry…”
It’s over. Damn it.
Your face was flaming hot. In fact, it was the exact shade of the pickled radish that your mom made, a food you hated with a passion. It was totally expected, but you still felt like sh*t.
You tuned out the rest of his words, wallowing in your misery. He gave an apologetic smile before running out the door to catch up to his friends. Listlessly, you raised your hand to wave goodbye.
Of course he’d reject you! What were you expecting, y/n? At least he tried to let you down gently.
Heart pounding, you stormed into the café, and slumped into a chair, burying your face in your arms. You needed a moment to yourself. You sat back up and stared daggers at the table, mind racing with all sorts of what-if’s.
Maybe I should’ve given him something… I should’ve taken notes from Yuqi! It worked for her…
You were so preoccupied with your heartbreak that you failed to notice that you had just seated yourself across from Kim Seungmin. The two of you weren’t that familiar, but you recognized him as the outgoing kid with an A+ in Brandonbury and a lot of art major friends.
Seungmin had his headphones on and was listening to depressing anime soundtracks as he sketched people around the café. He’d seen your exchange with Joshua outside, and saw you walk in shortly after. He eyed you curiously, struggling to remember where he had seen you before. Although there were plenty of other open seats in the café, you chose to sit right in front of him.
Shrugging, he looked over you, then started to draw. Your face was an unnatural shade of red and your eyes were large, he noted. Your nose and lips were well defined too. His smooth pencil lead against the grainy paper made a calming sound, though you couldn’t hear it over the rest of the background noise. The café had an ambient vibe about it between the Christmas music, the sound of coffee being poured, and small talk from across the room.
Buzz.
Simultaneously, you and Seungmin reached for your phones. There were new messages in the group chat.
[jaemin] fml i just sat through my second Brandonbury class of the day 🤢
[renjun] imagine taking econ as a major AND literature as a minor and having bb teach both classes...yuck 🤮 couldn’t be me
[jaemin] shut up nerd
[heejin] you guys, bb ACTUALLY assigned a group project 💀 i thought he was joking
[Attachment: 171217.pdf]
[jaemin] i TOLD you gyus! his class is bad, and i mean BAD
[jaemin] ask changbin or haechan lol we’re not exaggerating
[yuqi] eye-
[jaemin] watch him post like an extra part to the project the day before
[jaemin] whatever who wants to hang w me and hyunjin at our dorm !! we invited the graphic design kids
[heejin] hot stuff but nope not bouta procrastinate
Both you and Seungmin nervously looked at the list of names, and then found your names at the bottom with tiny photos next to them:
Kim Seungmin and y/n: Analysis on William Faulkner
“Y/n…?” Seungmin wondered aloud, a little too loud.
You looked up from your phone to find your partner sitting just a few feet in front of you. “Seungmin? Is that you?”
He jumped out of his skin and hastily flipped to a different page in his notebook.
“Oh, y/n! What a coincidence! So… do you want to work on the project or…?”
“Um… yeah. Sorry. I-I’m not feeling that well today.” You mumbled an unconvincing excuse, and luckily, he didn’t press you.
“I’ll add your phone number and we can work on the project tomorrow. Same place, same time good?” “Alright. Mia’s at 10, then?”
“Yeah–” you started, but your voice broke. “Sorry.”
Your vision blurred as tears welled up in your eyes; you had to get out before you broke down in public. You fumbled with your belongings and rushed out the door without looking back.
–––––
For the rest of the day, you were disgustingly unproductive.
Upon your return to the apartment, you snatched the family-size box of Cocoa Puffs from the cupboard and flopped into the couch, then proceeded to watch crack videos and 2-star rom coms on your phone, swiping away Ryujin’s eager queries– until you remembered how fed up you were with love.
“Piss off, Viki. Screw you and your third-rate romance.” You put your phone down and went to you room to watch Netflix instead, but you just couldn’t find anything worth watching. With a groan, you threw the remote down and fell into your bed.
Curling up, your face in your knees, you cried yourself to sleep.
thursday.
When you opened your eyes, you found yourself tucked in tight, enveloped in the warmth of the blanket. For a serene five minutes, you found peace in the loving embrace of your bed, but suddenly remembered the cold reality from the traumatic events yesterday. You wished that you never woke up from last night’s dream.
Throwing the covers off, you stepped into the kitchen, where Ryujin was waiting with a warm plate of french toast. Oh my god, y/n. This is why you don’t give your only spare keys to your best friend.
She looked at you expectantly, but didn’t say anything. However, you could practically hear her:
“Spill.”
So you did. As always, her reactions were way over the top, but that’s what you loved about her. Every time you paused, she’d slip in some remark or comment about the punchableness of his face.
When you finished the story, you helped yourself to some french toast while Ryujin fantasized how she was going to repay the boy that broke her best friend’s heart.
“Thanks, Ryujin. I don’t know what I’d do without you,” you laughed.
She tackled you in a huge bear hug and put her hands on your shoulders.
“If anyone else breaks your heart, I’ll kick their ass,” she proclaimed.
“Maybe later,” you advised her. “You’d better go soon, it’s almost 9.”
“Oh, sh*t, you’re right. Though I wouldn’t mind missing Sander’s class. There’s nothing much to learn in psych anyways.”
“I gotta go to work on a project with a classmate soon anyways. Can you drive me?” You looked up at her with puppy eyes.
Ryujin pulled out her keys and jingled them. “Aight. Let’s go, so neither of us are late.”
Stacking the dirty dishes in the sink, the two of you exited your apartment hastily.
–––––
Seungmin yawned and rolled onto his side. The early morning sun filtered through his window curtains, and the fuzzy blue sweater he wore to sleep felt warm against his skin. College was amazing, especially the mornings. Contrary to his high school days, there was no need to get up early to hastily throw his homework together since he didn’t have class until the afternoon.
He rubbed his eyes and sat up, still half-asleep. He felt his way to the bathroom, then turned on the tap to wash his face and brush his teeth. He threw a hoodie on over his pajamas and sweatpants, then headed back to his room.
“Hmmm, what time could it be right now on this fine morning?” He said in a sing-songy voice, turning on his phone. To his horror, he realized he had missed his 8 am alarm, which was supposed to wake him up for the group project meeting he had with you.
Sh*t! He hated missing appointments with people, but above all, he hated making bad impressions on others. Is there still time…? He swiped away the 5 missed call notifications and heart sinking, went straight to your messages.
[you] hey seungmin, are you here yet? sry imight be a little late
[you] i’m at mia’s, where are you? [showing: delivered at 9:29]
[you] hello [showing: delivered at 10:01]
[you] ??? [showing: read now at 10:23]
–––––
[seungmin🎨] shhit
[seungmin🎨] i am os sryoyr
[you] ??
[seungmin🎨] i dint mena to wasyte ur time, im sry TT
[you] so are you coming or…??
It had been 5 minutes and he still hadn’t answered. You stared down at the phone screen in disbelief. Sorry my ass. He’s not coming, is he.
You took a deep breath and set the thought aside. Even though the sting of betrayal gnawed at the back of your mind, you had a day to finish this thing. No matter how you felt, you had to get things done. Should’ve known…
But honestly, it would be a lie if you said you expected him to ditch. It was quite a disappointment, really. Seungmin was never late to any classes, and didn’t seem like the type to go back on a meeting so last minute.
It’s fine, you tried to convince yourself. I work best alone anyways. I can do this.
Determination didn’t get you very far. After reading the instructions the fourth time over, you figured it’d be a good idea to whip up an agenda to keep on track. When you finished, you leaned back in satisfaction and looked over the deadlines you set for yourself. Your face crumpled.
Who am I kidding? you sniffled. How am I going to finish this all in a day?
“Screw you, Brandonbury, screw you, literature, screw you, project, screw you–”
Just then, the café door jingled open.
“Ah, I’m so sorry I’m late!”
Kim Seungmin stood in the doorway, hair disheveled and cheeks flushed. Seeing you, he flashed a sheepish smile. You gulped. You could never hate someone with a face like that.
He sat across from you and took out his laptop. Unlike yours, which had tacky stickers plastered all over it — some of which were so old their lamination was starting to peel off — you’d believe him if he said he bought his yesterday.
You felt your anger dissipate — this boy was the physical embodiment of perfection — but you couldn’t help but envy how well he had his life together.
You cleared your throat. “Well, first we should start by organizing our research-”
“Oh, I already finished that.” Seungmin said calmly, not looking up from his computer screen.
“Uhm, alright, next we need to prepare materials for the mind map-” You started again.
“Yeah. I brought them, they’re in the trunk right now.”
“Okay. Then that just leaves us with the research papers-”
“I finished mine already.” He looked up for a split second, then looked back down onto his screen. “You know what, I’ll just share the folder with you.”
As your partner busied away on the computer, you bit at your lip until you tasted blood.
He must think I’m such a crappy partner… ! All this time, while I was crying over my rejection, he was toiling away at this project. And I was mad he was late to our meeting…?
You buried your face in your arms. You thought you got over it, but the horrible feeling from yesterday was back again, creeping in the back of your throat. What’s wrong with you, y/n? Why are you such a piece of–
“Hey, y/n,” Seungmin interjected, and the grey fog faded away.
“Huh?” You looked up to find him resting his head on his arms, face just inches from yours.
“You look like you need a breather. C’mon, we can work on the project later.”
“But–”
Seungmin was already making his way out the door with your belongings. You followed him out the door.
He dumped your things in the front seat of his car, then made his way to the other side. You followed him hesitantly.
“What’re you standing around for? Come in. We’re going for a drive.”
“What do you mean, ‘we’re going for a drive’? What about the project?!” you stared at him in disbelief.
“The project can wait. After all, it’s the holidays! You shouldn’t be wasting it toiling over some wack assignment your wack professor assigned for no valid reason.”
Still, you hesitated. Can I… ?
“Come on. What are you waiting for? Get in, loser, we’re going shopping.” He patted the shotgun seat invitingly.
Yeah, whatever. Screw Brandonbury. It’s not like my week can get any worse, anyways.
You laughed, rolling your eyes at the dumb reference, and slid into the car.
“There you go,” Seungmin smiled. “It’s not a bad idea to loosen up every once in a while. So, how does it feel to be a rebel?”
“Exhilarating,” you answered, and the two of you drove away on the snowy road.
–––––
“No! Don’t you dare!” You wrestled the array of hangers away from Seungmin. “You can’t stop me,” Seungmin teased, slowly pulling out his credit card.
“I said no. You brought me here and stayed with me, not to mention, you did like, all of the project on your own.”
“Come on, it’ll be my Christmas present for you–” The smirk fell off his face as the realization hit him.
“Wait. The project!”
Seungmin scooped out his phone to look at the time: 8:45.
The mall was going to close soon, anyways (though you were rushing for a different reason). You raced towards the door, sneakers squeaking against the floor like the track star you were.
“Hurry up! You’re slower than my wifi!” you yelled over your shoulder, impatiently holding the door open. Seungmin dropped the pretty ruby necklace he was holding and followed you out the door.
–––––
“Let’s work at my place. Go straight, then take a left over there,” you ordered.
“Aye aye, captain.”
Between your shortcuts and Seungmin’s concise driving, you made it back to the apartment in record time. With no time to waste, the two of you burst through the door, seated yourselves on the couch, and got straight to work.
“Alright, I’ll start the mind map while you write your paper.” Seungmin procured a giant poster board and whipped out his art supplies, which he promptly spilled on the wooden floor.
“Dang, you’re really going all out with this,” you remarked, in awe of the amount of art supplies he had. “My paper’s gonna sound like I wrote it drunk and/or high at 3 am.”
“The 3 am part sounds about right, and I could go for a beer right now,” Seungmin answered.
“Sober or not, we better get to work. What time’s this due again?”
“10 am at Brandonbury’s hall, that damn bummy sack of potatoes. He said something about leaving a folder out.”
“Right.” You glanced at the clock; it was a quarter past 9. You cracked your neck and your back, then let out a huff of air. “10 hours and 45 minutes to get this done! Shouldn’t be too bad.”
“Haha… not too bad? Let’s see if you can say the same thing later.” Seungmin remarked, not looking up from drawing on the poster paper.
–––––
“I take it back, it’s bad,” you groaned. It was nearly midnight and you were on the conclusion of your research paper. Writer’s block was hitting hard, and after a few minutes of deep contemplation, you frustratedly deleted the sentence you had started.
“I was about to say, ‘damn this Faulkner guy’, but that’s uncalled for. On the other hand, Brandonbury…” Seungmin trailed off with a yawn.
“How’s the mind map going?” You sat beside him on the carpet and curiously looked over the result after 3 hours of hard work. Unfortunately, he’d squandered all that time designing the poster instead of actually putting information down.
“What do you think?”
“It’s very pretty… but what are you planning to write on it?”
“Well, the thing is,” Seungmin scratched his head sheepishly. “I haven’t… quite… figured that out yet…?”
“Seriously?! You’re impossible. Here, write my conclusion for me.” You handed your laptop over to him, then took a pencil and leaned over the poster. “I’ll handle the mind map.”
“Go ahead,” he sighed, cracked his back, and began to type.
As for this thing, you thought to yourself, where do I start…? Oh right! I have my notes organized on my laptop... oh well. I'll get it later.
In large, capital letters, you wrote “William Faulkner” in the center of the poster. To your irritation, it was ever so slightly off-center.
Screw it. I’ll leave the artsy stuff to Seungmin. Anyways, I have more important things to be thinking about right now.
Without hesitation, you continued on. Through the wee hours of the night, the room was silent except for the click clack of the keyboard and the scritch scratch of the pencil. And of course, the occasional chime of the grandfather clock that solemnly reminded the two of you that time was running out.
saturday.
“Be my partner next project, too.” Talking in your sleep (being half-awake was worse than being drunk), you buried your face into Seungmin’s fluffy blue sweater. Not breaking focus, he grinned without taking his eyes off the paper.
“And what makes you so sure I’ll want you?” he replied jokingly, but his words kind of stung.
“Mmmm...yeah, I don’t blame you.” You stroked the sweater with a bittersweet smile, pulling out a stray strand of hair.
Realizing how harsh that came out, he dropped his pen and turned to face you. “Hey, you know that’s not what I meant.”
You squinted through your sleepy eyes and set the sweater down, then crawled up next to him. You grabbed the nearest pen and started drawing on the poster.
“That’s why I’m gonna work hard to be a partner you’d want to have,” you said groggily.
With determination set on your face, you did your best to trace Seungmin’s sketches. Though it wasn’t as smooth as it could’ve been, it wasn’t as bad as it could’ve been, either.
Just as the clock struck 3, you and Seungmin set your pens down. The two of you had scrutinized all the little details until at last, you were satisfied with your work.
“I think… we’re done,” you said in shock. Your muscles ached, and your feet felt antsy after kneeling for so long,
“Yay,” Seungmin cheered wearily. “Now we’ve got 4 whole hours to ourselves.”
“We should get some sleep. But to be honest, there’s so much caffeine in me, I don’t think I can even go to sleep. Kind of. I don’t know, still kinda sleep though. Uh oh, I’m shaking. Is it possible to OD on caffeine?”
Seungmin eyed you with concern. “I… don’t think that’s good for you. You need help, child.”
“Okay, then.” You leaned into the sofa and looked sideways at him. “Can you help me?”
“Sure. What do you need help with?” Your personal therapist closed his eyes and waited for you to talk.
“Truth is, on Wednesday, the reason I flaked out was that I made my first confession… and I got my first rejection.” You hid your face in your hands.
“I just don’t get it. What did I do wrong? Was it something I said? Was it me–”
“You know any good pick-up lines?” Seungmin interrupted.
“Pick-up lines…?” you asked, perplexed.
“The secret to a successful relationship is an effective pick-up line,” he advised. “Give it your best shot.”
“Hmm… maybe something like… uh… ‘Was wondering if you had an extra heart, ‘cuz mine was just stolen.’”
“Mhm… that wasn’t bad,” he remarked, but looked unimpressed. “Try thinking cheesier, though.”
“Uh… how about, ‘Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears.’”
“Better! You’re getting warmer. Try not to comment on looks too much, though. Focus more on what the person means to you and such.”
“Okay… I got it!” You sat up straight and snapped your fingers triumphantly. “‘They say Disneyland is the happiest place on Earth. Guess no one’s been standing next to you.’”
You looked to Seungmin earnestly, and he nodded in approval. “Well done, my disciple! Next time you ask someone out, don’t forget this foolproof secret technique!”
“Really…?” You doubted these cringeworthy lines would pick up anyone. “You’re telling me that if someone came up to you and told you they’d choose you over Mickey Mouse, you would get with them?”
“What can I say? Cheese is delicious. Especially those aged Italian blocks from those fancy looking shops.”
You elbowed him. “Stop. I don't speak rich…” You trailed off, yawning loudly. Your head was nodding and your eyelids were drooping, but you didn’t want the conversation to end.
“I think it’s time to go to sleep,” Seungmin suggested.
“No… not yet,” you mumbled sleepily. “Can we talk a little while longer?”
“Talk? About what?”
“I dunno… just…” your heavy head dropped onto his shoulder. “Oh! I’m so sorry.” At this point, you felt so tired that you could black out any second, and your head was so heavy that you physically couldn’t lift it up any more. To be honest, it feels kind of nice.
“Don’t worry.”
Seungmin smiled warmly. “A pillow would probably do a better job, but I’ll try my best. Just lean on me.”
A pillow is fluffy, but not nearly as warm, you thought to yourself drowsily. Sinking into him, you closed your eyes and fell into a world of peaceful darkness.
–––––
When you woke up, it was past 10 o’clock and Seungmin was gone. You reached your hand to your forehead to peel off a neon pink post-it neat where a neat note was scribbled.
“went to turn in proj. don’t worry about it and sleep in. when you wake up, let’s go back to the mall. after all, we didn’t end up buying anything that day, did we? i’ll be back before 11. - min ”
Why didn’t you wake me up?! You took the note angrily. We should’ve just turned it in together. Kim Seungmin, why do you have to be so damn nice?
With a sigh, you lifted your butt off the couch and went to the bathroom to freshen up. I’ll just grab him a coffee at Mia’s to thank him, you decided as you brushed your teeth. After washing your face, you sent him a quick text.
[you] meet me at mia’s, imma get some coffee
[you] whats your order
[seungmin🎨] thanks, just a hazel latte pls
You peeled off yesterday’s crusty clothes and put on your favorite oversized hoodie, and you were just about to head out the door when you noticed a familiar light blue sweater hung on your chair.
Upon further inspection, you found another post-it note with the same, typewriter-style handwriting on it.
“also, you drooled on my sweater. :(( please brush your teeth before we go out.”
Face flushed in embarrassment, you crumpled up the note. I take it back. Nice, my ass. Morning breath happens to everyone, you jerk! Not everyone brushes their teeth 6 times a day like you do. I’ll wash it later.
You left the rancid sweater where it was and flew out the door, racing down four flights of stairs and bounding outside to where your ride awaited you.
Ryujin, sharp as always, didn’t miss a beat. She was quick to detect that you were in a good mood. Too good of a mood for a girl who just got rejected. “Over Joshua so soon?” she teased as you took shotgun.
“H-huh?!” You knew she was straightforward, but you weren’t expecting her to be this blunt about it.
“Who’s the lucky guy? No way, you didn’t get laid, did you?! Oh my gosh, no!” she was bursting with excitement. Her hand was shaking as she started up the car.
“Ryujin, shush! He’s not– It’s not like that! He’s my partner for the Brandonbury thing, the one due today. We just screwed up and ended up doing it all last minute,” you explained, but for some strange reason, your heart was fluttering.
“Uh huh… so you’re telling me… you got a boy to stay the night with you– just the two of you– over a project?!” Ryujin was incredulous.
“Hey! If you put it that way–” you blushed. “Nothing happened, I swear!”
There was a pause as Ryujin studied you skeptically. “So… who is this guy, anyways?”
“Seungmin.” You said slowly, lowering your tone ever so slightly.
“Ohhhhh, Kim Seungmin. That makes more sense. He’s probably the only guy in our year that’d stay over at a girl’s place to work on a project.” She shook her head, clicking her tongue.
“Come to think of it, you guys suit each other. It’s like you guys were made for each other.”
You snapped up. “What do you mean by that?!”
“You’re both major blockheads,” she laughed.
“Hey!” you protested, but you couldn’t get her remark out of your mind. We suit each other…? If Ryujin thinks so, it’s gotta be true! She might’ve said it as a joke, but… do we really…?
“I’ll wait for you in here,” Ryujin said, leaning against her seat, crossing her legs, and pulling out her phone. You hadn’t even realized the car had already stopped in front of the coffee shop.
“Oh, right.” You clumsily climbed out of the car, trying to gather your thoughts, and strode into the café. Absentmindedly, you placed your order, not forgetting to thank the cashier. Shortly after, you picked up your coffee and headed back to the car.
However, an unexpected encounter with a familiar face stopped you in your tracks.
“Oh, y/n! There you are!”
“Joshua…” You mustered up a somewhat believably genuine smile, but on the inside, you cursed yourself.
… Sh*t, I forgot! It’s 10 am– Joshua o’clock.
“Listen, about the other day–” he started, but you decided you didn’t want to hear it.
You put a hand up to silence him. “I’m so sorry, I honestly don’t know what I was doing, but don’t worry about it.”
He blinked at you in bewilderment. “But–”
“No, no, it’s fine. Sorry for making things so weird. I’ve never confessed before,” you laughed, your hair falling over your eyes as you averted your gaze in embarrassment.
“Y/n, wait! I’m trying to say yes! Honestly, I don’t feel like I deserve someone as good as you, but if you’re willing to give me a shot–”
“And just who the hell do you think you are?” Ryujin interjected, stepping between you and Joshua, holding her arm over you like a shield.
“Damn right you don’t deserve her. Y/n, this guy wasn’t hassling you, was he?! Nobody touches my best friend and gets away with it!” She cracked her knuckles menacingly.
“No, I’m telling you, you’ve got it all wrong!” Joshua put his hands up to show he meant no harm, but Ryujin wasn’t taking it.
“So who the hell are you, anyways?” She crossed her arms and looked down at him.
“Ryujin… meet Joshua, and Joshua… meet Ryujin.” You figured if you mediated and introduced the two to each other, you would avoid a large-scale conflict, but little did you know that you had just signed Joshua’s death warrant. Oops.
“Joshua, huh…? So you’re the one that made my bestie cry. Get over here. I’m gonna whoop your ass.”
“Ryujin–” you started, but she wasn’t listening. Joshua took a step back as she pressed forward. His hands were up in a sign of surrender, but Ryujin was ready to paint the white flag red.
Oh God, you groaned to yourself. You knew that once she got started, there was no stopping her. You caught Joshua’s eye, mouthed a quick sorry, and dreadfully watched as Ryujin unleashed her wrath.
–––––
“Hey, is right now a bad time?” Seungmin came up beside you as your bestie verbally assaulted your first love. “You know her?”
“Nah, I was hoping you’d come. Let’s get out of here! I got your coffee,” you announced, holding up the warm drink to your face.
“Heck yeah! Nothing like a healthy dose of caffeine to get your day started right,” he cheered, opening the car door for you before getting in himself.
“So, to the mall, right? Can’t believe we spent all that time yesterday picking out those clothes and didn’t end up buying any of it,” he groaned.
“Guess you’re not well-trained in the noble art of window shopping.” You said, shrugging.
“Who needs to window shop when you’ve got a credit card?” he grinned, to which you rolled your eyes. What a douche.
The car ride ensued in an awkward silence, aside from the tick of the blinker and the classic Christmas songs on KOST 103.5, everyone’s go-to station this time of the year. Seungmin decided to break the uncomfortable atmosphere.
“If you don’t mind me asking, what was all that about earlier?” he probed, searching your face to check that it was a question safe to ask. You took a deep breath and spilled the tea.
“Joshua Hong, however you may know him, was my first venture in the mysterious realm of love…” you began, and Seungmin listened intently.
–––––
“Oh! Is that what you were asking about last night? Well, this morning, technically.” Seungmin said, eyes wandering his surroundings.
You and Seungmin were meandering aimlessly around the mall, checking around for good deals before dedicating to one store.
“What?”
“When you talked about how you got rejected and stuff,” he reminded you, sipping his hazelnut latte. “Then we got into pick-up lines. That was pretty funny.”
There was a strange feeling in your chest talking to Seungmin. “Do you really think they’d work?” you asked.
“Yeah, I’m telling you. Pick-up lines seal the deal.”
“I can’t tell if you’re kidding anymore.” You said, nudging his side.
“I’m not! If someone came up to me and delivered that type of line, they’d totally have my heart.”
You stopped in your tracks, a strange expression on your face.
“Y/n? What’s up?” Seungmin turned around, confused. “Are you okay?”
“If that’s true… then…” Omgomgomg, what the hell, y/n. You're crazy. You're totally crazy– You took a deep breath. “‘They say Disneyland is the happiest place on Earth.’” You looked him straight in the eye, holding his gaze.
“Kim Seungmin, will you be my Disneyland?”
No response. Seungmin just blinked at you. He was a statue, a very painfully cute statue, but you knew well that statues didn’t talk. Though the silence was unnerving and you were aware that your cheeks were unnaturally red, you didn’t drop your gaze.
He blinked once, then twice, and finally, opened his mouth. You braced yourself for the worst.
“I’m no Park,” he started slowly, “but if you’ll take a Kim, I’d be more than happy to be your amusement–” He covered his mouth with his fist.
“Ack, that was bad, let’s pretend that didn’t happen. What I was trying to say was… yes.” Embarrassment written all over his face, Seungmin flashed you a wide, lopsided grin, but it was the prettiest smile you’d ever seen.
You felt like you were flying. You ran up to his side with a new spring in your step, and the two of you continued to walk along as if nothing had happened.
Maybe to the rest of the passerby, you and Seungmin looked no different than from five minutes ago, but this time as you strolled along, you leaned onto his shoulder ever so slightly. But this time, you didn't need to ask for permission.
~ fin ~ ...or is it?? hehe stay tuned for more
UPDATE: part two !
✿ ✿ ✿
i drew a little smth for christmas...!!
- struz
















