#yenniskier

[straightestguyinbaltimore]

Jaskier: You really love me.

Geralt: Why would you say that?

Jaskier: You are paying my bills, I have a spare key of your house, I pack your daughter lunch and drive her to school

Geralt:

Jaskier: Why the fuck did you even ask? I literally sleep between you and your wife.

Jaskier: Who is also my wife.

Geralt:

Yennefer: leave him alone he still calls me his dear friend.

Jaskier: He calls me that too... Are we never gonna fix that?

Yennefer *glance at Geralt whose system UI is overwhelmed and slowly shutting down*: You can try, but nah.

Jaskier: Let's just hope no one asks ciri the "can we be friends" question at school then.

Ciri *entering*: Hey guys I made some friends at scho-

Geralt: NOOO!

[fangirlshrewt97]

Geralt: When I found Yennefer, it was like an angelic choir was sent down from heaven.

Geralt:

Geralt: I found Jaskier wandering outside Wal-Mart at two in the morning.

[tpchicken7]

I don’t know what season 2 did to me, but I’m even more pissed at Geralt on Jaskier’s behalf than I was at the end of season one. I’m like, nope, no, no, that crap apology is crap and he doesn’t deserve our wonderful Bard. I can’t even read any fix it fics without being too angry. I’m so dumb.

Weren’t we promised a really banging Yennifer song this season? I hope we get it in season 3. I want more Witch/Bard love/hate, and Geralt can just go sit in the corner and Dad for awhile until everyone starts treating Jaskier like a person and not the butt of some joke that everyone but Yenn is in on. I want some ACTUAL consequences for Geralt because of HIS actions.

Jaskier should not let Geralt get away with this weak-ass apology, but I guess we’ll just have to see if like most shows they gloss over the pain and recovery and move back to everything is alright for the sake of plot.

[valliantknight]

Angry mob leader: Julian Alfred Pankratz you are sentenced to death. You will be hung. Yennefer, from the back of the mob: He’s already hung! Jaskier: Sir, untie me so I can high-five my wife. Person in mob: Wait isn’t that the witch Jennefer of Vengerberg? Yennefer: My name is Yennefer. And also I’m a sorceress.  Mob: Get her! She’s going to try free the prisoner!  Yennefer proceeds to lead the mob on a wild goosechase after her, meanwhile back at Jaskier... Geralt, who has taken out the remaining guards and is untying Jaskier: Could you stay out of trouble. For five minutes!? Jaskier, flirtily: Ooh what are you gonna do, punish me? ;)  Geralt, glaring: Yes. 

[straightestguyinbaltimore]

Yen and Jaskier: We are better off without him.

Geralt, at the edge of Kaer Morhen, with his golden eyes, snow-white moonlit hair and rosy lips (yes they are fucking rosy check out the scene of him and vesemir talking about ciri), staring into the mountains like a melancholy statue of some mountain god:

Yen and Jaskier:

Jaskier: We are having him back right?

Yen: Yeah.

🥂

(well I admit this is a stretch because both of them literally wanted him back IMMEDIATELY AFTER FIRST SIGHT. So much love.)

[straightestguyinbaltimore]

Modern AU. At some huge celebrity event.

Reporter: So! Fans have been guessing based on you new singles " her sweet kiss" and " Burn", is it true that you and Geralt broke up because of his relationship with Yennefer?

Jaskier the Grammy-winning singer & songwriter: I will not be answering questions regarding my work's inspiration, fictitious or otherwise.

Yennefer, the Oscar-winning actress, passes by, leans over and kisses him on the cheek, looks in the cameras: Leave him alone.

And then they refer to each other as husband & wife, every single reporter confused but goes absolute fucking nuts.

Meanwhile, Geralt, the top special agent of some secret force, who is having a hard time hiding his identity as he accidentally dated two celebrities on a few missions, wiping his weapons while watching that live event on TV: what the f-

Ciri, holding up the swear fine box: 👀

[straightestguyinbaltimore]

Circle of protection:

*danger*

Jaskier: instinctively protects yen

Geralt: knows he doesn't have to protect yen but now has to step forward to protect them both as jaskier CANNOT fight a fucking monster

Yennefer: moving from behind them to Geralt's side, (those men just keep blocking my fucking sight, should have just made myself 8 feet tall during the transformation)

Jaskier: ah, oh, yeah, right, I'll just, eh, be your solid backing, don't worry your backs are safe with me... hey Roach how's it going

THE interesting chemistry between geraskefer is that jaskier subconsciously, instinctively would treat a lady he loves (any lady he loves) with care and protection. Like in season one E4 he was literally protecting a random lady that the storm accidentally threw in his arms the second he saw her. The reason that he didn't do that with yen in S1 is because he was straight out hostile and treating her as not only an enemy but an enemy that might hurt Geralt.

In S2 that changed so we can see it happen all over the place. Him trying to protect yen is just, so, so adorable. Even without magic, she still has fighting skills and, fuck, Yen can literally aim with a fucking axe, she managed to chop the chains without hurting the person wearing them, anyone who's ever used a long axe, would know how much strength and control that fucking takes. That is SKILL not just muscles.

Meanwhile Geralt, instinctively protects jaskier, as he's used to jaskier running to him with danger behind (monster or just some man at the bar) from years of traveling together.

And yennefer, just being YENNEFER

I jus can't get enough of this

[straightestguyinbaltimore]

Jaskier getting picked on, yennefer getting protective, and Geralt trying to stop mass murder and arson.

Jaskier: *starts a heated argument with some moron that dissed his songs*

Yennefer, sips her drink and leans over jaskier, stares at the person right in the eye: Apologize.

Jaskier: Yes that was rude you apologize.

The person: Or what?

Yennefer gently smiles: If I were you, I'd shut the fuck up and get the fuck out in five seconds.

The person: or what you bit-

Yennefer: FIVE, FOUR -

Geralt dashes here in time to punch the guy in his guts and throws him out of the tavern. Feeling good for saving a human and possibly half a tavern from being set on fire.

Good job Geralt, way to go, friend of humanity, toss a coin.