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Happy Pride y’all, here’s the TWST cast ranked by how likely they are to attend a pride parade.

1) Kalim. He heard parade and said yes. Super into it, having a great time. Does the face paint and gives out free hugs. Jamil is having a heart attack. Doesn’t always get it, but is always supportive.

2) Vil. Honestly he probably helped set up at least one float. Wearing his cuntiest outfit and will tell you all about Queer history if you ask. Very much views it as an important cultural event and not just a party. Roasts every homophobe he sees.

3) Cater. Live-streaming the whole thing. Also has face paint on. Taking selfies with everyone and everything. Gets along with with everyone. A little bit superficial and performative about it but he’s genuinely happy to be there.

4) Floyd. Having a great time. Covered in glitter, also giving out free hugs (though his are of dubious quality) and is squeezing every homophobe he meets. Comes home covered in paint, glitter and what might be blood. Says they should go again next year.

5) Rook. He brought his camera and is taking so many photos, won’t stop waxing poetic about the beauty of the event. Walks up to random strangers and tells them they’re beautiful. People either burst into tears or say he’s a creep.

6) Lilia. Didn’t initially know what it was, but once he heard of it, he was in. Can’t stay as long as he wants to due to his age, but he enjoys every second there. Gives out free dad hugs.

7) Jack. Enjoys the sense of community and will punch the lights out of any homophobe. Walks people to the bus stop and train stations after the event is over so they feel safe.

8) Malleus. Just happy to be invited tbh. Gives a speech to everyone he meets about resilience and pride. Has a good time but has to leave early because he got overwhelmed. Smites a homophobe.

9) Ortho. Volunteered as security for the parade and takes his job Extremely Seriously. Covered in glitter. Overall having a good time. Will rattle off facts about the history of Pride. Knows every microlable ever.

10) Trey. Mostly here to make sure people don’t pass out from heat stroke. Hands out water bottles, sunscreen and granola bars. Has a good time over all.

11) Azul. Mostly here for appearances at the start but gets really into it. Was not originally wearing glitter but he definitely was by the time the parade ended. Hangs out with a bunch of drag queens and has a great time. Feels genuinely happy and comfortable.

12) Jade. Appears to be having a good time at least. Very calm and quiet despite how rowdy everything gets.

13) Jamil. Mostly came cause someone has to keep an eye on Kalim. He feels kinda upset being surrounded by these people who are out and proud and in control of their lives while he has no choice and no escape. Feels envious and sad. Probably cries at some point. Very classic “closeted at pride” feelings. Probably ends up having a crisis

14) Deuce. Starts off relatively subdued but is riled up by the end. Gets in a brawl with some assholes by the end of the parade and comes home covered in glitter with a black eye. Also walks people home.

15) Silver. Does he totally get what’s going on? No. But he’s having a pretty good time at least.

16) Riddle. Crying by the end of it. Someone who does those free mom hugs hugs him and he cries his eyes out. Emotionally kinda overwhelmed. Ends up telling his life story to a group of random strangers. Comes home with new character development.

17) Leona. Got dragged here by someone else, but is having a pretty good time, not that he’d ever admit it.

18) Ruggie. Enjoys it but also thinks it’s kind of frivolous? Dislikes how its caters to the public and thinks that Pride should be less corporate. The opinions of a guy who dislikes how “mainstream” it is. Sometimes goes.

19) Sebek. Also doesn’t get what’s going on. Probably wouldn’t go on his own- it just wouldn’t occur to him. Claps a lot. Cheers whenever something happens. Has no clue what he’s supposed to be doing, but by god is he going to do it well.

20) Ace. Doesn’t get what’s so important about it. Probably gets drunk and his friends have to drag him home. Cishet guy who’s mostly there cause his friends are.

21) Idia. It’s a parade. With people. Who are loud. Will not go, and if Ortho does manage to drag him there, Idia has a panic attack five minutes in and has to leave. Cannot deal with the crowd.

22) Epel. Self explanatory I feel. Vil might drag him there anyways, but Epel would be uncomfortable and leave.