A/n: Double dare you to join me in this slow, torturous journey. No warnings so far, other than the foreshadowing for a lot of pain. Zuko fanart by regnm_lab; Sokka fanart by mellorine.deviantart.
Pairing: Sokka x Reader x Zuko
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Saudade;
origin: Portuguese
meaning: Saudade is an untranslatable Portuguese term that describes a solemn and melancholic feeling of longing. Saudade can be a longing for something which does not and probably cannot exist or refer to the love that remains long after someone or something is gone and may not return – a nostalgic longing for a person or thing that was loved once, but is now lost. This feeling is a recurring theme in Portuguese and Brazilian literature.
Life ought to be a sick play written by forces above.
Dying as you are, that seems to be the only conclusion at the tip of your tongue. It rises from between your broken ribs, it blooms in the cracks of your bruises like fungus and it pours of you like the blood drying on the floor, so dark and smelling so strong.
Was it supposed to be this way?
Was every person under the Sun obliged to live miserable lives because, in the end, nobody seemed to be truly happy for long? Where did all of this infinite cycle of rage, violence and hatred start, and would it ever end?
If there were answers, the cold and the darkness took your ability to reach them.
Lying with your arms chained behind your back, spread apart like wings and your knees supporting your weight on the ground, nothing other than the world’s ugliness came to thought.
That is…
Thinking of them hurt too much.
It must have been a fever dream.
The ones who captured you must have spiked the last water you drank or poisoned your mind because in no way could they be real. It would be too cruel, even for the evil writers of life’s play, to give you so much love only to take it away almost in the same breath.
There had been no smiles, no touches, no growing intimacy and conversation—none of that had been real and it would do you well to remember that.
Tears fall once again, because that weak attempt at erasing the loves of your life is more frail than whatever irrational thoughts led people to capture you, torture a soul they had never met in order to cause havoc in someone else’s.
People’s nature could be horrific, tainted and rotten in many ways which you already knew, and now in new ways you unfortunately came to discover.
But still…
Having known so much love before your life ended in such a miserable way had wrecked more havoc than Elypse’s volcano somewhere deep in your soul.
Crying, you tried remembering what lying between their bodies felt like.
Maybe you could at least die with the ghost of their lips saying your name as their touch warmed your skin.
Everything was so gloom and cold these past few days.
The cave’s entrance makes its noise, and you whimper, dreading what’s to come.
Hellooo so this is my first fic and also the first time i post so everything is gonna be messy. I'll try to post a fic a day as I challenged myself to write one a day for February. Pls read my post scriptum at the end of my fic!
Summary: a "pool" (lake) party with the gaang, you get close to Zuko <3
the 1rst
Guessable smut, stays very fluff and fun!
The air was heavy and a bit on the hotter side. And since you’d been walking for three hours now, well you were in need of freshness. And now you had hit a dead end ! Great… You were in a very happy mood but just too tired to make any effort. You looked behind your shoulder, turning to the rest of the group you were leading. Everybody seemed to be tired too. Fed up might be more precise. “Looks like we need to change the direction a bit” you said.
“Huh seriously ?!” replied Sokka with his usual, annoyed voice. “Come on… Wait what are you even talking about Y/N, there is no wall in front of us ! A cliff is jumpable, right ? We can just keep going one, and not lose any more time. I don’t want to spend another day on this boring journey.”
He was right ; there was no wall, just a cliff. Maybe with some bending, one of you could help to continue straightforward and go on, without making any detour.
Aang suddenly started running. “Don’t you guys hear it ?! There’s water !” There was no rush, but instinctively everyone started running with him. Playfully, you sprinted faster to win the race nobody but you were aware of. And you did get first. Maybe with a little bit too much impulse. When you reached the precipice, you slowed down a bit too late, and you almost lost your balance, risking falling… In the lake ! You guys had found a lake ! Without any words, everyone knew what you had to do. Jump. In a heartbeat, you found Zuko, and placing your hands on his waist and shoulder, pushed him over the edge. But as he was falling, he managed to grab you back and you dived off in the water together, while you were screaming with laughter. It was perhaps 5 or 6 meters high, and you felt both butterflies and a cardiac arrest, and when your body hit the water, you were still holding on tightly to Zuko. One second forward ; finally a cold feeling submerges you. The momentum brought you deep in the water, and behind all the bubbles you’d created, the water was crystal clear. You managed to open your eyes only to meet Zuko’s. And you smiled even more.
When your head finally got out of the water, you both took a huge breath, halfway between painting and laughing, almost relieved you resurfaced somehow. The eye contact between you and your partner in crime was gaining in lust, only to be broken by water splashing on your eyes: the others had jumped too. (Appa wanted too but Ang told him off… Poor thing, he must be so hot under that fur coat !).
You all played happily in the water, forgetting about the time. What brought you to reality though, were droplets falling from the sky. It has begun to rain. “I’m getting shelter !” uttered Katara, leaving the natural pool. “But, it’s not like we're not wet already !” you said, confused. But everyone was getting out. “I mean, you do you, I’m staying” you added, without any animosity. “Yeah me too”. You were surprised again, you knew who’s raspy voice that was but you did not expect him to stay too. Not that you were disappointed, it’d be the contrary actually…
You turned back to Zuko and watched everyone leave, Katara and Aang using water bending to drive themselves, Sokka Toph and Momo too, back to the upper edge, crying out complaints to the rain.
“So… Are we gonna continue having fun or did I break the mood ?” The boy asked. You weren’t sure if it was ironic or not, but you found it funny nonetheless. “Of course !” you turned back to him, halfly jumping to hug him, throwing yourself in his arms since the water created resistance. You quickly backed down, still having your hand on his shoulders. “I was wondering, can you fire-bend under water ?”
“- I’m not sure. Have I ever thought of that ? It seems pretty doable.” The whole time he stared right through your eyes, not an ounce of shyness or embarrassment. You both were at ease. You never clarified the nature of your relationship, but it was something like a very close friendship. Maybe more, but not enough to be romantic love, or so you thought. It was hard to guess what he felt too.
You both stepped back at the same time, tacitely letting him room to try your request. Connecting the stances, he finally pushed his fist firmly in the water, aiming next to your right hip. Nothing happened, but suddenly you felt a quick hot current passing besides you. You only had the time to begin a smile and raise your eyebrows when Zuko wondered: “It didn’t do anything, did it ?” “Yes, yes it did ! You just made hot water !” You jumped to hug him again, except this time, taken by surprise and under your pressure, he fell back, and you with him. You both resurfaced laughing, and this time he was the one pushing you lightly, guiding you by the hips to the side of the pool, near a small, rocky but flat platform.
Your knees tumbled and you fell seated on the rocks, him upon you.
[i’m so sorry but i’m too lazy to finish and i need to sleep for my exam tomorrow, but i’ll give you headcanons for some steamy ending i always imagine]
bla bla bla he says some sexy phrase to you
somehow he ends up seated and you're sitting on top of him, looking at him.
again smutty dialog
make out session
more if you want
even some drama with the gaang involved if that’s what you want. i just figured this setting could be fun or sexy for some fluff or smut. You know, you in a pretty swimsuit and zuko with wet hair ~~
A/N : okay so. This is my first real fic, intented to share, in English. Also english is my third language so that explains how poorly written this is. For the whole month of Feb I challenged myself and draw and write a thing a day. I'll try and post em too! This is mainly for myself, but if I can distract anyone with a ff too well, good ig. I'm a multi stan verse kinda person so I'll write about anyone I like and i have scenarios for. I'll also try and be creative with what I write and how I do it.
This was written I a rush, I needed to go to sleep but wanted to complete my daily challenge so i couldn't proof read! And i posted it late too cause I slept. Anyways I'm so eager to see if I will keep up! <33
Description: You may not know Zuko, but you know Lee-- the tea-maker at The Jasmine Dragon.
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For the record, all you wanted to say was this: being homeless was not fun.
Sure, there were times when you were little that you wanted to leave the house. You tried to slam the door on your mom, who made you train because you couldn't waterbend and screech, "Good riddance, buttholes!"
Although you'd be grateful that you wouldn't be as annoying as the fat lady with her butt sticking out and her nose pointed high, you just wished you had a place to stay.
Four months. It had been four months since you were banished from the Northern Water Tribe, which was a memory you had tried to erase from your mind for days. You never liked to reminisce on that moment, not at all.
But now? Now, being homeless was the hardest thing that you've ever gone through.
"Excuse me?" You asked, eyeing a stranger who briskly walked past you. The woman who passed by always came around at four am, with her pants so big that you could see half her underwear, and her shirt so small that her big stomach seemed to bulge out.
"It's the fat lady!" You awed, then cupping your hands over your mouth when you realized you said it out loud. "Do you have any spare change-" you began as innocently as possible.
"Stay out of my way," the fat lady growled, smacking her bag in your face. You grumbled as you took a look in your metal disk that you used to pick up coins, empty, as always.
You saw another man pass by-- he was holding a long, wooden cane and wearing a pair of sunglasses.
"Do you have any spare change?" You asked, holding the disk out.
The man looked at you dead in the eye, only to shake his head and walk off.
You cursed under your breath and shivered. The sun wasn't even up yet, and the sky was still a deep shade of navy. There weren't many people walking around, but if there were, you'd probably have to leave before a bunch of other people started staring at you all weird.
You waved the disk up like a frisbee, closing your eyes and imagining yourself back in the Northern Water Tribe and playing games with all the other kids, but of course, that was nothing more than a fantasy world that you were living in.
Your hands traced along the scar you had since you were only four-- from the fire nation. The burn mark started just over your eyebrows, which coiled in a dark red line, which then inched its way down the very back of your neck.
You usually wore a mask or used a shield of hair to cover up the scar. It wasn't something you were very proud of-- as your mother always scolded, "scars are a way of ridiculing yourself. I cannot allow a member of my own family to have one."
You never liked to get deep into your backstory, so you pushed that fact away when you saw a teen boy walk towards your direction. He had blonde hair and freckles that went all over his face.
Eagerly, you outstretched your hand. "Do you have any spare change?"
The boy scoffed, rolled his eyes, and then crouched down in front of you. "Yeah," he said softly.
You looked expectantly as his hands rummaged into his pockets, only to come out empty as he slapped you across the face.
"Stay out of my way, freak!" he shouted as he kicked dust in your face and stomped away.
The slap hurt- it wasn't as bad as what you had gone through with your mom, but it certainly wasn't something that you were willing to reminisce on.
You traced your hand over where it stung most and winced.
...That was going to leave a mark.
You checked the time by peeking through an old tea shop, which read, 5:09 am.
You still had around three hours before you had to leave somewhere else, so you made the most of it and fell into a restless sleep.
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You woke up to the feeling of someone shaking your shoulder-- the first time you felt it, you simply brushed it off, turned over, and went back to sleep.
Then when you felt it again, you simply took one of the dirty rugs you had and covered it over your face-- you assumed it was another random boy who wanted to beat the living daylights out of you, but then you realized they would have hurt you already.
You opened your eyes to find a boy who looked around your age with jet black hair and golden eyes staring back at you.
Immediately, you got into a battle stance and launched backward, your hands rolled up in fists; the sudden movement making a dust cloud. "Don't touch me," you hissed, brushing a lock of hair from your face.
But when you looked at what he was wearing, inspecting a green apron which read, "The Jasmine Dragon," and holding a tray consisting of all sorts of teacups, you stepped back, apologizing.
"Ah..." you shook your head, embarrassed as you hid your face in shame. "Sorry, I didn't know you were- uh... what time is it?"
The golden-eyed boy looked towards the clock, saying, "It's around 8 in the morning. We're going to be opening in an hour."
"Oh!" you shook your head. "S-sorry, I didn't mean-"
"Nephew, who is this?" the boy's uncle, you assumed, came out of nowhere- he had warm almond brown eyes with friendly wrinkles that traced around his face. He took one good look at you, and he gave you a warm smile.
You decided to like him immediately.
"Sorry for nearly punching your nephew-"
"Bah, he has no problem with that,"
"-my name's (Y/N)." You continued promptly.
"(Y/N). What a lovely name. I'm Ir- Mushi," Mushi, he was called, smiled. He pointed towards the direction of the boy you nearly punched. "That is my nephew, Zu- I mean, Lee. So, who are you?"
"Homeless," the boy- Lee, he was called, replied for you instantly. "I just told her to leave, Uncle."
But as for Lee...?
You didn't like him too much-- and you didn't like being nicknamed, "homeless," even if it was true. It made you so angry that you felt sick to your stomach-- "homeless" wasn't what defined you.
"I'm sorry," you began, blinking your eyes furiously and packing up your things. "I'll leave, sorry about-"
"Lee!" Mushi scolded, his hands crossed punctually across his chest.
"What? Uncle, we need to get to work, we're opening-"
"In an hour," Mushi finished. "We have plenty of time."
The man's kindness he had was so beautiful that you nearly broke down-- not once had he called you homeless, nor had made fun of you. He didn't give you any looks of pity and instead talked to you like an average person-- not like a daughter who disgraced her entire family.
"(Y/N), how would you like to stay at our tea shop today?" Mushi offered. "We'd give you three square meals and a hot shower, how does that sound?"
You gaped, your eyes filled with hope but utterly confused at the same time. Lee seemed to be against it, but before he could speak, you declined first. "Oh, no! I can't, you're too kind, sir. That would be too much to ask; it's alright-"
"Bah, you are too modest, (Y/N)! It would-" the old man persisted.
"Mr. Mushi. It's alright, I promise you. This is too much, and I'm perfectly fine right now!" But if you were honest, that was a lie. If anything, you needed someone to help you, and you needed help now.
"It would be my pleasure," he smiled.
"Certainly not mine," Lee grumbled.
Mushi whispered, "I am deeply sorry about my nephew. He has trouble controlling his temper,"
"I can tell," you laughed. "It's alright-"
But before you could say another word, the old man was dragging you right into the tea shop.
And little did you know, in those few minutes, your entire life would change.
summary: you go on a date with prince Zuko in the fire nation
the 3rd
"Wanna taste ?" Zuko voiced it calmly. How the fuck did you get here? …
[...]
It had been a week since Zuko came back to the Nation, after he killed avatar. You were only his cousin by alliance, but you were so relieved to see him again. Zuko had always meant something more to you, whether you admitted it or not.
During his absence, you had been promoted to something similar to scribe for the Fire Lord himself. You wrote reports of what he asked you to. Your favorite ones though, were the military meetings. It was the only moment where you could admire Zuko peacefully. You'd missed him so much.
Today was a regular but happy day. Because you'd get to spend that precious moment. You had to be seated and prepared before everyone arrived. Zuko was the first one.
"Hello, Y/N". He was so casual, like you weren't in such a formal setting. It was almost disconcerting.
"Hello Prince". You bowed your head. "I wish you a productive meeting".
"Come on Y/N, don't be so distant, there's no one here. Was the time I was away enough for you to forget about me and us ?"
Oh no. Far from it.
You chuckled sweetly. "You're right, sorry. I miss these old times; maybe we could get to see each other in a more relaxed setting. I mean, if you want to". Your voice was calm, but you fuzed internally.
"It'd be a pleasure. Are you free tonight ? We could meet under the Jasmine tree after sunset". Why'd it sound so poetic ?" Perfect for me, we're set". Two generals arrived, and quickly after the meeting began. You couldn't help but feel guilty staring at Zuko this time.
[...]
You'd put effort in your looks for once. You always did, but this time it came from another place, like you wanted to, even though it was an obligation like always. It was kind of cold but you almost forgot it, so captivated by the sky.
"The stars are so pretty tonight, aren't they". He'd arrived. His voice sounded gayer than his usual monotonous tone. And softer.
"Definitively. I'd make star-gazing my profession if I could."
He laughed. "Yeah"
[...]
You had eaten the course. It wasn't especially fancy, just simple shared plates. It only took a few minutes for you two to recover the friendship where it had left off. You remember the old times and swore to create double memories to compensate for the lost years.
The desserts arrived. This time as separated portions. You had a candied sesame dessert while he had a red bean bun. "Looks nice". After waiting for you, you both took a bite. "Mine's so good!" Zuko seemed very satisfied. "Well mine too !", you added delighted. You only had time to look at your dessert when Zuko asked:
"Wanna taste?"
For some reason, that caught you off-guard. You blushed and panicked "uh- y-yes, thank you". You looked up to see him holding out the bun. It was so close to your mouth you understood his intention: you didn't need to hold it, he'll do it for you.
Shy, you put down your plate and your head still inclined, put your hair behind you ear. You bent downwards, to reach the bun.
"You were right, it's very good. Thank you."
A/N: So! Did you expect it? In the beginning this was supposed to be straight out smut, but I don't like smut without a plot, so I thought I'd introduce a context. But then I found myself writing so much I got lazy for the actual smut haha. So you can guess, a continuation after the restaurant, in Zuko's royal suite. He could ask you the same question if you'd like. It's up to you ;)))
