#zykamiliah-merlin

[zykamiliah]

s01e05 "Lancelot" /// s04e02 "The Darkest Hour (Part 2)"

fam can we talk about this callback. can we talk about the fact that the chances of lancelot remembering that moment yeaaaars ago are 200% actually. and that's why he's chuckling and wiggling his eyebrows at merlin. can we talk about lancelot remembering something from like 4+ years ago. can we talk about how in s01e05 merlin was like "i can't do this damn spell im gonna fail arthur's gonna die" but the moment he learns lancelot is on his way to fight the griffin, merlin is like- wooosh. lancelot im here we're doing this together. guys can we talk about how lancelot makes merlin more daring and brave. can we talk about how merlin's actions inspire lancelot. guys guys can we talk about mercelot---

[zykamiliah]

i struggle to think of modern au mercelot scenarios because imo their relationship is so contextual and relies on the fantasy elements of the canon setting. i could see lancelot wanting to become... law enforcement (ew) because of his childhood tragedy, since there are a lot of stories like that already. either that or a soldier/join the army. the latter is more likely i think. but what about merlin??? so much of their friendship is about bravery on the face of the different challenges the world throws at them, the magic that merlin has and lancelot guards and adores. i could see merlin as a doctor of some kind, but WHAT would be his secret??? (that he's queer)

aaaah idk idk. thoughts????? would love to hear about other people's visions

[zykamiliah]

lancelot encouraging merlin to do all his shores with magic so they can have free time for shenanigans and sneaking around and late night talks by the fire sharing stolen wine and sleepovers :>

[zykamiliah]

what actually KILLS me about mercelot is that both of them thought the "more (important) than anything" thing was about their respective loves for arthur and gwen. and they aren't exactly wrong! they DO love them but. buuuuuuuuuuuut. and this is when i lose it. they'd become SO IMPORTANT to each other in the past year, and were already so special to each other before that (lancelot knew everything about merlin and kept his secret and was his ride or die; merlin was the ONLY ONE who reached out to lancelot after everything) but the larger than life, idealistic feelings surrounding their relationships to arthur and gwen (respectively) eclipsed that, and it did that because for a year they had each other. they were constantly together. you cannot miss what you have by your side. they were intimate in all the ways that matter. lancelot is SO IN SYNC with merlin: he's always the first to reach him when merlin is down. the level of awareness lancelot has of merlin's place in space... the implications of it. and merlin confides in lancelot, tells him everything: every thought, every doubt, every plan. he's soooo happy before the veil was teared down. he has a friend with whom he can be himself! a friend that supports him, doesn't constantly berate him for how he uses his magic (coughgaiuscough) and even encourages him to use it for menial tasks like dealing with a stain. lancelot is fiercely loyal to merlin and IT DOESNT MATTER that he has to lie to arthur's face because in truth, lets face it, his loyalty to arthur and camelot come second. his love for gwen lighted the way at the lowest point of his life, and he gave that up because he thought it was the right thing to do; and he lost her, and gwen kinda moved on, and lancelot was moving on, too. but both merlin and lancelot were hung up on the longing-- merlin, on wanting arthur to see him as he was, and lancelot, mourning what he'd lost with gwen. but all through that they were glued to each other, no one questioned lancelot following merlin everywhere because it was already a thing by the time of the darkest hour. it is the most simple and honest love, a kind of peace and comfort that goes unremarked until is lost. and they didn't know until it was too late.

[zykamiliah]

me: don't say it *fist in mouth* dontya dare say it

me:

me: lancelot went to superhell for merlin

[zykamiliah]

guys we need to talk about lancelot being a bit problematic, because often he's written as this Perfect Knight etc etc and while I agree he's The Whole PackageTM and he's very noble he's also FULL of imperfections and insecurities about who he is, his worth and his place in the world. and that impacts how he treats other people (like he let go of gwen without asking her what she wanted. I personally don't think he ever treated her as more than his Lady, she was never a person to him)

plus he like, swore an oath when he became arthur's knight and made a promise to gwen to protect arthur, but in the darkest hour part 2 he disregarded all that to protect merlin. he BROKE HIS WORD (!!!) for merlin, but also for himself because I think his relationship with merlin is the closest thing he has to a family, the one he lost when he was very very young, and why WE aren't talking about this trauma??? the thing that most likely functions as the cornerstone of his character?? he probably has survivor guilt, which means that he WON'T let anyone he loves die in front of him again, he vowed that to himself, and so MERLIN can't die because merlin is his friend and his family and more than anything; merlin is the one WHO NEVER FORGOT lancelot was out there, waiting. not arthur, not gwen; merlin was the one to call for him.

and that's why lancelot smiled before walking into the veil.

[zykamiliah]

The mercelot tag has been invaded by bots so just to add some real content before mass reporting all of them:

Lancelot would laugh himself silly if he ever saw Merlin as Dragoon or the Dolma, but would commit to the bit and act as courteous and respectful as it's to be expected from a knight consorting with an elder or/and an old lady.

Just imagine Lancelot kissing the Dolma's hand chivalrously while the knights and Arthur gape like idiots

"the dolma" of course bats her eyelashes at the handsome knight and praises him

[zykamiliah]

Because I can't help making parallels between my favorite characters, this recent issue with SY!SQQ kind of reminds me of BBC Merlin's Gwaine. This is another example of a really nice, morally sound and incredible character, specifically one who doesn't like royalty and refused to disclose he was a noble because he thinks nobility it's something you achieve in life with your actions. He loves his friends, he loves Merlin (you know it's canon) and Percival and Elyan and all of those he met in Camelot and became his family, will fight to the death for them.

But Gwaine unfortunately holds prejudice against sorcerers(which is the show is kind of a metaphor for queerness) because he doesn't know better, because that's what he has learned in the land he lives in. He ends up serving a kingdom that didn't lifted the ban on sorcery as a knight who has to enforce the law.

And still you can't say he's a bad person in canon because he isn't, those prejudices are just a reflection of his society.

The same applies to Shen Yuan.

And even then SY!SQQ is not actively exercising his internalized queerphobia on anyone, nor is he shaming anyone outside of his head. He treats even a villain with unspecified gender with respect and uses neutral pronouns on his head to refer to them. He never calls his future husband any derisive words. His queerphobia is all internalized and a reflection of his issues with his sexuality and how closeted and repressed he is.

Kind people and good people can be prejudiced. That's an unfortunate part of life. What I think is that there's always opportunity to learn to be better, chances to understand other people and experiences.