Tinch

digital diaries x comfort space

[talkisnevercheap]

It’s genuinely been so long since I’ve been using this and I am angry. About a multitude of things regarding him. Well really it being two reasonings as to why I am angry. 1.) that he hasn’t changed for shit and 2.) the fact that he’s doing this again to me to manipulate me I’m gonna tell him straight up whenever he answers like dude just hmu when you’re free and when you are dtf. Don’t bring up fake plans that’ll never happen. I alr told him off through imessage and ig soooo gtf on. You’re not serving me in anyway shape or form so please leave me alone.

[talkisnevercheap]

Thinking abt this new tall dark man in my maladaptive dreams. He treats me so good & it’s always princess treatment w me

[talkisnevercheap]

I love being able to pop my shit in the likes and comforts of this account.

Ste doesn’t deserve me whatsoever.

I thought i needed another man to distract me from him and i really didn’t lol….today only consumed me and only me

Got taken to a flea-market, cleaned my room and decorated, read my book, and watched a rom-com

This girl is going to be okay.

[talkisnevercheap]

Kinda in a place where I just want all men to burn and to leave me alone

Im tired of settling and tired of being so forgiving

Im tired of training and teaching a man how to act right or how to treat me

The only time im instructing a man to maximize my satisfaction is during sex. Period.

No I will not beg you to go on that date.

No I will not beg you to give me flowers.

No i will not beg you to feed into my interest.

God. Universe. Send me someone who will come correct the first time.

Minor mistakes and flaws that can be corrected and fixed with effort and time is realistic and something Im willing to settle for because we’re all human.

But the bare minimum should not be a “rare occurrence”

I deserve the love that i desire someone to compliment and adhere to my needs, love languages, and concerns.

That’s not too much to ask for and I’m grand.

[talkisnevercheap]

So much has happened and i mean so much has happened BUT LOW-KEY IM GETTING BACK TO MY OLD SELF? THANK GOD

Brought a new book with a gift card I found and I really like it

I have a new kitten named Sage and I love her to death.

Had the greatest Halloweekend ever.

Did not attend class for a full month.

Boston next week.

Cursed ‘S’ out.

Mentally checking out with S.

Gaining the weight in my quads and ass.

Glowing a lot more on the inside

Feeling: lost

[talkisnevercheap]

I really like being single idk i feel so empowered telling men what i want and how things go…..

PEOPLE PLEASER NO LONGER…

I’m not sure when the first half was written but um….yeah empowered…

[talkisnevercheap]

Men,

The specie that disappoints

[talkisnevercheap]

[talkisnevercheap]

I’m so serious when I say I might have to start selling it

[talkisnevercheap]

Wow July 27th I just paid that debt off ayeee so update!!! I’m no longer in contact with BL and it was a mutual agreement but mostly me like it was me having to end things if that’s makes sense. Like he knew he needed to make those steps towards going no contact w me but he couldn’t…he didn’t have the strength which meant in turn that I had to be the one who cut things off. I was honest…I told him I couldn’t go back…the reason as to why and it’s also like why would I do that if you aren’t changing and your friends even said that you didn’t change so? Why would I ever go back…knowing everything that I know & who you are as a person I want to slap my 19 year old self in the face but I won’t because she…- I cannot wait to dissect that part of past just a bit because….but back to the present…I told him he needs more growing up to do and that I regressed as a person being with him because I wasn’t my true self. Everyone I speak to tells me he’s a bum pero like I don’t like using that term but it’s truth behind that and I have to accept it…if everyone’s saying it…it’s true….everyone thought I was raising him…that was true to an extent and I wanted that to be no longer…I was tired of having to re-explain my feelings and so so many boundaries have been crossed with him…even moments of me freezing up….& he blocked me and unfollowed me on everything and I’m okay with that to an extent like I’m feeling feelings of guilt like did I do something wrong and it’s like if I had cut contact off w him sooner….he would’ve blocked me sooner…I don’t think he’s watching my page anymore but for the sake of my mental I don’t want to fixate on him blocking me too much so I blocked his number and I just deleted twitter….it felt nice and lowk gonna go into the sem feeling a bit better tbh…I did alll I could and like Jake told me today cut contact leave him where he’s at because he’s not at that place in his life where he needs to be or where I wanted him to be…there’s so much peace in knowing sooo much peace in knowing that I made the right decision…coming to the mountains no bullshit it’s fuck that loser FUCK THAT LOSER FUCK THAT LOSER FUCK THAT LOSER FUCK THST LOSER FUCK THAT LOSER FUCK THAT LOSER I needed to get that off me chest…everyone’s right and I do deserve better and his judgement shouldn’t cloud mines & now that I’m a little more calmed down now lmfao here’s a quote “best thing I’m learning about relationships is just enjoy your time w them. Let it flow, live in the moment, no one is yours to keep and no one belongs to you” & that’s the perfect quote to end off the night thank yaaa…also reposting whatever I want because that’s how I’ll express me self >_<

[talkisnevercheap]

Imma do a quick scan of my latest post sorry for going ghost life has been awesomeness

[talkisnevercheap]

Wait I forgot all about ts LMFAOOOO

[talkisnevercheap]

Was able to buy my Sephora cart, pay off my debt, & found money to use for thrifting. Recently been into scents and natural beauty enhancements such as blush and serums…everything is slowly coming into place in my life and I’m beyond happy…so so close to decentering men almost there…the focus has shifted and suddenly my body is one of something I’ve never seen before-in full amazement in admiration the woman I’ve wanted and yearned to be for years…I’m holding the reigns everything is done within my terms

[talkisnevercheap]

Very grateful and very blessed

[scorpiorightss]

The versatility of Black hair

[talkisnevercheap]

It’s crazy the kinds of things the universe gives back to you when you l pour into yourself..: but them again you are technically the universe in a way so it’s like you’re rewarding yourself….tea

[talkisnevercheap]

Current fixations:

- elf blush

- glute workouts

-accessories

-nails

-room decor

- my ex