Tokyo Revengers Groupchat (Final Timeline)
Warnings: suggestive (i might have to change this warning to "mentions of sexual content" bcs it's too tame of a warning for the stuff that's actually in here), swearing, the word "pedophile" is mentioned, mentions of substance abuse
Desc: Everyone finds out Takemitchy and Mikey are time leapers, which leads to some...interesting questions
Mitsuya: so let me get this straight
Mitsuya: you're a time traveler, and you've lived dozens of timelines to prevent Hina from dying but she kept dying anyway but then when you got to one where she didn't die, Mikey was some deranged criminal lord and was miserable and depressed and tried to kill himself so you had to go back in time again to make sure everything was fixed but ended up dying while fighting Mikey but then somehow you both went back in time and rewrote all of our entire lives??
Mitsuya: so Mikey's a time traveler too?
Mikey: yeah it's crazy i know
Draken: do you guys have any way to prove this?
Chifuyu: this explains why i keep getting random visions of me in alternate universes. holy shit
Haruchiyo: weird ass prank
Takemitchy: i think it happened since you're close to me and we basically did everything together. i'm not sure
Inupi: we're just gonna believe this?
Kisaki: this...defies all logic of anything ever.
Mikey: i'm sorry it's just that in ever other timeline you've ruined my life so it's difficult to be nice to you sometimes
Kisaki: so you don't like me because of something i did in another universe?
Baji: i'm gonna entertain this cause i'm bored but what was i like in other timelines
Mikey: yeah, it kinda drove me to insanity
Mikey: you killed yourself to save Kazutora
Baji: what was the context
Baji: there wasn't any other way?
Mikey: you're kinda pissing me off cause that's what i was wondering, actually
Kazutora: thanks man. appreciate it🙏
Kazutora: i'll slobber on your meat later, as a proper thank you
Baji: i'd appreciate that. thanks homie🙌
Baji: you wanna slobber on my meat? i mean i won't stop you. as long as i can call you kitten.
Koko: ...i was talking about me in alternate universe's😐
Takemitchy: i don't think we should go there guys. there's too many timelines, and not everything was exactly the same. and also in general it was a really traumatizing experience for me and i kind of want to end my life every time i think about it
Hanma: womp womp. what about me???
Hanma: THANK GOD, I KNEW IF I COULDN'T DO IT HERE, MULTIVERSE ME WOULD HAVE LIVED THE DREAM
Hanma: are me and Tetta-san together in every universe
Hanma: and he denies we're soulmates😔
Kisaki: i will not hesitate to get another restraining order
Hanma: a piece of paper won't stand in my way. let's get married
Kisaki: i will call the police
Draken: guys are we really entertaining this?
Mikey: you went to jail in one of the timelines and you were bald LMAO
Baji: why'd he go to jail?
Mikey: these guys killed Emma and Ken-chin took revenge
Mikey: he was given a death sentence
Ran: humour me, what was i like?? was i famous?
Mikey: you were a criminal. killed people
Ran: sounds about right if i'm being honest
Ran: and Haruchiyo and Rindou?
Haruchiyo: leave me out of Takemitchy's psychotic episodes
Haruchiyo: i think you have a hallucination/delusion disorder or something
Mikey: but don't you believe me?
Haruchiyo: Mikey, you're also pretty mentally ill
Haruchiyo: i just have substance abuse problems and i'm getting clean so...
Mikey: GUYS I'M TELLING THE TRUTH I SWEAR
Mikey: I'VE BEEN GOING CRAZY KEEPING THIS A SECRET
Draken: when was the last time you slept?
Baji: guys just play pretend.
Mikey: same as your brother just uh, less gay and slutty?
Inupi: you didn't do Koko
Mikey: Inupi got normal at some point because he and Ken-chin got close and they fixed bikes together and had sex
Draken: you're really starting to piss me off.
Mikey: Akane died in the fire though like she was BURNT
Takemitchy: uh Mikey-kun...
Mikey: she was a crisp i'm telling you
Mikey: Inupi you had an ugly red scar on your face and no one wanted you
Mikey: Izana i know you're reading this, you were fucking insane dude like you killed Emma for some fucking reason then Kisaki shot you 3 times in the chest and you died while having a really bad mental breakdown. it was a major L on your part
Chifuyu: Mikey why are you leaving out the fact that the common denominator in every single timeline was that you killed every single one of your friends in the most brutal ways possible🤨?
Smiley: how'd he kill me?
Chifuyu: Takemitchy help me out here
Takemitchy: i don't want to talk about it😐
Smiley: he killed me by giving me backshots..?
Smiley: i would NEVER take it from behind
Smiley: especially from MIKEY
Smiley: small dick having ass
Smiley: my bootyhole is not to be messed with
Smiley: i'm so pissed off right now holy shit
Smiley: how did i even die???? dick so good it killed me?
Baji: 3/10 joke 👎, poor delivery, fell flat
Smiley: i hope you kill yourself, Mikey
Mikey: trust me, i've tried
Chifuyu: he shot you in the back with a gun?
Chifuyu: what's wrong with you
Smiley: oh my bad i though you meant like, he was taking me doggy style
Chifuyu: Hakkai was tied to a chair and burnt to death
Chifuyu: why am i getting all these memories, i'm freaking out
Hakkai: Mikey please tell me what i did to deserve that ☹️
Mikey: idk Hakkai i was going through a lot
Draken: have you been diagnosed with anything?
Mikey: i don't need a diagnosis bcs i'm fine now, you're all alive and i don't have any murderous intent!!! yippee🤗
Mikey: isn't this great Takemitchy??
Takemitchy: well, yeah no ones dead so that's great
Izana: this is obviously completely fabricated
Izana: are you guys that bored?
Senju: man for all that time traveling you sure are a shit boyfriend😭
Takemitchy: did Hina say that☹️??
Senju: it's an observation
Senju: you've had way too many coincidental close calls with other woman💀
Draken: yeah you pissed me off when you thought i was gifting you a prostitute. you had a whole ass girlfriend. shame on you
Senju: and you also almost slept with Emma and you "don't remember"
Smiley: Mitchy's low-key funny as hell because what do you mean you stripped yourself and another girl down to your underwear by accident
Baji: wouldn't Takemitchy be a pedophile then?? Emma was 13 dawg🤨
Baji: you're gonna ride Takemitchy's dick to defend him from trying to sleep with your 13 year old sister??? crazy
Baji: wasn't be mentally 26🤨?
Baji: bro i'm gonna beat your ass actually
Mikey: you know what Mitchy, why did you do that 🤨?
Mitsuya: why did i come back to Takemitchy facing pedophile allegations, like what's going on right now
Kazutora: is it not enough that he changed the space and time continuum just to be with his girl?
Kazutora: cheating this cheating that, my boy deserves all the pussy he wants
Kazutora: he's been beaten, shot, stabbed AND killed
Kazutora: i personally believe he's the goat
Chifuyu: goat is an acronym for "greatest of all time", Baji-san
Kazutora: bro you're so fucking stupid😭
Draken: i don't care if he was skinned alive by an orangutan, there's no excuse to cheat on someone
Rindou: i think being skinned alive by an orangutang warrants having more than one girl. idk that's just me tho
Ran: not the point that's being made rn
Rindou: what exactly is the point that's being made
Rindou: is this real. are we being serious.
Rindou: i don't think i get the joke
Haruchiyo: i think we should all stop talking now
Mikey: Mitchy we need to talk a bit
Takemitchy: i told you this was a bad idea
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