I love Tim Drake so much @tarffie - Tumblr Blog

this-is-what-makes-us-fandoms

Quarantine Shenanigans pt.6

Dick walking into the kitchen at 4 am for a glass of water:

Y/N and Tim stopping midway of making pancakes:

Dick: Please for the love of god tell me you guys got at least an hour of sleep?

Tim: Bold of you to assume I sleep

Y/N: Define sleep

Dick: Are you making pancakes?

Y/N: Would you like some?

Dick: ...yes please

gloomsday

sent this message to my coworker today and he sent me this screenshot with microsoft teams's suggested replies... incredible 10/10 no notes.

toxiccaves

notajerusalemcricketd-deactivat

dehydratedbunny

Miku wouldnt fucking misgender her >:c

incorrectbatfam

Tim: People who sleep with their phone on silent or DND really don't give a fuck about anybody.

Jason: Look, if you decide to have a problem after midnight that’s between you and your Lord.

Duke: How do you set your phone to Dungeons and Dragons?

batshit-auspol

May 2014: Senator Bill Heffernan complains about the lack of metal detectors in parliament, tabling a pipe bomb he's brought with him as evidence

harpyjack

someone questioned the quality of the image and thought it might be AI and I'm here to confirm this is real

incorrectbatfam

Selina, seductively: Oh Bruce, say my name.

Bruce: My name.

Selina:

Selina: You have children, don't you?

Bruce: How did you know?

demonicsuffrage

Bruce has a strict 'no metas/powers (except duke) allowed in Gotham' policy in place but it has a clause, BYOR (Bring Your Own Robin)

No one is allowed entry untill and unless they can produce their very own certified robin-shaped identity card

Whenever someone with even a hint of supernatural powers in them arrives at Gotham, they're first met with Bruce standing at the city border with a notepad in hand

Bruce: State your name and purpose.

Kon: Kon-el, here to hangout!

Bruce: Your Robin?

Kon, flourishing Tim from behind him: Ta-Da!

Tim, waves: Hey Bruce

Bruce: Approved, you may enter

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Name and purpose?

Hal: Here to investigate a case, Hal Jordan

Bruce: Your Robin?

Hal: I.... don't have one?

Bruce: Denied

Hal: What?! But-

Bruce: Denied.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Yes, Wally, where's your robin?

Wally: Oh shit lemme just- *zaps away and returns with Dick, who was in the midst of brushing his teeth, in a bridal carry*- Here!

Bruce, grumbling a little: Fine. Approved.

Dick: You gotta stop using me as a key already, man

Wally: Blame Bruce.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Name and purpose?

Clark: Clark Kent, here for our monthly barbecue

Bruce: Robin?

Clark, producing an actual robin bird: Does this count?

Bruce:.....yes

snakeredbirdbatkatana

Did you make Batman into border patrol?!?! Specifically the Canadian border Patrol cause they don't actually make me want to kms.

sunny-possum-pal

Protect Trans kids

9thdimension

nami and robin for one piece: heroines

transgenderization

the. 'china will use electric vehicles to map american roads' thing chud conspiracy theorists are trying to spin is especially funny considering that theyre literally. already mapped. theres already maps of them youve. car satnavs have existed for like 30 years

incorrectbatfam

Dick was the last to be adopted, Jason became the black sheep post-resurrection, Tim made himself Robin, Damian was dropped in Gotham after ten years of being kept secret, Cass possesses killer instincts that run counter to Batman's philosophy, Duke is a meta whose parents are still alive (albeit jokerized), and Steph has zero legal connections to the Waynes. All of the batkids have reason to believe they're the only one Bruce doesn't want around and Bruce is unaware of the problem because they don't vocalize it not just out of the usual emotional constipation, but also a deep-seated fear of being proven right. In this essay, I will—

artistica18

The Brood

moveslikekeithrichards

gertrude

[ID: a picture of an old, grumpy-looking brown tabby cat gazing dead-eyed into the camera.]

moveslikekeithrichards

gertrude circa 2009 (she was grandmas cat up until a few years ago. we dont do outdoor cats. she is now exclusively an indoor cat)

[ID: the same cat but as a kitten, popping out of a hole in a deck.]

business-as-usual-bats

Read a fanfic where Tim Drake thinks Bruce ignored his birthday, then on some random day was like, "Happy Birthday, Tim!" And Tim was like, "It's not my birthday...?" And Bruce was like, "Uh, according to your birth certificate it is, though?"

And the birth certificate shows a date with a different month and day than Tim thought was his birthday, and he realized his parents just FORGOT when his birthday was and essentially picked either a random day or a day more convenient for their schedules or a day they could remember better-

Tim, this whole time, had a completely different birthday than what he'd been celebrating his whole life, and he is so MAD. Like no shit his life doesn't make any goddamm sense he's been a fucking Pisces this whole time