FUCK YOU, HOENN! if you’re dumb enough to get a degree in geology, you’re a big enough schmuck to get a job as part of Team Magma! Volcanoes! Built-in mortal enemies! Primordial earth gods! If you think you can have a job with good pay in Team Magma, you can kiss my ass! It’s our belief that you’re such a stupid motherfucker, that you’ll fall for this bullshit GUARANTEED! Bring your berries, bring your Pokemon, bring your sacred orbs, WE’LL STEAL THEM. That’s right, we’ll steal your orbs! Because in Team Magma, you’re fucked six ways from Sunday. Don’t wait! Don’t delay! DON’T FUCK WITH US, or we’ll rip your nuts off. Only in Team Magma: the only villainous organization that tells you to FUCK OFF! HURRY UP ASSHOLE! This offer ends the minute after you come to the interview, and you better hope the boss doesn’t give a fuck about your fake trainer’s license, or you’re a dead motherfucker. GO TO HELL! Team Magma. The most filthy and the meanest sons-of-bitches in the region of Hoenn—GUARANTEED!
